Until we stop choosing trauma, we can’t know peace.
My surgery is tomorrow. I have spent today doing laundry, drinking water, updating my blog with posts I wrote in October but didn’t post and trying not to think about my surgery tomorrow. The last time I went through this I didn’t know what to expect and it was kind...
I Can’t Get Away from My Abusers
More nightmares last night. I can’t get away from my abusers no matter what I do. But I am not without empathy towards them and maybe that is part of it. I see that they are worthy of love. Trauma is passed down from generation to generation and hopefully each...
Growing up
I hear a child having a meltdown in the hallway and I want to cry with her. Children should never have to live in a hotel. It is not fun living in a hotel. At all... As thankful as I am that we have survived here over 2 years, spending every penny we have to get by,...
We Are Not Alone
Karen came in all hot today because Russell Wilson got traded to the Broncos. I do have some empathy for her but I know Russell and his wife are believers and good business people and they will probably come out even better because of this change... My heart is heavy...
Happy 57th Birthday Karen
Today is Karen’s birthday! She is 57 years old and even though that is just a number I am so thankful for that number. Her life means so much to me because she is a light and joy in mine. Happy birthday My Love. I often think about how important life is and...
Food for Thought
I realized today that some of my depression is that I miss enjoying food. I miss coffee made in a French Press with cream. I miss green tea with honey. I miss avocado with a little Himalayan Sea Salt. I have a strong sense of smell and a good palate...enter cancer...
Veda is Here
I am so blessed to have everything I need. I don’t tend to go into detail when I am depressed but Veda has been here 3 days. I named her that. I can already imagine the conversation with my psychiatrist tomorrow: No. I don’t think I need more meds. I think I can name...
Empathy is Good, Judgement is Not
I was harassed recently by a "friend" of a friend who is having a hard time and I really had some things I wanted to say in response to their messages...empathy is good, judgement is not... I am such a lucky woman! I do have trials but I am able to see patterns and...
Mourning and Learning
Mourning and learning are hard. I have struggled in my head this week. It is real but not something I can put on a shelf. But I have communicated some boundaries I need. I have told doctors what I needed from them. I have told my wife I need time with just her (I look...
Happy Valentines Day 2022
Karen G Clemenson and I don’t do Valentines Day...there is never a day that goes by that we don’t tell or show each other that we love each other and appreciate each other so we don’t need a commercialized day to celebrate it...if we get to foster/adopt we will soften...
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