I had an appointment today to see my hematologist. I had already rescheduled it once so even though everything hurt this morning and I still randomly cry, we went. I am a little frustrated with the fact that my body has plateaued at 95 lbs lost and won’t budge so it was also an excuse to make myself walk more.
I will be on Eliquis for the rest of my life because of complications from cancer. But Dr Dong said she was happy to see me looking better. It’s been a year. I have lost about 50 lbs since she saw me and also I had just had a heavy dose of radiation after fighting cancer for 3 years. My body, which rebels at any chance she gets and does not care what normal bodies do, completely freaked out and both my lungs had tons of blood clots in them, which was way worse than the first time and required surgery. So I can see how she would notice a huge difference in me today.
I was happy because I fit in a chair in the lobby that I didn’t fit in at the beginning of my cancer journey. I know this because Dr Dong and Dr Westhoff are in the same clinic at Legacy Salmon Creek. But also my dosage of Eliquis is now at maintenance level so that is a step in the right direction. June 18 is the anniversary of my one radiation treatment. I was supposed to have more but so many things happened and I said no more and then Dr Westhoff decided to order a PET scan and found that my cancer was gone.
Dr Dong asked if I was going to have surgery. I needed to lose weight to have the hysterectomy, but I now need to lose fat to be well. During stays in the hospital, where they do the tests that they do to see what they need to see, I found out I have fat on my heart and liver and so now that I have figured out how to lose it, I need to keep losing fat to be healthy and help my organs heal. I have decided I won’t have a hysterectomy unless cancer returns.
I will be telling Dr Westhoff at my appointment in a few weeks. If I have a hysterectomy, it could take a year for me to recover and, especially with where I carry my weight, this could be very hard on me and stop me from losing weight. So for now, I will keep doing what I am doing to be well and move as much as I can in a body that never stops hurting. I will deal with cancer if it comes around again.
Look for pretty things
But lately I have learned that my Spirit is powerful and connected in ways I never imagined and even though I have known for a long time that I absorb the emotions of others and I can generate change, I didn’t realize that the feeling of belonging I never felt, and always wanted, was blocked for some reason, because I do belong here and I love Cowlitz County. I love Kelso-Longview. And yes I see these two cities as one, but I don’t think that takes away from their individual experiences, because sisters can still hold hands and love each other but still be individuals, who abide together to share resources and a future.
Because today was the first time I left Cowlitz County since the disaster at Nippon, I was discombobulated. My twitching was pronounced, but maybe only to me. Karen G Clemenson keeps telling me things that I can’t remember much beyond what I need right now. I started to feel more normal when we stopped by to see Jamie Holloway after my doctor appointment, but she is home too. Although I distinctly missed home several times while we were away.
We didn’t take our normal exit when we came home because we wanted to get coffee at the Kelso Red Leaf Organic Coffee Co. so we could support the fundraising effort today. As soon as we hit Kelso my arms started hurting and it continued up and over my body. It was my skin. It burned slightly and was heavy. At first I sat with it, wondering if it would go away; maybe my body was having a moment. But it didn’t stop. As we got closer to where we were going, I started giving Karen directions because the traffic revisions, in that area, still throw her off. Finally I asked her if she felt it too and she said yes.
I have been home, in Longview, and even taken a nap. It still hurts. We still hurt. We are hurting. And, as someone who is chronic and has faced death and had to come back from it a few times, its gonna hurt for a while because healing takes time.
I love you. Be blessed.
~
~
Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
I don’t struggle with my faith
or what I believe about God
because He and I are as solid as the fact that
He never changes
And His love never leaves
But while I live in this earth
this body I live in is subject
to laws and expectations
set by human hands
Not the ones that carry me
I love the trees and tall grasses
The sound of the water all around
He made those for me
~
As people label the Triune or Trinity Yahweh or Elohim Allah, Brahma,Zeus or The Great Spirit
I don’t care if you don’t believe
in a Creator or Supreme Being
I know what I know
and I don’t have energy
or I won’t give energy
to sell you mine
Because a God that created this magnificent earth
can advertise
and close the deal on a relationship with you
~
I am not brittle
though I have been broken
I am not afraid of you
because my left leg weighs
more than most of you
If you attack me
I will just sit on you
until the authorities arrive
I enjoy the silence because
I enjoy surrender
I don’t trust people
but I do love you
Let’s dance on this earth together
~
Faith is strength
when seated in the correct plan
because it isn’t found in control
or people, time, money
or what humans understand
and efficiency that leaves no room for release
Because fear is a tool and currency
when we go to the author of our faith
and let Them carry us when
we must let Their faith be enough
because ours is not
When our tears are many
we can trade them for love
~
Because love is what we are here for folks
I saw it yesterday in a parking lot
When 5000 or so gathered
to feed our family
When people from Kelso-Longview
and Kalama and Castle Rock
and Woodland came
to hold up our brothers
Even though we aren’t perfect
and we mount coffins in the wrong spot
We still are Cowlitz County
And our Maker is holding space for us
And we are holding up each other
~
So don’t worry if you’re broken
If you can’t walk without help
If you can’t quote scripture
If you can only smile
Because we are here to love our neighbor
If we did it wrong yesterday
Do it right today
Perfect is not found here
just give us the best you got
~
Donate to Nippon Families
Now you can Venmo your donation to the families affected by the Nippon tragedy. Use this QR code to transfer to the fund established by Cowlitz Wahkiakum Labor Council and the Longview/Kelso Building Trades Council held at Longshoremen’s FCU. You can also donate at ANY Cowlitz County credit union. Or, donate through our Online Banking by transferring to 788370-02-Community.
Somewhere over the rainbow
the world is exactly the same
because God
doesn’t like illusions
But He is love
and there is no evil in Him
So we don’t wear masks
or play mind games
and every person is important
~
White Liquor has a pH over 13
it can take hours to wash off
By itself it causes deep tissue damage
Mix it with any other substance
and you’re adding more trouble
Hours under running water to
remove this corrosive compound
sounds like a reason to want to die
or at least disassociate
~
If you are new to Kelso-Longview
you might not understand
Why we walk carefully
around the topic
We were created to be a Mill Town
and that is what we are Shift work and rough hands are our foundation
But we rally to care for
brothers and sisters
~
The same love that is God
that keeps you chasing life
even when chemical burns are eating you alive
And neighbors who may never have met before
join at a barbecue
to raise money for our family
It brings us together
because no matter what you call love
We have it in Cowlitz County
My insides are raw from crying
and they aren’t even just my own tears
My muscles ache
and my joints pop
from clenching
and power surges that keep me awake
I woke the ancestors of many
I saw them gather at the foot of my bed
~
I am not afraid
I have known I was here for a large commitment
I have dreamed of and tried to leave
But I always returned
and now I am here to stay
So I might as well be the catalyst
But the goal is not calluses
It is new growth for a new generation
~
I hear the edge in my voice
I hear the roar in my veins
I see it also in my sister’s eyes
as she fights her way back from death
Again
What I am experiencing is carnal
I am at capacity
It isn’t that I don’t care
~
I am not angry
or I would not be communicating at all
I want to be understood My soul is mourning
and she doesn’t want to lose anyone else
I don’t hate actually
I love so thoroughly
I want the hurting to stop
so let’s do something we’ve never done
I’m on fire again
but I have been knocked down
so many times
I can function at any level
I find myself at
I’m not always at my best on my feet
because I have spent so much time getting back up again
~
I’m used to the smell of cinders
I have considered changing
my name to Cinderella
but I like Birkenstocks
I am sure they are better for plantar fasciitis than glass high heels
Plus I love my queen
I don’t want a mere prince
~
It’s tragic how the water in the slough
turns black
when it gets flooded with White Liquor
But who needs wild life and fresh water
Even in a Mill Town
that requires trees
How many more defensive attacks
will we experience before we are through
~
Dispatch called in EMS
because my heart stopped
But I will be ok
I just needed a reboot
Give me a minute
I will be with you shortly
Thank you for your patience
We have just experienced a catastrophic event
Holy, Holy, Holy Is The Lord God Almighty and I am one of His but there are people running around screaming Trump Derangement Syndrome And the odd thing is I am sure they have it and they scream DTS to throw off their scent while they don’t realize that we are not in Washington DC
~
I love them but what they are doing Never feels, looks, or sounds like love to me Lord Jesus I need an ice pop because hell fire is right here It’s all in the bible but it is the opposite of what You said to do The fines cost less than compliance and no one made them comply The mess is so dangerous to clean up and some of them they will never find
~
My hometown is suffering catastrophic consequences due to ignored due diligence Because economics sometimes outweighs the needs of people Because even though some try to sell us the lie That religion is our foundation Back room deals and doctored balance sheets are the real leader of the US of A
~
Thank You to my Creator for the people who are working together The Kelso-Longview community who will support each other When the president has said nothing The GoFundMes the fundraisers and the soft words mean the world to me Because we are Cowlitz Strong We don’t even realize the shoulders we are standing on and the tears I cried today were not just my own
This Store has been set up as a fundraiser store to help raise money for the Families affect by the tragic events at the Nippon Mill in Longview. With tragic events such as this, we have to come together as a community and do what we can to help. We would like to donate a portion of our proceeds(10$ per shirt/15$ per hoodies) to the Lower Columbia Longshoremen’s credit union donation account for the families affected. We will make and ship orders in batches, roughly every 2 weeks. Thank you so much for your support!
If you are curious about us and how we make your gear, check out http://TGArtCo.com.
PLEASE NOTE, CREDIT CARDS WILL SHOW TEAM UNIFORM ORDERING (TUO) ON YOUR STATEMENT. PLEASE DO NOT DISPUTE THE CHARGE OR YOU WILL BE ASSESSED A $15 FEE THAT THE CREDIT CARD PROCESSOR CHARGES. IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS REGARDING THIS, PLEASE CONTACT US DIRECTLY BEFORE ORDERING
Sometimes we moan
whether in our body or Spirit
when words aren’t enough “The Spirit intercedes with groanings too deep for words and God who searches hearts knows the mind of the Spirit because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to His will”
~
We are His creation and He is mine
Though I wasn’t born here
I am a daughter of Kelso-Longview
I have not slept for longer than and hour or two
since Monday May 25th of 2026
Nothing would shut down this Washingtonian body
wired and rebooted in Cowlitz County I know this pain I feel is not just mine
~
The sounds and sirens and wailing
whether imagined or real
was louder than the ringing in my ears
or the music on my iPhone
So as the electric pulses shot through my face
as I Googled electromagnetic force field
because even though science is a topic
I never excelled at, words intrigue me
and this phrase flashed in my mind
~
This group of words explains why opposites attract
and why being neutral goes nowhere
I think that is why I hate ignorance
and stagnance
and I love questions
This town was built by people with rough hands
but people without calluses run it
I love the color green because I love trees
not because I love money
~
But financing is necessary to keep
currency flowing in all fields
However love is free when we want it to be
and right now 2 people are confirmed dead
and 9 humans are missing and 8 injured
and I can’t look at the picture of the implosion
that happened at Nippon yesterday without feeling sick
I love you
Be blessed
There is a monster in my closet
I didn’t put her there
But I remember a life
before it wasn’t
and then it was
because my father put it there
~
I remember always being happy
when I had rainbows on my curtains
When I dreamed of being a singer
When I helped him build our shed
But then he got a job at the gas station
right next door to The Woodshed it was different
~
And the yelling probably slowed down
because he didn’t come home as much
I remember going there
and waiting in the car
I remember lots of crying
and the phone being hung up
~
I remember being afraid
and the lawn mower being stolen
even though we had grass
and he didn’t
I remember meeting the monster
and thinking: she looks like a witch
~
The scandal was great
and we paid dear
He even had to move because
the guys he worked with didn’t want him near
The monster and I hated each other
and she always won
~
Eventually I left
partially because he told me
“If you are the only one with a problem
then you are the problem.”
I remind myself of that
to avoid wrongful retribution from a narcissist or two
~
I keep cleaning out my closet
but I ran into her the other day
I worry about him because
he seems smaller in some ways
But I can’t be concerned about him
because he made his choice and it wasn’t me
~
Men’s loud voices still make me jump
and sometimes cry
But her voice
The monster’s voice makes all
the hair on my body stand up
and I get very quiet inside
~
I have fought with him and I always win
Because he is a coward
What kind of man leaves a wife and children
for a demon who will help him conquer
everything in their path?
~
I am a warrior because I have learned
To wage my battles
My scars are many
And she is not worth the fight
I have been made small since I was about 4
My gestures
My words
My thoughts and feelings were often too big
not to mention this big body of mine
that doesn’t fit in all chairs
and doesn’t do what I want
I have been thanked for giving you space to be you
and then been criticized for being me
It doesn’t feel like love if I can’t breathe
~
When I was the only one
I was worshipped
But when I was no longer singular
I became a target and
eventually I was too much
Only fit to serve
and often alone
But I am capable of doing great things
And there are people worthy of trusting
I will wait for them to find me
~
The team I have chosen is only 3
but they got me through 13 diagnoses and cancer
They ask me when they don’t know
They let me choose I can be my full self I don’t play games that don’t sit on a shelf
I don’t have to take pictures to prove I love them
because they are with me always
Even if it is just us
~
So I am done being made small
If you don’t want me
If you tell me one thing in September
and then show me another in May
I will walk away
Because my chosen family is
unpretentious but enough for me
And I would rather have honesty
then be part of an emotional shit show
or whatever you think I want
~
I have always hated Reality TV shows
because I live authentically
I think we all have an innate need to be known. I am Summer. My name is sometimes easy for people to remember and all my life, I have heard people say, “Oh, that is Summer,” but I had no idea who they were most of the time. I have always been a behind the scenes person. That is where the people who are great at getting things done but not so great with people go; that is also where they put the fat people.
I am a great person for finishing jobs. I hate lists but I can get them done, not in order but I can accomplish things, in my own time and probably 10 other tasks you didn’t ask for, and maybe, not how you intended them, and most likely you would have preferred that I followed the itemized list, and even though I brought value to your life, you didn’t know you needed, you still need me to finish #2, #6 and #9 and you are wondering why the books had to be alphabetized because you had them in an order, that made sense to you, before I touched them. But don’t worry about that because I will make sure to always bring you the book you need, when you ask, because, remember that is now my job and your way was too hard for me to remember.
If you hand me a manual, I will read it. I will follow all the rules to a T, unless they are about clothing and then I might question to see if there is leeway for my Birkenstocks, piercings and whatever else I want to wear because I prefer modesty, and I don’t like to wear what people tell me to wear, and I have plantar fasciitis.
I am a sensory person. I didn’t know that until a few years ago. It would have helped to know that when I was younger, but here we are. I live with several chronic conditions that cause constant pain. I have had to learn to read a room and myself because sometimes my brain lies to me, but I am a great reader and a fairly good actor so you might never know that I am suffering, unless it is so great that I can’t cover it, in which case, I will either stay home or go there.
I have danced with politics several ways. I have hated politics, but learned that it touches everything so I need to be aware and communicate with my representatives about what I want, or why vote? I have been a republican, democrat, independent and currently I am disenfranchised. However, I believe there are good humans in all people groups and if we find the right ones, I can support those people.
After years of reading and learning about different people, I see that the freedom to marry, which Karen G Clemenson and I did vote for, even before we realized we were voting for our own civil rights, had been hard fought by many before us. People all over the world have been persecuted, criminalized and even killed because they loved someone that went against what other people decided was wrong. They even rewrote the bible to make it a sin in 1947. So even though I have always loved rainbows because they are a promise from God to never destroy the earth, they also are a promise that God loves all of us and the colors signifying: Life, Healing, Sunlight, Nature, Serenity, and Spirit. So Pride Month is important to some of us, whether all of us like it or need it, and I can think that is great.
I have always had an ability to interact with children. Adults and peers have always been hard for me to trust and relate to. I started caring for other people’s children when I was 10. I often had other people’s children with me until I was at least 25, and my nephew, Casey, was born. Then I often had my nephews and nieces with me. Around that time I was trying to learn to interreact with the people around me. I met Karen in 2003 and she was so natural with everyone. I wanted to be like that. Between therapists, books and lots of time with Karen and Jamie Holloway, I have put a lot of time into learning how to listen and respond to people in a more gentle manner.
I started writing, I think as soon as I could put words on paper. I remember writing stories and drawing pictures to go with them even before I could really read. I was a very smart child. My parents saw that and I tested beyond kindergarten so I skipped it and went to 1st grade early. I don’t think that was a good idea. I think there are things I was supposed to learn in kindergarten that I missed. I have often felt like I didn’t fit with people my own age. When Casey was super smart, and my sister was talking about having him skip a grade, I asked her not to. He was a little awkward like me too. I told her I thought there were social things that I missed and I didn’t want him to miss those things. I am thankful that she considered my words.
I have a lot more confidence in my writing than I do my speaking ability. But I don’t just want to be Jamie’s friend or Casey’s auntie or Joanne’s daughter or Karen’s wife. So maybe since I have noticed that people don’t like to read as much as they do listen, I should learn to speak as well as I write.
If you notice, my mouth is small, that is on purpose. I have nerve pain in my face. There might be times that I can’t speak at all. I tend to try to keep the movements in my face small so that I don’t aggravate the muscles in my face.
I was always an active as a child. I rode my bike everywhere and danced every day. I was not wired for sports at all, but I could outdance all my friends. Yet I was always fat. Not as big as I am now. I wish I had known that when I was growing up. I wish that it hadn’t been an issue. Because that is why I would not go to the doctor unless I thought I was dying. I didn’t want to be told I was fat. Duh! If I could change that I would have. I didn’t figure out what I needed to do to lose weight until I had been chronic for 10 years, working to be as well as possible, got cancer, nearly died twice from blood clots, caused by Megestrol. After lots of learning to set boundaries, making myself important, making good habits, and even telling my doctor no, I was losing weight. I have lost 95 lbs so far.
Do I have a reason for this message other than to be known? Maybe but just like, the fact that I didn’t learn my middle name until I was in 4th grade because Summer Clemenson took a long time to learn, Summer Deanne Clemenson was even more of a mouthful, being known takes time.
I have been a receptionist, a Vacation Bible School teacher, a preschool teacher, a nanny, a janitor, a manager of a retail store, a website designer, and Executive Director of a nonprofit. I am a Creative Director of an LLC, a wife, a sister, a daughter, an auntie, a friend, a reader, a writer, a cook…and I am not dead yet, so there will be more to come. How do you really know someone if you have never at least sat with them and had a cup of coffee with them? Are you up for it? Let me know.
I love you. Be blessed.
~
~
Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
I told my therapist I felt like crying
I had letters to write to the school board
but I was too emotional
Matthew said to write first drafts
and read them again tomorrow
~
I told him I was sad
because I didn’t realize how much
it would bother me that The Late Show was cancelled
I always learned something from Stephen Colbert
~
I remember when 47 was 45
I couldn’t say his name without an anxiety attack
I know nothing in the world has changed
We just don’t hide it anymore
Did you know that every president in my lifetime has been shot at?
~
I saw Jamie‘s post that her voice came back
When you breathe through a trach
it is hard to produce enough oxygen
to activate your vocal chords
I have been in a flare and in pain but I liked her comment
~
I did my selfcare and took my meds
I even spoke to Matthew
but I had nothing for today
So I took a nap
When Jamie called I was sound asleep
~
I had given up asking God for her voice
I don’t know if she had
but on the last day of The Late Show
was Jamie’s birthday
and she got her voice
~
And the color of her face was rosy
and she showed me her last surgery
was a success
And her voice is rather sexy
and now my tears are for joy
~
And although many of us are mourning
a show we loved to watch
Stephen has his team
and he will prevail
I have my own team
~
And the humble and excited smile on Jamie’s face
reminded me that I am on Team Jamie
and I am happy to be here!
I remember my mom watching The Late Show. She LOVED David Letterman. I didn’t grow into his sense of humor until, well, I never totally grew into a level of dryness that fit him. But when I married Karen G Clemenson, I suddenly had to accept that I married a person who was really addicted to TV and that my nights were going to be filled with commercials and late night TV and Colbert was, oddly, one of our nightly routines. I didn’t get it because Karen is a republican and Colbert is not. Karen said it is good to listen to your enemies and he was smart and funny and kind. Tonight it is time to say Goodbye to The Late Show and I have been trying to find peace about it and I can’t.
I am just angry that the current administration has struck a blow at my favorite show and won. There is no other late night show I enjoy and want to watch. Because I enjoy Stephen Colbert. He is not too silly, too mean, too dry, too left, too anything, unless he is having a hard moment, as all humans do. And by the next day, or even the next segment, he finds himself back to his intelligent, thoughtful and creative self. For weeks, I have been hoping to hear that it was a joke to get ratings up, but I know it isn’t because Stephen would not have let it go this long.
So before the final show begins I will answer The Colbert Questionnaire:
The Best Sandwich: Thick sliced Tomato and Provolone on Sourdough with lots of mayonnaise and sea salt and pepper
First Concert: DC TALK and Michael W Smith
What is the Scariest Animal: Humans
Apples or Oranges: Apples
Have You Ever Asked Someone Else For Their Autograph: No
What Do You Think Happens When We Die: I think our soul, which holds our energy is free from our body and if we are not tied down by expectation and pain, we are free to go back to our Creator. If we have not finished important things, maybe we get stuck. But I think we also get to come back and visit with those we love, because I have had visits from my grandparents and they have helped me and answered questions I had.
Favorite Action Movie: Speed
Window or Aisle: Window
Favorite smell: Leather and peppermint
Least favorite smell: Cow fields
Earliest Memory: I used to have a dream of being stuck up high with the floor at a 45 degree angle dipping away from me and what looked like green peas falling from me. I had this dream every time I was sick and it would wake me up and I would be terrified, every time. When I was a young adult, I told my mom about it and she asked me how I could remember that. She said I was a baby. We were on a boat on Lake Washington and a belt broke that keeps the boat level. My father was working to get the boat level and my mom threw herself on top of me to keep me in the boat and those peas were the water dripping down from us. Wow!
Cats or Dogs: Cats
You Get One Song…the rest of your life when you listen to music this is the song you get to listen to…: Amazing Grace
What Number Was Stephen Thinking Of? (The answer was almost always 3): I always thought it as 42
Describe the Rest of Your Life in Five Words: Trading love for fear always
In the end, I have enjoyed Stephen saying anything he wants, because what can they do, cancel him? I have loved the variety of guests coming to say goodbye. And I look forward to seeing what he decides to do next because I know he can’t just go home.
Hello Goodbye My Friend
I love you. Be Blessed!
~
Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
I wasn’t going to write today. Today was supposed to be a visit with Jamie Holloway because she is in the hospital. However, Karen G Clemenson was needed somewhere else so, I am at home. And that is ok because Friday night I went to the All Ages Rainbow Prom and that was only one day after I had hyaluronic acid injections in both my knees and I did dance and I did have a great time. But now I need to rest. So we will go see Jamie tomorrow. But I woke up to some videos my mom sent. She sends me all kinds of interesting things but today she shared some stories about people who regretted their transitioning. They felt as though they were pushed into transitioning.
After having such a lovely time at the prom with My Love, where I wished we could do this all the time, I know why we can’t. We are all at our own level of healing. As creative as the Queer Community is, it can be unsafe to be out together. Someone has to be vigilant. Someone has to plan for our safety, not only from the parts of the community that want to hurt us, but from the parts of our bodies that are hurting. I have never been to a party where there was a quiet room. It was amazing to see a person, who was starting to get a migraine and be able to let them know where they could go to have some respite, so they might be able to rejoin us later. And I did see them with their person later. It made my heart so happy! There was only one door that was allowed to be used and there was someone in front of it always and safety people around the building, so we were safe. We could breathe and be safe. Because some of the people in our community are less accepted than others, less healed than others, and more vulnerable than others.
After watching the videos that Mom sent I decided to respond to her, because I have never communicated with her my beliefs and feelings, which are my own.
I think this proves that for many of us, gender is fluid. I am so thankful that Jesus came to meet me when I was 5. He knew I was going to struggle a lot and I was not going trust people and especially doctors for most of my life. So thank you for singing and talking about Him so that I knew He was real and not just another thing I imagined, because I hated my body, I did question my gender, I was so confused with my body at puberty and I thought I was broken because when you are demisexual and you are are not sexually attracted to people until you are emotionally, spiritually and mentally safe or attuned with them (I knew both people I have been with 10 years before I felt safe enough to consider more), you don’t feel like your friends. My friends were always sexualizing other people and I didn’t. I thought I was broken. I was confused because I didn’t even know what queer people were until I was well into my 20’s because I had been so sheltered and even stuck in my own head. I didn’t even have the capacity to imagine bisexual and when I did, I didn’t even think it would mean I would still only want my person because the world made it dirty, and didn’t let it just be honest. But I don’t have the ability to commit to more than one person or even be casual so even being my friend is truly a compliment, because I treat most people like they are at different levels of acquaintance.
That is why I don’t question people who are working on their gender story because it is theirs. They need to figure it out. I will call them what they want. I will listen and let them know I might forget, and that is not because I don’t care about them, it is because I just forget things and I don’t want them to feel bad if I ask them again, later. I don’t question anything they choose to do to feel safe or happy in their body, because I have been miserable in my own. And if they change course, I will roll with them when they do that too. But they might have to remind me of some of that too.
The transgender people I know who have gone through transition, whether through medication or surgery, were adults before they ever started. They were capable of making decisions about their bodies. They were at least 20 something or even 30 something. I do not believe in doing anything beyond counseling for children. And when I say counseling, I am also talking about family counseling because the unit needs help to meet the needs of a child who is potentially wanting to end themselves. It would have to be proven to me after living with a child who has been in serious counseling, seen by all the doctors, evaluated by teachers and maybe even talking to their friends, that I might consider discussing with Karen, that we might need to consider a hormone protocol to avoid suicide, because a dead child cannot heal from anything. But during all of it, my child would be told they were loved. I would not care about clothes, hair, makeup, their name, whatever hobby, sports or anything healthy and safe and encouraging they needed to live and grow.
I think a lot of young people have been guinea pigs for hormone therapy. Something like how psychiatrists over medicated people in the 90’s. Unfortunately they had to learn on somebody.
I may not understand everything or everybody, but I do understand hating myself and being judged and condemned. I try hard to understand but I am still trying to learn myself and I have a lot going on inside my body. And something new is often popping up. That doesn’t mean I don’t love people, it just means that my capacity to handle their newness, is often muffled by the ringing in my ears, the shooting pain in my face, the aches or explosions I feel all over, the general ickiness I live with, the emotions that might be mine, or everyone else’s because I am an empath or any other thing I am constantly juggling. I am always telling myself to shut up and listen and it is sometimes really hard, but I always try. I am a high frequency person and I know I affect others and I am trying to learn how to be in a room and stay gentle.
My regular speaking voice is soft, but if I get angry, which I try super hard, all the time to remain calm, however, if I have had enough, my stand up for myself voice can be heard and felt 2 blocks away and it often takes a few weeks to show people that we are all ok. And I know it sucks because most people are at least a little bit selfish and they might not know it, but they are, and my capacity to forgive is very generous, until I need to tell you, and usually I wait too long, and when you interrupt me, it pisses me off because it is rude. Because we both have the right to be heard.
My opinion is mine; it does not mean I hate you. It also doesn’t mean I am not willing to change it, but if you attack me, I wont be able to hear you because I have been abused too. There are different ways to be transitioned and it isn’t always about gender. Sometimes it is about being heard and learning to love yourself, when no one knew how to do it before. We should all try to be more gentle with each other, but I think we all are trauma victims and we all need more love than we realize.
I love you. Be blessed.
~
Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
As I read the books for this post, I was reminded over and over about how much I really enjoy reading children’s books. I love the simplicity of most stories and even in the history stories, how uncomplicated they are. The art is usually colorful or relaxing. It is a great way to separate oneself from the stress of adulting. What a gift you can give yourself to walk into a library and randomly walk up to shelves full of books and just grab whatever books call to you, knowing that if you don’t love it, it wont take long to finish it and most likely, you will like it. And then greet the librarian, check those books out. Walk out the door. Take pictures of the squirrel who lives in the tree outside and is used to tons of all kinds of people coming through the door outside his tree house and so he is used to flirting with anyone that stops to say hello. And even meeting a neighbor before you climb in your car and drive home to read those books because you want to.
So here is to reading 5 Books for February 2026…and yes…I know it’s late.
The Peanut Man by Carmen Agra Deedy is a beautiful children’simmigration story about how a little girl finds home. Her family was from Cuba. Every night, Emilio, the peanut man would walk through the streets, crying out: ¡Mani! or ¡Peanuts!
From her window, Coqui, would tuck her thumbs in her ears, stick out her tongue and make her silly sound: Thiddle, thiddle, thiddle!
And then Emilio would laugh and do it back!
There came a day that Coqui’s mom told her they must move to los Estados Unidos. Her father was not safe in Cuba, where opinions were not allowed.
It was hard, but her family relocated and started their new life. Coqui made new friends. She learned English. She learned new sports games. But Coqui was still homesick. One thing helped; she listened to baseball games on the radio with her dad.
One day Papi surprised her with tickets for her birthday to see her favorite player, Hank Aaron. When they got to the stadium, it was very hot and there were many smells.
“Coqui,” said Papi. “Baseball is a lot like life – if you can stand the smell, you’re going to love the game.”
During the game Coqui was overjoyed to see the peanut man. He did not look like Emilio, but those warm, oily peanuts took her right back home.
This historical fiction story is heartwarming. The illustrations by Raúl Colón are wonderful. What an amazing story!
The Month of Ramadan by Inda Ahmad Zahri is a book that helps children learn about the Muslimholiday of Ramadan. Ramadan is celebrated in the 9th month of the Islamic calendar as a time of fasting from food and sinful things, a time of prayer, reflection, study, charity, and strengthening the community. During Ramadan breakfast is eaten before the sun comes up and before morning prayers. This meal is called Suhoor and consists of foods like dates, lentils, yogurt, eggs and herb tea.
During the day it is practice to fast or not to eat food, while you focus on learning gratitude, compassion, mindfulness, knowledge, love and other positive things that make a big difference in our lives and community. It is good to set aside screen time for healthy habits like helping our friends or gardening or reading.
At the end of the day the evening meal is called iftaar and then families go to mosque for tarawih prayers. Ramadan helps teach us to be grateful and to be aware of those who do not have enough. It makes you aware of kindness, strength and growth. It is good to wish someone “Ramadan Mubarak!” or “Blessed Ramadan!”
I think this picture book and the lovely illustrations explained Ramadan so easily. It was a great read!
I’m not sure I am the person to review You Broke It! by Liana Finck. Usually I would love the dry familyhumor, but I a in such a funk that the absurdity of it makes me want to scream until I got to the end where the animal child says, “I am just being myself,” and the parent gives them a hug.
The illustrations of parenting in the wild are similar to comic strips which are not my genre but they tell a story. I think the tears on my cheeks mean this message must be valid.
I checked this book out at the Longview Public Library. You can get your own copy of You Broke It! by Liana Finck on Amazon.
~
Kwesi and Nana Ruby Learn to Swim by Kobina Commeh
Kwesi and Nana Ruby Learn to Swim by Kobina Commeh is a beautiful historical fiction story illustrated by Barbara Quintino that shows how Kwesi and Nana Ruby encourage each other to learn to swim. Kwesi was very afraid to learn but he was surprised to know that Nana had never learned to swim as a child because when she had immigrated to the United States from Ghana, as a child, Black families were not allowed to use the public pools and beaches. Some White people did very mean things to make black people afraid of water, so Nana Ruby had never learned to swim.
But it is no longer unsafe to swim in public pools and Nana Ruby wanted Kwesi to learn to swim so she promised to learn, if Kwesi learned to swim. So both Kwesi and Nana Ruby worked together to learn to swim and they were able to enjoy swimming in the Lagoon Lake together too.
I love this powerful story that celebrates civil rights and I think you should too.
I have never heard of Befana before I read Yours, Befana A Letter From the Winter Witch by Barbara Cuoghi and of her I am very curious. I think I will try to find more books about her because Santa is not so interesting to me; but a wise woman who is invisible and arrives on January 6th (12 days after Christmas) and leaves presents that money can’t buy, from a woman who can’t be bought, sounds like the kind of honesty and fantasy my world needs. She also speaks to my heritage from Italy. I love the illustrations by Elenia Beretta.
The magic of winter and witches and humanity is celebrated in this book and I love it!
I really enjoyed the books I found for this blog. These books spoke to, my heritage, my love of people, my love of creativity, and my own desire to be better every day and my joy in seeing others grow too. I hope that in all the craziness of life you can find a moment to read a good book, in whatever genre you prefer, I hope it takes you on a journey that you enjoy.
I love you. Be blessed.
~
Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
When my soul cries out
she calls Him Elohim
When I looked it up it is the
Hebrew word for Creator
I was raised calling Him Jesus
but God or Father and Holy Spirit also works
I have heard Him called Yeshua
and Joshua but spoken
differently than my friend Josh’s
mother did when she named him
Because Mariam, or Mary was from Palestine
so her son would not look like us
And His name would have been spoke differently
More like a marriage between Hoe-Sway
But I imagine Great Spirit or Allah
can also put breath in our lungs
~
There are many religions and many creation stories
But most agree we must love each other Hospitality is vital because all live here
on the earth with a limit of resources
and space and air to breathe
But what we call our Creator
doesn’t really matter as long as we call Them
and say Thank You
Because gratitude is the best foundation of any day
I don’t recommend religion
The rules can’t really feed you
But in a relationship
that is where real growth can be seen
Happy New Year! Yes, I know it is late. I was really busy. I don’t remember what I was doing but I am sure it was overwhelming. Oh, yes! We have had a new president and I have been reading about politics, well, as you can see, I was overwhelmed. Well I was going to stop reading children’s books, but then I realized that was a poor choice, so now I am playing catch up and I will, indeed catch up.
So without further ado, here is 5 Books for January 2026…LOL!
~
Dreams To Ashes by Livia Blackburne
By 1871, 172 Chinese people had settled in Los Angeles because they were drawn to California for a better way of life. The stories of gold was promising, but elusive, in actuality. So these travelers made money made money by many other trades among the people who lived in The United States. Dreams To Ashes by Livia Blackburne is a nonfictionhistory account of how people from China, trying to help their families back in their homeland survived here.
White people were jealous and passed laws that took freedoms away from Chinese people. They thought Chinese people were taking jobs from white people.
On October 24, 1871 there was a gunfight between 2 gangsters and a policeman was shot. People reacted too quickly, wanting revenge. They arrived at the Chinese neighborhood and the sheriff and city marshal deputized bystanders, telling them to shoot anyone trying to escape. In the end 18 humans were killed. Only one of them was part of the original gunfight.
The same newspapers who encouraged people to hate the Chinese people, now condemned the violence. Chinese people filed suits, while other Chinese communities sent aid. 525 men were charged for the attack. 10 stood trial. No witnesses were allowed to testify. 8 men were convicted but the California Supreme Court overturned their sentences.
Legislation has come and gone. So have people and businesses. The art by Nicole Xu illustrates the truth and the hope we must keep hold of. This is a powerful story but not one that young children can probably understand. I would think this story might be best for a child of 8, middle grade, or older.
Dreams To Ashes by Livia Blackburne is a story about a real moment in United States history about a gun fight that took place on October 24, 1871, in a Chinese neighborhood, that turned into a massacre that took many lives. The imagery created by Nicole Xu is as profound as this immigration story. The lessons we can learn are still available. This story is meant for a more mature child.
Poo Pile on the Prairie by Amy Hevron is a great nonfictionnature story about how bisonpoop becomes a meal, a home, and fertilizer for so many creatures, critters, and creeping things in the meadow as the seasons change from spring, summer, autumn, and winter. The illustrations and rhythm are inspiring and I know any child who wants to talk about poop, and many of them do, will really enjoy this picture book as much, or maybe even more than I do; I didn’t even notice it was about science.
What Love Looks Like by Laura Obuobi teaches us that love looks like poetry and adventures we take in our imagination. Illustrated by works of art created by Anna Cunha, this book can take you as far as your mind can take you. This wonderful children’s book is magnificent and a wonderful way to end the day, spreading seeds for beautiful dreams. I think you should read this one. I am definitely going to buy this one for my collection.
Vision of Beauty by Kathryn Lasky is the biography history of Sarah Breedlove Walker, who might be better known as Madame CJ Walker. Sarah was born on December 23, 1867. She was the first free-born child of Minerva and Own Breedlove, and their third child. They were sharecroppers in Delt, Louisiana.
Yellow Fever, Consumption, and Cholera were common in the hot, humid towns along the Mississippi River and Sarah’s parents were not able to over come these diseases because of poor nutrition. She was an orphan by the time she was 7-years-old.
In 1904, after being inspired at the St Louis World’s Fair, Sarah prayed to God. She had seen black women with beautiful hair, and she asked God to make hers stop falling out. That night she had a dream of Africa. She saw plants, trees, flowers, and leaves. She imagined oils and other ingredients that could be used on her hair. When she awoke she began looking for these herbs, salves, different items.
She tried the products on herself until they were perfect. In 1905, she married Charles Walker and named herself Madame CJ Walker, as well as her business. Although she was poorly educated, she hired people to help her and teach her. She built a business that allowed women to sell her products and make good wages. She also invested in her culture and community.
This chapter book has wonderful pictures by Nneka Bennett and is probably appropriate for ambitious 2nd graders and up. The story itself, is inspiring for any young lady or entrepreneur.
Vision of Beauty by Kathryn Lasky is a nonfiction story about how Madame CJ Walker came from nothing and through hard word built a successful business that was able to invest into her community and help others live well. I love this story.
~
Lady of the Lines by Michaela MacCall
Sometimes you need to see proof of something that exists just because. Lady of the Lines by Michaela MacCall is a memoir about how Maria Reiche saved the Nazca Lines in Peru. These amazing large drawings in the desert, that can only be seen from a helicopter, or by Googling “Nazca Lines” were created between 500 BCE – 500 CE.
In 1941 Reiche was asked by Dr. Paul Kosok to investigate some lines that were disappearing. When she got there, Reiche bought all the brooms she could find and a box of sweet potatoes to live off of and began sweeping the years of rocks and sand that had collected on top of the lines that revealed the many shapes, some being a spider, monkey, a whale, hummingbird, a condor and many others.
These lines became Reiche’s life’s works as she had to petition government protection. She wrote a book. She made connections for structures to be build so people could view the art without disturbing the lines. This book is great for kids interested in anthropology and science. I would think third graders and up. The illustrations by Elisa Chavarri really help you connect with this story.
Lady of the Lines by Michaela MacCall is a story about how Maria Reiche saved the Nazca Lines is Peru. I had never heard of the Nazca Lines before I read this book. I think what Reiche did is amazing. What an astounding inspiration that this woman took on the preservation of this site and made it her life’s work.
When I go to the library, I don’t look for specific books. I tend to wander over to the new releases and grab a couple that grab my attention. If my wife is with me, I might let her pick a few, if she doesn’t take too long. And then I randomly wander around until I have chosen 5 – 10, depending on how many months I am searching for. It really doesn’t take very long. A couple of the books I chose were hard for me to read. Some topics are hard to read. But every book is worth reading. I guess people are like that too. But every person is important and I will take that belief with me everywhere I go.
I love you. Be blessed!
~
Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
The sky is quiet but the earth is shaking
and people are not at peace
This is called psychological frequency warfare
What you are broadcasting is creating your experience
~
Do you want to fight
Do you have to struggle
with the propaganda
being shouted from the screens
that are everywhere
~
This agitation is not cosmic
it is collective and chaos wants control Outrage, disgust and picking sides
fuels them and lowers your frequency
because low frequency people are easy to steer
~
I’m telling you we have heard this before ground yourself and drink your water
You are not here to escape earth but to stabilize it Light doesn’t fight darkness by screaming at it Body, Mind, Soul that’s the empath code
When it gets too cold
my joints curse me
and talking becomes explosive
The nerves in my face might have
taken my ability to speak but I
can still use paper and ink
This warm blanket helps me sleep
in spite of my chronic illnesses
caused by childhood traumas
~
But if I allow it this blanket will
dull my senses
It will block out the voices of
those around me
Stop me from seeing the needs
of anyone but me
Let me think that my experiences
are more important that yours
even though you wear t-shirts that say Oppressed Minority
~
You say Love is Love
but when I said we should love them too
You said I was selfish and cruel
You called me names and told me
my words were illegal
You said I wanted segregation
You told the owner on me
You suggested you might leave
so they turned on me because I am not a Xerox machine
I can’t feel the way you demand
I don’t hate you but I don’t hate them either
I also love myself and I didn’t say what you said
~
What I actually said was love
like trauma is universal
Everyone has experienced it
Maybe we could share some empathy
and work together
But what I feared is what I already knew
The people who are stuck at the far
left or the right don’t really
want change
They like their warm blankets
~
It would have meant so much
if anyone would have stood up for me while I was being attacked
and called names
when it was
in fact
you that was abusing me
You didn’t seem so fragile in that moment
But I have been the scapegoat before
and the golden child never does appear to be who they actually are
and the flying monkeys never know the role they play
They will do just about anything to keep the peace
Because that is what enablers do
~
I have been schooled on narcissists
and Honey I won’t play this game
Many White men is assholes cause they can be
They live up on they hill with the bright lights
cause they has all the money
and they stand on people like me
~
They take what they wants like its a gift
While women and children cry rape
and prisons are filled with some criminals
and people that should be free
~
They take their pictures grouped together
with they chests proud and puffed out
But the darkness shows in they eyes and policies
Sometimes they bring a women along to make you believe they lies
~
The reason a judge had to order desegregation
was sho nuf proof of evil
And hardly no fathers would send they babies
while they still wore scars of whippings and lynchings at the hands of the Invisible Empire
~
They women is working behind they backs to move forward without em
Or right there beside em because they also have felt
the whip and the rape and the holding down
They want what is promised not matter what they hafta give em
~
They tell us to hate each other the blacks, the foreigners, the transgenders
They tell us they need tax breaks
but they make me pay’m even while they cut my hours
~
They love they’s hill when the flood comes
they gets to look down on us while the shit water drowns us
and proclaim the stock market is up
so everything is fine and we should keep our chins up
~
I may not be right educated
cause they stole the school tax dollars for their fancy party
But I ain’t too stupid to know what fleecing is
I have been watching this for all of history
I have seen the 1985 interpretation of the historical fiction cinema version of The Color Purple, originally written by Alice Walker, directed by Steven Spielberg, produced by Quincy Jones, and starring actors like Oprah Winfrey several times. It always makes me cry and laugh, and cry some more. I bought this classics book several months ago, not knowing when I would be brave enough to read it. Finally it landed in my hands and I have to say that this book could not have been translated as it is, in 1985 but they did what they could. I plan to watch the 2024 version of the movie tonight. I am excited that the same team of Jones, Spielberg and Winfrey worked together again and I know now we can accept the full story about black culture, feminism and even LBGTQIA+ ways at a time that is more open-minded.
“I’m getting tired of Harpo, she say. All he think about since us married is how to make me mind. He don’t want a wife, he want a dog.” said Sofia. “I don’t like to go to bed with him no more…Used to be where he touch me I just go all out my head…Now I feels tired all the time. No interest.”
Celie said: “But I say this just to be saying something. I don’t know nothing bout it. Mr. ____ clam on top of me, do his business, in ten minutes us both sleep. Only time I feel something stirring down there is when I think about Shug.”
Sofia say: “The worst is I don’t think he notice. He git up there and enjoy himself just the same. No matter what I’m thinking. No matter what I feel. It just him. Heartfeeling don’t even seem to enter into it. The fact he can do it like that make me want to kill him.”
In this world some things can make us feel trapped. Marriage can be one of them. If you don’t know what a good one is and you don’t know you can expect more, you are stuck. In the early 1900’s women, especially black women didn’t have many options, even in fiction. Celie was uneducated and unloved by the men in her life. But between her sister, Nettie, and then by Shug, Celie learned love.
Celie said: “What God do for me?…he give me a lynched daddy, a crazy mama, a lowdown dog of a step pa and a sister I probably wont ever see again. Any how, I say, the God I been praying and writing to is a man. And act just like all the other mens I know. Trifling, forgitful and low down.”
Shug said: “The think I believe, God is inside you and inside every body else. You come into the world with God. But only them that search for it inside find it. And sometimes it just manifests itself even if you not looking, of don’t know what you looking for. Trouble do it for must folks, I think. Sorrow, Lord. Feeling like shit…Everything want to be loved…Man corrupt everything. He on your box of grits, in your head, and all over the radio. He try to make you think he everywhere. Soon as you think he everywhere, you think he God. But he aint. Whenever you trying to pray, and man plop himself on the other end of it, tell him to get lost.”
It’s funny how, everyone judged Shug but she was the one that knew the most about love. You need to read this Pulitzer Prize winning book.
The Color Purple by Alice Walker is a story of a black woman in the early 1900’s learning what can’t be taught in school. That she is loved. That she can make choices. That being honest has virtue. In fact written words can give us hope to create our future. Celie learns with the help of a few good friends that that which was taken from her, will return, if she is faithful. This story is so important for sisters, for women for people.
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
There’s a clown running around
showcasing a monument
we have held dear since the beginning
He has all but lit it on fire
but even that would be to no avail
The ringmasters have failed to to a thing
~
As he juggles the elephants and acrobats
the ringleaders clutch their pearls
make excuses or cry
Not any of them have removed him from the stage
Although they whine about it
with the trapeze artistswhile they posture
~
The tent pegs are a relic
written in 1778 with a quill
he has filled his pillow with
But sleeping in bedrooms is not
where this clown or our government
ever got its thrills met
~
Sweat equity of all kinds
especially from people of color or the female kind
are the ones we rape, pillage and take advantage of
And then we blame them for their need of protection
Because the clown is really a symptom and not the problem
Do you practice in the Spirit or in the law
Is it more important to have butts in the seats
Or do you walk in the Spirit and Truth
When you vote is it based on blind elephants
or break neck donkeys
Have you considered your neighbor or you queer child
What is most important to you
When you serve is it because they told you to
or is it what you want to do
~
I love the pretty advertisements
the memes about relationships and love
But at least 70 percent of people
in ICE detention centers are innocent
Have you tried to do anything about that
There are over 70 thousand people just rotting
over traffic violations not violent crimes
What part about the least of these
doesn’t qualify this part of human kind
~
Love is light and Jesus is full of it
but surprisingly many Christians read dark
As I become more aware of the gift I live
I have no patience for the lies we are fed
by the spiritually bankrupt and the stagnant
I have walked with God for 45 years
I enjoy reading my bible but I don’t revere it
There is not confusion where my devotion lies
If creation can’t teach you love how can I help you hear it
~
The things humans worship are futile
power, money, things to own, even our ideas
traditions, expectations, even things that hurt us
Can tear us to bits
Can induce the building of monuments
Can cause us all to pay homage to them
Can make something innocent
Deadly
Can stoke the hell fire at our feet
~
But waiting in the silence you’re afraid of
learning who you are
It is terrifying but the best cure
Once you know yourself they can’t confuse you
There is no counterfeit you’ll accept
After you’ve tasted the real truth
Fancy dresses are for models
But if you can look yourself in the eye
You can accept how God really loves you
~
Whatever you call your Creator
If you have ever constructed something into existence
you know an intimate love
That is how much you are valued
You don’t need pews, stained glass, and special garments
to know how much you are renowned
to know any praise you can give
is reciprocated
Take a breath with the breath He put in your lungs
~
Community is wonderful
Making casseroles for people
who come to you is great
Jesus said to love God with everything you have
and love your neighbor as yourself
He said that all laws fell into these
He didn’t differentiate between nations
or neighborhoods, religions, races or caste levels
He just said to love
~
You don’t have to go to church to love God
In fact the people outside the church
are the ones Jesus broke bread with and healed
People need to be loved everywhere
In fact I have had trouble finding Him
at the churches where I am greeted by computers
ready for my online giving at the door
And the guest speaker that describes
heaven as a place that is carnal when we wont have need anymore
~
When people have asked me about heaven
beyond the light of love I don’t care I am here for my Creator
I think we will all be reconciled and I don’t need any more
Please wait...
