Book Review: Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert

by Summer D Clemenson | Jun 20, 2024 | Book & Product Reviews, Opinions

My first experience with Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert was as a MP-3 that an acquaintance put on my iPod when the book first came out. I don’t generally listen audiobooks but I did enjoy the nonfiction travel biography, as read by Gilbert, herself. I saw the movie and really enjoyed it. I recently bought a copy of the book and decided it was time to read this travel memoir myself. I have gone through a lot since this contemporary autobiography was first published in 2006 and this book was fascinating.

Eat Pray Love is not an easy read, if you are a reader like I am, that really internalizes what I am reading, empathizing with the characters in the book. There is a lot that Liz goes through as she deals with the end of her marriage and then embarks on the adventure of finding herself while she travels through Italy, India and Bali in order to find what she has lost inside herself. Her search through religion and spirituality and emotional wellness through prayer among cultural experiences takes great strength. In the end Liz finds the peace she has been missing and even some romance.

I find this book to be a very powerful book to add to any collection.

I got this book from my personal collection. You can get your own copy of Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert on Amazon.

Read My Review on GoodReads:

Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

It doesn’t matter how many times you have read Eat Pray Love by Elizabeth Gilbert, you have to be ready to read it. This book is not a light read; it is a life changing read. In this nonfiction memoir Gilbert takes you through Italy, India and Bali while she discovers what she has lost in herself and if you are like me, you come with her and you change too.

This is a book you don’t just read one time. It is a book you buy and you keep it on the shelf to read as you grow in yourself so that as you find yourself at new places in your life you can go on a journey and measure once again.

View all my reviews

~

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Christian, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Christian…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

Sometimes Yesterday Is Right Now

by Summer D Clemenson | Jun 18, 2024 | About Summer, Opinions, Prayers, Queer Community, Wellness

I got triggered by Father’s Day. I didn’t realize it was Father’s Day before I went on Facebook and saw all the great posts everyone had for their dads. I write about my journey to celebrate my steps and share what I have learned with others that might benefit from my path. I have PTSD and sometimes yesterday is right now but I have new tools.

The episode didn’t actually start on Sunday but had started earlier. Pride usually reminds me of several things that make me feel loss and I work through them. I assume that most of my extended family doesn’t even realize how their actions have affected me and how my mind has created connections through Pride Month; it only makes sense to me and isn’t even fair to include them so I forgive because it isn’t anything they actually did. But the tenderness was already there when I saw the pictures of women with their dads, dancing, fishing, doing puzzles, gardening, cooking or any other relationship building activity.

The most recent reason my extended family is not in my life is that when I needed answers, no one could give me answers that made me feel peace, joy, safety and loved so I left them behind me. I never had success when I was around them so I needed to leave them. Love was not enough. It is my fault I am not in their lives. It was my choice. I do not choose to bad mouth them. They are successful with each other. I was the one that didn’t fit. I found other people that had no problem with my needs.

This truth does not erase my history. I still have PTSD. Once I realized that the emotions I was feeling were not reliable or even recent, I needed to listen to them before they leaked out on an innocent bystander. By the time I was really aware of them they were a big red ball of emotions, mostly anger and hatred toward two people. I have forgiven them so many times. These things are old. I was sitting with God, knowing that I had already forgiven these things. I knew I didn’t hold this against them anymore. My goal was peace. So I began reminding myself of what is true today: They are just people. They are not perfect. They have their own traumas. They have done the best they could. They don’t benefit from my anger and hatred.

I felt the ball of emotions begin to shift as I reminded myself that I don’t want this. I don’t benefit from these emotions anymore. I want them to do well. I want them to be blessed. I want them to have a good life. I want God to love them.

I am going to be honest. I don’t like one of them. It took me almost 30 years to be honest with myself that I hated them. I had to say that so I could forgive myself for that hatred. I don’t hate them anymore but I don’t trust them and I don’t like them and I refuse to have them in my life. It is hard to be loving toward someone you feel that way about. But removing my emotions, I know that my anger and hatred does not benefit anyone that they are around that I love. Those emotions don’t help me either.

The ball of emotions had become very manageable.

It is not always easy to forgive or pray for the people in our past. But it gets easier. It isn’t about those people that once had so much say in our lives. It is about letting them go so we can have peace.

This is a hard article to write. There is a part of me that still wants to tattle. She is many ages of Summer, but I am in control and I am a lady. I am here and I want to see my readers get well and I don’t think telling on people will make anyone feel better. In reality it never made me feel better. I think that sharing what I have learned is what actually helps me move forward.

There are many paths to wellness. For me, medication and therapy, several types, has been a life saver for me. I think everyone should see a therapist for at least a period of time in their life. We can all use more tools to help us use our words and our minds to help us process what the world throws at us. I do know, for me, I would not be here without my relationship with God. God has always turned me in the right direction and spoken truths to me when I was ready to hear them. As I leaned into Them, I learned more and especially gained that peace, joy, safety and love I was looking for.

~

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Christian, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Christian…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

I Don’t Want a Convicted Felon for My President

by Summer D Clemenson | Jun 2, 2024 | Exclaim it!, Opinions

The world was different when The United States was created. Character was more important to most people; I still aspire to know people of good character and to be a person of high integrity but as a society we have become confused so I have to actually say I don’t want a convicted felon for my president. I am sure that when the Constitution was created, the writers never thought citizens of The United States would ever vote in a convicted felon, but they never saw 2024. In order to run for president The United States Constitution states that the following must be true about the candidate:

Be a natural-born citizen of the United States
Be at least 35 years old
Have been resident of the United States for 14 years

Anyone that can prove these requirements to be true can declare their run for office. Once they have raised $5000 in campaign funds the candidate must register with the Federal Election Commission and name a principal campaign committee to raise and spend campaign funds.

I am not someone that wants to waste my time talking badly about someone. I don’t spread memes about people and I rarely talk about politics because I believe it brings out the worst in people, including me. But I do believe that DJT has proven some of the worst about our society. If you are male, white, rich, well connected and willing to do anything, you can have anything you want and never pay the consequences. I am dumbfounded by his followers.

The bible tells us what a good leader is. The bible tells us that you can’t worship money and God at the same time. Christians that are following DJT, or are being manipulated by church leaders that have been manipulated by DJT, are not reading their bibles. They are not hearing God. Church and State should be separate for a reason. Jesus did not like politics, just like He didn’t like Pharisees.

So what can you do? Whether you are a Christian or not, you can use your voice. You don’t have to be honorable to anyone or any higher power, but yourself if you don’t want a convicted felon to be your president, like I don’t.

I have sent a simple message to my House Representatives and my Senator:

We don’t have to be rude. We don’t have to put anyone down. We do have to speak and we have to keep speaking until our representatives take us seriously. We voted them in. They work for us. It might take years but we have to start somewhere.

Contact Your United States Senator at www.senate.gov/senators
Contact Your House Representative at www.house.gov/representatives

Note: You might have any easier time finding your representatives by googling more personal information but these links are a start.

Most voters think with our pocketbooks. Many of us are thinking, when we are thinking about who to vote for, if we are better off now then when we were 4 years ago and in reality, how can you gauge that? The economy is so big and there are so many aspects that go into measuring that. I don’t believe that it is fair to judge any president when it comes to the economy because in a fair market, the president can’t control price. Besides money is not the only thing to think about when it comes to choosing a president. When it comes down to it, I don’t want a convicted felon having control of our military and access to our nuclear bombs or our relationships with other countries.

If you agree with me please use the information in this article to reach out to your appropriate representatives and tell them how you feel.

5 Books for May 2024

by Summer D Clemenson | May 29, 2024 | Book & Product Reviews, Opinions

I am sort of listening to Tiffany Haddish in her interview on Colbert while I am typing up what I already wrote earlier and she is talking about her new book. I love listening to her. She is a a hoot! So her new book is called: I Curse You With Joy…I think I will have to find this book. I love how she is always changing herself because the fact that she is dynamic is what keeps her fresh. As someone who has tried several aspects of characteristics, I appreciate this about her..

I think the 5 books I read this month are like this. These books are about being strong and learning and becoming. That is what life kind of about, other than overcoming fear and learning to love…but we can talk about that later…without much ado here are our 5 Books for May 2024. (more…)

Book Review: The Ark and the Dove The Story of Noah’s Wife by Jill Eileen Smith

by Summer D Clemenson | May 20, 2024 | Book & Product Reviews, Opinions

The Ark and the Dove The Story of Noah’s Wife by Jill Eileen Smith is based on the scriptures from the bible found in Genesis 5:32 through 10:1 where we can learn about what was happening during the time of Noah and the building of the ark and what it was like to be alive on the earth at that time. The bible doesn’t give a ton of detail but Smith has obviously taken a lot of time to help us see what it would have been like to be alive during this time and how it would have been to be the wife of Noah in this historical fiction book. Zara had many responsibilities in order to support her family, her husband and the wives of her sons. It was hard to be the only family that believed in the Creator and her family was persecuted often. Zara had to be strong for them all and she worked hard to be what they needed.

It was also hard to leave behind the people they loved that didn’t choose God. I hadn’t ever thought of that before, but mourning was part of their burden as they lived in close quarters with thousands of types of animals in the ark. This story continues for generations after the flood as Noah and Zara lived to see their great-great-grandchildren. This is a beautiful Christian story. I really enjoyed it and I highly recommend this retelling of Noah’s ark.

I got this book from my sister, Jamie Holloway. You can get your own copy of The Ark and the Dove The Story of Noah’s Wife by Jill Eileen Smith on Amazon.

Read My Review on GoodReads:

The Ark and the Dove: The Story of Noah’s Wife by Jill Eileen Smith
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I have heard and read the story of Noah and the Ark many times but it was nothing like The Ark and the Dove The Story of Noah’s Wife by Jill Eileen Smith. I loved this version! It had so many details about the life of Noah and Zara and their children and the culture they lived in. This historical fiction version brought the story of Noah’s Ark to life for me and I really got a lot out of it. I have a new found appreciation for work and dedication that Noah’s family put into honoring God’s commands. I highly recommend this book!

View all my reviews

~

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Christian, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Christian…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

Book Review: The Blood of Emmett Till by Timothy B. Tyson

by Summer D Clemenson | May 13, 2024 | Book & Product Reviews, Opinions

Emmett Till was a black 14 year old boy, raised in Chicago, that had come for a visit to his great-uncle, Moses Wright’s sharecropping farm in Mississippi. Before he left Chicago, he was told by his mother to not look white people in the eye and refer to them as sir and ma’am and to be very respectful. On Sunday August 28, 1955 Moses Wright was awakened at 2 am by two white men and at least one black man. “This is Mr. Bryant,” said another white man. “We want to talk to the boy. We’re here to talk to you about that boy from Chicago, the one that done the talking up at Money.” Milan, Chapter 2

No one is entirely clear what happened at the Bryant market in Money, Mississippi. Emmett’s cousins left him alone for only a few minutes. But Mrs. Bryant felt insecure enough to get her husband’s gun out of the car and tell her husband about it when he got home. Her husband and brother-in-law were upset enough about it to kidnap Emmett and brutalize him until he finally died and then throw his body in the Tallahatchie River, where it resurfaced on Wednesday August 31, 1955.

It would not have mattered how carefully the trial would have been handled. No one was going to find Bryant and Milan guilty for the crime of killing a black person, even though he was a child; not in Mississippi.

Tyson did not only give us a picture into the murder of Emmett in this true crime history memoir but also into the culture at the time that Emmett’s biography takes place and what was happening in politics and race in Mississippi and other southern states. Only weeks before Emmett was murdered 2 black men were lynched for attempting to register black voters in the Magnolia State.

Had Mamie Bradley not immediately begun calling Chicago newspapers when she learned that her son’s body had been found, had she not insisted that his body not be buried immediately in Mississippi but be brought to Chicago and then had an open casket service, her son’s murder may have gone unnoticed. But Bradley was not going to allow her son’s death to be in vain and because of her courage and strength, her son’s death got the attention of people around the world and brought to light not only the behavior of white supremacy in the south but in the north and where complacency was probably worse than actual violent actions.

The death of Emmett Till inspired many people to work hard to gain more traction with more fair civil rights and social justice for everyone. We still have room to grow, but we have come so far. The Blood of Emmett Till by Timothy B. Tyson is an emotional and hard read at times, but it is a well written nonfiction memoir that is an important reminder of American history and the importance of loving our neighbor.

I got this book from my personal collection. You can get your own copy of The Blood of Emmett Till by Timothy B. Tyson on Amazon.

Read My Review on GoodReads:

The Blood of Emmett Till by Timothy B. Tyson
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

If you are looking for a light read, The Blood of Emmett Till by Timothy B. Tyson, is not it. But if you looking for a vital read this book does check those boxes. This nonfiction book doesn’t just explore the facts of the Emmett Till murder but also the politics and culture in the United States and especially the southern states where white supremacy was felt the loudest.

I recommend this book as an important part of any educated person’s reading list.

View all my reviews

~

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Christian, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Christian…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

The Apology

by Summer D Clemenson | May 11, 2024 | About Summer, Opinions

I have been angry for a few weeks. I knew somewhere I needed to make amends but I didn’t know where the apology was supposed to be headed until today. My sister, Jamie Holloway, sent me a link to the cover song version of “Voices Carry” sung by Kate Hudson. I really enjoyed their version but I was getting angry while hearing the words…Shush…voices carry. Shut up! Voices carry. I hate the phrase “shut up.” I wasn’t allowed to use that term growing up. I wasn’t allowed to use it but other people were allowed to tell me to shut up. Don’t tell our secrets. Don’t tell your dad this. Don’t tell your mom this. Don’t say this. Don’t say what I said…

You know what? I am done being told to not speak.

This is part of a letter I sent to someone recently. They had asked me to keep our conversations out of my blog. I told them I would use discretion. I didn’t promise I would not write about my life. I didn’t consider my poetry, where I process my emotions and some of my dreams, but they were concerned about one of my poems where they were neither named or quoted and I am not saying it was or was not about them now.

I spoke to my therapist about my letter because in the rest of the letter, for the first time, I was honest with this person about myself. I have never been honest with this person. I have known them my whole life and never been honest with them because when I have been, I hurt them and their idea of me and they wont go to therapy. I don’t want them to not have someone to go to, who can explain to them that I don’t hate them, but I have to be free to be myself and to protect myself too.

You know what he told me? He told me that sometimes we need to talk and write about what happened to us. He told me that if anyone didn’t like what I had to write, they were free to not read it. If anyone asked them about my blog they were free to tell anyone they knew that they choose to not read it.

It made sense to me. I don’t choose to read much about Trump. I don’t choose to say much about him. When asked about him, I say, I don’t choose to read or speak about Trump. Why? Because the first two years of his presidency I couldn’t say President Trump without having an anxiety attack. I avoided Twitter, yet I couldn’t turn on the news without the press telling what he tweeted. He loves chaos and I hate it, so I avoid him.

If what I write bothers you. Don’t read it or talk about it.

This aligns with the bible too. God tells us that until we let the light of truth in we can’t heal. I have been in the dark for a long time and I am getting used to holding my wounds in the light where they can be healed by truth.

I owe a big apology to myself. I am sorry Summer. I have let people keep you quiet, when you didn’t want to be; sometimes when it hurt you to be quiet. I have let other people stifle you from sharing some of your healthy thoughts, and good habits. I have let others abuse you with your own silence. I don’t just share my life here to show off that my brain is healing and that I am growing, although I am very proud of that. I am hoping to get the attention of other emotional abuse survivors who need to know that it is ok to mess up. It is ok to speak. It is ok to try. It is ok to fail. It is ok to leave. It is ok to do what you have to do to get better. You don’t have to let people hurt you just because that is the way we have always done it. It is ok to expect change before reconciliation. It is ok to not want reconciliation. It is ok to not be sorry for telling the truth and say YOU ARE NEVER GOING TO GET AN APOLOGY FROM ME FOR WHAT YOU DID TO ME.

I have a great life because I expect authenticity and the attempt at wellness from the people in my life. I am done with chaos. I have found my voice.

~

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Christian, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Christian…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

But God

by Summer D Clemenson | May 9, 2024 | Poetry, Prayers, Queer Community

It was supposed to be warm and sunny today
but in my dream it was snowing
The silence was not available because
you were there to judge as always
You hate me because I am gay
I wanted to call you a slut
because the man you are married to
is not your first
but he is a preacher so his degree frees your tongue
You forget we have all fallen short
and require the grace of God

~

I left you because my tears were starting to freeze on my face
because I loved you best

~

Guarding the door
you stood with your rocks and knives
they all had collected for you
You threw a couple but
I slipped in another door
I know you hate yourself and me
but I don’t know why

~

You were tending you wounds
while your mother told lies and smoked cigarettes
and put them out in her daughter’s arm
If you could get away
If you could get away

~

I was supposed to go to school
but I didn’t know which box in the garage was mine
I had missed so many days I was overwhelmed
by what it might take to catch up
I have always been left behind
but God

~

God woke me from the nightmare
He chose me and loved me
He showed me that He was always with me
and with you
and I didn’t have to live in your house
to love you
He made boundaries because I am human
I am not God
I have limits
But I can pray and I don’t have to judge
in response to yours
I can love from my place in Him

~

Lack of Self-Discipline Betrays Passions

by Summer D Clemenson | May 2, 2024 | Opinions, Prayers

College is a time when we are supposed to learn to think. We often learn more about ourselves and figure out where we stand politically. For many of us, it is the first time we see ourselves separately from our families enough to be able to decide where we stand on a lot of issues. Protests are normal on campuses. Right now, campuses are seeing a lot of unrest and causing clashes with police and shut down classes. Some of the incidents are anti-semitic. Some students want their college to cut ties with any businesses that are profiting off the war with Hamas. Many students want to see a ceasefire between Israel and Palestine.

The problem we have with these protests, is not that they are happening. The United States was created because we protested the way we were being treated by England. It is the foundation of who we are to protest when we see something we want to see changed, to say something, but we are not leaving room for others to disagree peacefully. We are not remaining noncombatant. That is where the police have the right to come in and arrest people. That is where injuries happen. Violence has become the expectation.

The sad part is that it is not just college students that are vandalizing college campuses and endangering people that intend to be peaceful. Many times outside groups are showing up and changing the dynamics of these protests.

Lack of self-discipline betrays passions.

This is where I try to live, but I can’t say that I understand the world I live in. I read The Old Testament and I can’t say I understand it completely clearly either. God is very different before Jesus came to offer grace and salvation.

I have read a lot about the war in Gaza. I don’t understand what it must be like to live in the Middle East. Even when war is ceased, it could happen at any moment. The unrest must be stifling. There are whole groups of people that do not accept that Jesus is the Son of God and they are still held to the standards of the laws in The Torah, or The Old Testament, as I know it. Those standards are impossible and that is why God sent Jesus for anyone that would accept Him. This is easy for me to accept, because that is what I have believed for most of my life, but there are people in Israel that only live by The Torah, in fact, their only job, to study The Torah.

The expectations of their life must be so different than mine. There are some great stories in The Old Testament, but there is a lot of war and lamenting and law in there too.

I have made no opinions about this war because I have nothing to base my opinion on. The people in Israel live such a different life than I do. They have different expectations, beliefs and purposes than I do. The government in Palestine is not strong, they have allowed Hamas to take over and keep them in destitution and control their people. Israel does not want to control them but they don’t want to be terrorized by them either and both countries share religious sites but access is not permitted. There is no peace and no one to lead them to peace. Historically they are brothers but they hate each other.

A long time ago I made peace with the concept that I will never be able to understand everything about God. It is easy for me to file some things under this belief. But I am still concerned because death of innocents is always sad. Pointing fingers always ends up back in my direction because judging does that. So following the money will bring us home and that makes me feel sick.

All I can do is pray. I do know, and I apply this belief in more than one scenario, that God loves His creation. He loves each of us and we are never without Him. I know that He is with us and comforts us to the end so even though it hurts my heart to hear of the deaths of civilians and the mourning of families, I know that God is there too. Because He knew that when he created humans He knew that our lack of self-discipline would always betray our passions.

Book Review: Greenlights by Matthew McConaughey

by Summer D Clemenson | May 1, 2024 | Book & Product Reviews, Opinions

I have always enjoyed Matthew McConaughey in movies and interviews. I have always been able to see that he is authentic and wise. Greenlights by Matthew McConaughey is a autobiography that showcases how he has gotten to be that way. He is honest with himself and with the readers. McConaughey is an inspiration in all his art.

If I were to be critical of anything about the biography memoir, it is a creative effort to use McConaughey’s handwritten thoughts to make this nonfiction book more interesting. My only problem with it is that the writing is so small that it is very hard to read. I love the poetry throughout the book and the pictures and the layout.

I got this book from my personal collection. You can get your own copy of Greenlights by Matthew McConaughey on Amazon.

Read My Review on GoodReads:

Greenlights by Matthew McConaughey
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I needed to read this book. I bought it several months ago but it fell into my hands when I needed some inspiration and inspiration I found. Greenlights by Matthew McConaughey is a nonfiction autobiography memoir that is filled with real life. McConaughey does not sugar coat anything but he also finds the ray of light in all situations and that is how he keeps moving forward and challenges himself towards excellence.

Raised in Texas, he wanted to be a lawyer until he had studied long enough to find his true calling of being an actor. He has been writing all his life. Travel was important to him and helped him cultivate his humanitarian outlook. This biography showcases McConaughey’s true art; life. This book is a must read.

View all my reviews

~

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Christian, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Christian…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

In My Prayers You Will Stay

by Summer D Clemenson | Apr 29, 2024 | About Summer, Poetry

I am not afraid of the Spirit within me
I am not afraid of my emotions or memories
that cause physical sensations deep in my muscles
that remind me where I have been
and how far I have come
But I am afraid you will never see or hear who I really am

~

You offered me a gift with
no strings attached
I didn’t say anything about the strings that have always been there
So you must be confessing that
You don’t give anything freely

~

I read somewhere that
when you love someone you want the best for them
when you are attached to them you want what you can get out of them
I don’t have anything else to give you
But when I think of you
I ask God to give you your heart’s desire

~

I don’t want to find you guilty anymore
but you are the one that abused me
You taught your children to treat me like your slave
You are the one that shunned relationship first
There are many reasons I can’t trust you

~

But I still love you
So in my prayers you will stay

~

Note: These flowers don’t have anything to do with this poem but they are pretty and should be remembered. My wife, Karen G Clemenson’s coworkers gave them to her while she was recovering from her hysterectomy.

~

Book Review: Finding the Mother Tree Discovering the Wisdom of the Forest by Suzanne Simard

by Summer D Clemenson | Apr 26, 2024 | Book & Product Reviews, Opinions

I just finished a biography about a woman scientist and I loved it. I was never good at science. But Finding the Mother Tree Discovering the Wisdom of the Forest by Suzanne Simard kept me engaged. I think it is because she loves the trees so much. She was taught to love nature by her people, her family, that love the trees. I love trees too and I can feel a connection with them when I am with them and I could feel that she knows what I feel when I am with the forest.

You don’t have to have a degree in biology to understand this book and I love that Simard explains the science part well enough that anyone could follow. She shares about her family lineage while she tells about her studies in both Canada and the United States, learning about ecology and the environment and different ways to help the trees grow stronger and healthier. Her activism and feminism comes naturally because she comes from strong and capable women and she wants to portray that to her two daughters she is raising in this nonfiction book.

In the end of the book, she has proven that we are all connected. We are connected with each other, with the animals and the plants; something the Native people, that are very prominent in Canada have been trying to teach for years. This is something that I have been learning a lot about too. I can feel this as my beloved cat is coming to the end of his path and I can feel him separating from me. What timing to finish this book. I wonder if I would have read this book a few years ago if I would have felt different.

I have really enjoyed this book. Simard has a very wonderful way of being open in her writing and it was easy to connect. I highly recommend this book.

I got this book from my sister, Jamie Holloway. You can get your own copy of Finding the Mother Tree Discovering the Wisdom of the Forest by Suzanne Simard on Amazon.

Read My Review on GoodReads:

Finding the Mother Tree: Discovering the Wisdom of the Forest by Suzanne Simard
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Finding the Mother Tree Discovering the Wisdom of the Forest by Suzanne Simard is an amazing biography by a woman that shares her family, her belief in activism, science, feminism, her love for the environment and nature and science. Simard studied biology in both Canada and the United States, but did most of her work in Canada, where she has lived most of her life. This nonfiction book teaches that ecology as well as spirituality proves that we are all connected and Simard’s life’s work has proved with science that this is so. I highly recommend this book.

View all my reviews

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Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Christian, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Christian…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

I Know God is Carrying Me

by Summer D Clemenson | Apr 25, 2024 | About Summer, Cancer, Opinions

I am so tired and I know God is carrying me. Most of the time my prayers are: God please help. Not only for myself but when I see what is going on in the world. I am not the only one that is overwhelmed. It is hard to think about the wars in the world and the children being killed or kidnapped and the families being hurt and people who are sick when you, yourself are so overwhelmed. But God is good and He knows our struggles. He is good at answering: God please help.

In November when Karen G Clemenson got sick, I was in shock. She doesn’t get sick. I am the sick one. But we ended up at the hospital twice and found out she had a baseball sized tumor behind her right ovary. She didn’t have health insurance. Her state insurance had just been canceled and she hadn’t had time to start the process of signing up through her work. The process to get all the coverage took much longer than the few days we were promised and 6 months later we are still working on the dental plan. But besides the $15,000 bill from the ER, she is covered for her medical and we area grateful.

My dental insurance only covers cleanings and diagnostics and I had a bad dentist that told me my impacted wisdom teeth were no big deal. My new dentist has said other things. Like one of my molars was dead and had to be removed and I have to have the impacted wisdom teeth out and I have another 2 teeth that need fillings, one specifically because of another impacted wisdom tooth. Karen’s dental insurance, if we could get it to settle, would cover these things but it has taken so long that my bad molar broke. So we went in to have it removed two weeks ago and gave them the insurance and are waiting to see if they will cover any of it. Of course my mouth is still healing and it is hard to get used to my new mouth.

Meanwhile Xavier got really sick and needed a lot of care and finally I knew this wasn’t just a flare and we took him to see Dr Katie, who confirmed that it was best to help him go to Jesus, which I wrote about in RIP Xavier. I never really had time to even mourn because the next day we had to prepare for Karen’s surgery.

Yesterday, we were so thankful that our friend,Jho, picked us up at 4 am to take us to PeaceHealth Southwest Washington for Karen’s robotic hysterectomy. I was so thankful when Dr Rushing called me to tell me that she did really well in the surgery and he was confident that her tumor was benign. He felt that she would be able to leave in 4 hours, once she had had another blood test. When you have a surgery like this you have to have another blood test 4 hours after the surgery to make sure you aren’t losing blood. Her test turned out well.

The other thing that can happen after this type of procedure is that you have trouble urinating. The trauma in that area can cause things to freeze up for some women and Karen is one of them. Karen did not get to go home 4 hour later. In fact she ended up staying all night and finally being sent home with a catheter. We are hoping her primary can remove it tomorrow so she doesn’t have to go back to Vancouver tomorrow.

As I am writing this I heard a soft voice of my wife, saying she misses our boy. I do too.

I am flaring up. My body does not handle stress well at all. Since I have an IUD as part of my cancer treatment, I don’t have periods but when I am totally on tilt, I spot. I have been spotting. I have sores in my mouth. My body hurts more than usual. My appetite is scarce. I feel defensive.

But I know that God hears: God please help.

One little blessing is this plant start. On the day that Xavier (pronounced like Javier) went to Jesus, one of Karen’s coworkers gave us a start to a praying hands plant. I had been thinking I should get a plant. I have named her Xavier (pronounced the traditional way) Elizabeth.

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Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Christian, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Christian…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

RIP Xavier

by Summer D Clemenson | Apr 23, 2024 | About Summer, Opinions

I knew Xavier was sick and would probably need to go to Jesus when we took him to see Dr Katie yesterday. I had known it was different this time. His IBS flares usually only lasted a week but no more. He never stopped eating longer than a day or two. I heard myself saying to myself that I needed to hold him as long as he would let me because there would come a day I could not hold him anymore. I didn’t usually take pictures of him and me but I felt like I needed a picture with him because our time was coming to an end. When Karen G Clemenson got this flood of hope, yesterday morning, that it was only another mouth infection and we would just get some antibiotics and he would get better, I wanted to agree with her, but I knew it was not so.

I had cried so many tears already. Xavier was fastidious with his grooming and he was a compulsive eater and he had quit both of these things 2 weeks ago. He was drinking a lot of water and still using his litter box but he wouldn’t touch his food or take his probiotic, which he used to love. He still had loose stools and dry heaves. But he was trying to be positive for us.

He would purr when I came into the room or when I read out loud. He loved to hear me read my bible out loud. Even though he wasn’t jumping up to lick the ink on my notebook pages anymore, I could hear him purring from under the bed, yesterday morning. If he was in the bathtub, his other favorite spot, he would always say hello to us when we came in.

Xavier was born on September 10, 2008. I met him 8 weeks later while visiting a church. He was a different kind of cat. He was stimulated very easily and more anxious than most cats. I knew if I didn’t get him a companion while he was a kitten, I would not be able to have another animal but it just didn’t work out, and he proved me right. Xavier did not understand how to play with other animals. He was terrified of most people and animals. He was a biter and it took a toll on me. I prayed a lot about how to handle this high strung ball of fluff and God told me how to give him his space and pay attention to his very small cues. Xavier helped me understand things about myself and he became the perfect emotional support animal for me.

It took at least 2 months for Xavier to accept Karen but they build the cutest relationship. He had very little patience for her constant movements and noises but eventually he learned to dance with her (literally). He never let Karen hold him. That is something only I was allowed to do. But Karen was the only one allowed to give him kisses. When he was well, he would make sure she got up with her alarms for work and walk her to the door when she left. If she was late he would pace and worry until she came home. I was the nurturer so I got out of the way and let Karen be the fun mom and it was great.

Xavier was very opinionated like me. In fact, Karen often said he was just like me. She thought it was hilarious to watch us fight; we both have very bad tempers, although it usually takes a lot to get us angry. He had learned my facial expressions which was so odd to see in a cat’s face. He loved jazz and piano music. His favorite essential oils were doTERRA’s On Guard and Frankincense. He refused to drink standing water and was often found in the bathtub; he could even get water out of a faucet that wasn’t turned on. He would not eat any other food other than his hard prescription food, although as he got older he learned to like to share a few licks of my tapioca pudding. He hated when we sang; he even slapped Karen for singing when she was too close to him once…we both laughed at that one!

Xavier was not an easy animal. He made me work but he also helped me a lot. While I was going through the toughest time of my mental illness and chronic illness he reminded me to take my meds, he encouraged me to do my workouts, sometimes he was the reason I got out of bed because he demanded that things were done a certain way. Now that my brain is more healed and I have established some good habits I know I couldn’t have done it without him because he learned to do what Karen did, while she was at work and he did it.

This weekend I told him that I knew he was sick. I told him that I wanted him to get better but that if he needed to go, I understood. Every time he saw me he would purr. I know he was telling me he loved me. Yesterday when it was time to go to see Dr Katie, he wouldn’t come out from under the bed so I had to move the bed to get him and he purred when he saw me. I had told him the night before that we were going to see Dr Katie and she was going to help him. I scooped him up and we went to the bathroom to get a drink before we went. I wanted to believe Karen that it was just a mouth infection but the pain I had been feeling for days was too real. I brought him out and let Karen love on him a bit before he went into his carrier and unlike usual, he purred the entire way to the vet.

After she examined him, Dr Katie explained that Xavier had signs of kidney or liver issues or possibly cancer. He was 15 and a 1/2 years old and it was the right thing to do to let him go. He was agreeable the entire time. He knew we were helping him. He went to sleep peacefully in my arms before Dr Katie gave him the injection that put him to sleep forever. His heart stopped right after I said: I love you Xavier. You are my good boy kitty…Like I always told him…

Xavier Rock’On Clemenson died on Monday April 22, 2024 but he lives in our hearts forever. RIP Xavier.

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Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Christian, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Christian…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

5 Books for April 2024

by Summer D Clemenson | Apr 22, 2024 | Book & Product Reviews, Opinions

Happy April! I have been enjoying working on rebuilding my children’s book collection so for the next few months we will be exploring some of my own books. I have really loved going through my favorite books and remembering reading them to the children I have loved.

Do you have any favorite books you have read your little ones? Or any books you remember someone reading to you? Please feel free to share them with me.

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Harold and the Purple Crayon by Crockett Johnson

Harold and the Purple Crayon by Crockett Johnson
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Harold is an inquisitive child with bright eyes and a big purple crayon. While we read Harold and the Purple Crayon by Crockett Johnson we are taken on an adventure of art in the moonlight in this fiction storybook.

As Harold guides us along, he draws what he imagines in this endearing children’s picture book. We are taken over land and sea and even in a hot air balloon while Harold envisions his fantasy, until he gets tired and wants to go home to bed and he draws that too. Since 1955, Harold has been entertaining children, and I am positive this classic will continue for years to come.

I got this book from my personal collection. You can get your own copy of Harold and the Purple Crayon by Crockett Johnson on Amazon.

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Corduroy by Don Freeman

Corduroy by Don Freeman
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Although Corduroy is just a teddy bear in a fantasy, he sure seems like a real creature that anyone could relate to. I guess that is why this classic, Corduroy by Don Freeman, has been a storybook enjoyed by families since 1968.

Corduroy is a sweet little bear that lives in a toy store with other animals and has the ability to find himself on adventures. In the end he gets a new friend, Lisa, a new home, and his overalls are mended. This children’s fiction picture book is a must read for any family collection.

I got this book from my personal collection. You can get your own copy of Corduroy by Don Freeman on Amazon.

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Curious George Gets a Medal by H.A. Rey

Curious George Gets a Medal by H.A. Rey
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

In the classic book, Curious George Gets a Medal by H.A. Rey we meet a very precocious monkey named George. All the schemes in this storybook start out innocently enough, but become outrageous and humorous and since he is so lovable, everyone cheers. Even though George floods the house, steels a cow and destroys an art exhibit, George also saves the day by becoming the first space monkey and receives a medal of honor and the whole town celebrates with him, including the animals!

This children’s fiction picture book is a riot and sure to keep a smile on your face while you enjoy George and his fantasy adventures. This book has been entertaining families since 1957, but I am sure George will be a family favorite for years to come.

I got this book from my own personal collection. You can get your own copy of Curious George Gets a Medal by H.A. Rey on Amazon.

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Rough Weather Ahead for Walter the Farting Dog by William Kotzwinkie, Glenn Murray and Elizabeth Gundy

Rough Weather Ahead for Walter the Farting Dog by William Kotzwinkle
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I have to admit, I have heard about Walter the Farting Dog, but I am not sure I have read any of the books before. I bought this book with my great-nephews in mind and I am hooked! Rough Weather Ahead for Walter the Farting Dog by William Kotzwinkle, Glenn Murray and Elizabeth Gundy is a wonderful family storybook. Walter’s family is amazing! They love their dog even though he can clear a room and even melt the ice on butterfly wings!

The illustrations by Audry Colman really adds to the enjoyment and humor of this fiction children’s picture book! I think you really should grab a copy for yourself and have a good heart-warming laugh. Humor and animals sometimes go hand in hand and why not during story time?

I got this book from my personal collection. You can get your own copy of Rough Weather Ahead for Walter the Farting Dog by William Kotzwinkle, Glenn Murray and Elizabeth Gundy on Amazon.

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Dragons Love Tacos by Adam Rubin

Dragons Love Tacos by Adam Rubin
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Dragons Love Tacos by Adam Rubin is a very cute children’s fiction storybook. If you want to learn about Dragons and how much they love tacos and how they like to eat them, this is the book for you! The illustrations by Daniel Salmieri are colorful and really add to this picture book.

I think this book would be a great conversation starter with children about different kinds of animals, foods and colors. Who doesn’t like to dream about fantasy characters eating their favorite foods while making it humorous? What a great story time opportunity!

View all my reviews

I got this book out of my personal collection. You can get your own copy of Dragons Love Tacos by Adam Rubin on Amazon.

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Thank you for enjoying my book reviews

I hope you take the time to check these books out for yourself.

Reading to children is such a treat! They are so easily amused and they are so inquisitive. It is fun to watch them get curious and laugh at the funniest things. I encourage you to read to the little ones in your life. You won’t regret it.

Be blessed.

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Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Christian, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Christian…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

Help Jamie Holloway Communicate

by Summer D Clemenson | Apr 18, 2024 | Local Interests, Opinions, Thanksgiving

Most of you know my sister,Jamie Holloway. I mention her all the time. She is my best friend and my adopted sister. She is a huge inspiration to me and so many other people because of her strength and her drive to live as well as she can with some pretty scary chronic illnesses. If it wasn’t for her I would be miserable and not know what to do about it. But she chooses joy as much as she can. She chooses wellness and pro-activity as often as possible. She educates herself and those around her, every chance she gets.

When you are chronically ill and can’t work, it is hard to make ends meet. I am lucky that I have a hard working wife. I am lucky that we are able to make Jamie part of our monthly budget because she doesn’t have much left after her rent is paid. Jamie is lucky that there are a few of us that make up her team that keep things going but it is hard when things like her laptop or cell phone die. We are all managing our budgets.

Jamie is needing some help with her electronics. If you can help with a few dollars, towards these things it would bring so much happiness to her, just in time for her birthday May 21st. We are asking for $1000 to cover the cost of her communication devices and maybe a shelf for her bedroom wall. If we all pitch in, she will be one happy 50 year old!

Please click to learn more about the GoFundMe we set up for her.

When she gets her new laptop, I might have to give her blog at JamieChasesButterflies.com a facelift…she looks a lot different now. 🙂

Thank you for loving Jamie!

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Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Christian, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Christian…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

Book Review: Hungry Ghosts by Kevin Jared Hosein

by Summer D Clemenson | Apr 3, 2024 | Book & Product Reviews, Opinions

Hungry Ghosts by Kevin Jared Hosein is a literary fiction book that takes place in Trinidad in the 1940’s. Hosein takes the first few chapters of this novel to help you realize the vast difference between the classes of people, especially our main characters. Hans and Shweta Saroop and their son, Krishna, who live in a barrack, made of wood and tin, with several other families. The walls are thin, there is little privacy and they all share one latrine. And on what can seem like, the other end of the world, are Dalton and Marlee Changoor that own a large farm in Bell Village.

This historical fiction story is filled with mystery, spirituality and all kinds of adventure as Krishna and his friends deal with the bullies at school and growing up. Hosein successfully paints a picture of generational trauma and linked histories. He also reminds us that sometimes it is better to want what we have.

This thriller has taken me everywhere emotionally and was rich with information about a place I will probably never visit.

I got this book from my sister, Jamie Holloway. You can get your own copy of Hungry Ghosts by Kevin Jared Hosein on Amazon.

Read My Review on GoodReads:

Hungry Ghosts by Kevin Jared Hosein
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Hungry Ghosts by Kevin Jared Hosein is about people that work hard but enjoy their life. That is, until Hans, the head of the Saroop family gets the chance to work as night watchman at the Changoor farm while Dalton Changoor is away. Hans doesn’t know that Dalton is probably dead. He also doesn’t know that Marlee Changoor has been admiring him while he works on her property during the day.

Hans looks at this this opportunity as the one his family needs to get the money they need to buy land in Bell Village and get away from the barracks they have been living in and have a better life. But soon he is lured inside the big house. He enjoys the fancy food, the nice music, the beautiful furniture and most sadly, Mrs. Changoor.

This break in the Saroop family causes a domino effect in the rest of the novel based in 1940’s Trinidad.

View all my reviews

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Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Christian, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Christian…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

5 Books for March 2024

by Summer D Clemenson | Apr 2, 2024 | Book & Product Reviews, Opinions

I do know that I am at least 3 days late with this article but I do believe that wonderful things can happen in only 3 days…which is why so many people celebrate Resurrection Sunday. In reality my family was really busy in the month of March which is why I am late but the books I chose for this month were really great and worth the wait.

I am wondering, did you ever get a chance to check out any of the other books I have reviewed? Let me know!

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Just You and Me by Jennifer Ward

Just You and Me: Remarkable Relationships in the Wild by Jennifer Ward
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Just You and Me by Jennifer Ward is a nonfiction book about symbiotic relationships in nature, on land and in the sea. These relationships have been created by what seems to be unlikely animal friends but they have learned to work together to take care of each other.

For instance a Nile crocodile can’t clean their own teeth so they allow an Egyptian plover bird to hop, safely into their mouth to eat the leftover food in their teeth and gums. The crocodile gets a clean mouth and the bird gets a full belly.

The colorful illustrations by Alexander Vidal add great interest in this picture book and help showcase the relationships of these unlikely friends. I think they also make for great conversations starters for children and grownups alike.

I got this book from the Longview Public Library. You can get your own copy of Just You and Me by Jennifer Ward on Amazon.

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Homeless by Bernard Wolf

Homeless by Bernard Wolf
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Homeless by Bernard Wolf is a very touching nonfiction story told in the voice of Mikey, an 8-year-old boy. Mikey and his family are homeless and are living in a very hard and real scenario. This book was published in 1995, but there are still a lot of similar stories like Mikey’s

I don’t think this book is meant for very young children because they just won’t have the attention span, but for children 7 and older, I think this would be a powerful way to help children learn to empathize with people experiencing homelessness.

Wolf didn’t just write this biography, he also showcased the story with powerful photography that illustrated the family’s life. Both the writing and photography help to illustrate the difficulties of families that need help.

I got this book from the Longview Public Library. You can get your own copy of Homeless by Bernard Wolf on Amazon.

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Rabbit and Squirrel A Tale of War and Peas by Kara LaReau

Rabbit & Squirrel: A Tale of War and Peas by Kara LaReau
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

The illustrations by Scott Magoon are adorable. This is my favorite thing about the picture book Rabbit and Squirrel A Tale of War and Peas by Kara LaReau. I really wanted to love this book but the animal characters: Rabbit and Squirrel loved gardening but never tried to share their produce. They were quick to judge each other and when the farmer kicked them out of their garden, they continued to blame each other.

The thought of them getting sick of blaming each other and growing a garden together is not enough for me. I realize this is a fiction book but I want a better moral to the story, not just for me but for the children that would be inspired by this book. I will be choosing a different book for storytime at my house.

I got this book from the Longview Public Library. You can get your own copy of Rabbit and Squirrel A Tale of War and Peas by Kara LaReau on Amazon.

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Corduroy Takes a Bow by Viola Davis

Corduroy Takes a Bow by Viola Davis
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I haven’t read about Corduroy for years but I have already ordered Corduroy and A Pocket for Corduroy by Don Freeman, the original creator of this fiction series, for my personal children’s book collection. These books will be in my next review. I so enjoyed Corduroy Takes a Bow by Viola Davis and it is in my shopping cart right now!

Lisa and her mother have gone to the theater for the first time. They are excited to see Mother Goose and of course Lisa has brought along her teddy bear, Corduroy. In true form, Corduroy has found a way to have an animal adventure while at the theater but still make it back into Lisa’s arms.

I love the illustrations by Jody Wheeler for this picture book. I love that both Davis and Wheeler stayed faithful to the original character of Corduroy, who is always lovable and heartwarming.

I got this book from the Longview Public Library. You can get your own copy of Corduroy Takes a Bow by Viola Davis on Amazon.

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Fred’s Big Feelings The Life and Legacy of Mister Rogers by Laura Renauld

Fred’s Big Feelings: The Life and Legacy of Mister Rogers by Laura Renauld
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I loved Mr. Rogers Neighborhood all my life. I would still watch reruns if I could find them. Mr. Rogers knew how to talk so I could understand my emotions and good ways to express them. Fred’s Big Feelings The Life and Legacy of Mister Rogers by Laura Renauld is a very children’s-sized version of another nonfiction biography I have read and reviewed: The Good Neighbor The Life and Work of Fred Rogers by Maxwell King.

I am not sure a young child would have the attention span for this book because of the amount of history in it, but a child of 7 and up would appreciate this book. Especially the parts that talk about Mr. Rogers as a child. Parents will appreciate knowing how much time Mr. Rogers studied mental health as part of his spirituality journey so that he could project honesty and care into all of his programming. The illustrations by Brigitte Barrager add a lot to this picture book as well.

View all my reviews

I got this book from the Longview Public Library. You can get your own copy of Fred’s Big Feelings The Life and Legacy of Mister Rogers by Laura Renauld on Amazon.

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I really enjoyed the books I found for March. Reading children’s books has become something I am really enjoying and collecting them for the children in my life is become a small hobby that makes me happy as well.

What are some things that bring you joy?

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Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Christian, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Christian…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

Book Review: Killers of the Flower Moon The Osage Murders and the Birth of the FBI by David Grann

by Summer D Clemenson | Mar 22, 2024 | Book & Product Reviews, Opinions

I had seen previews for the movie Killers of the Flower Moon and meant to see it and then forgot about it. Then one night I saw Martin Scorsese on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert and really enjoyed his interview and I was reminded that I wanted to make time to see this movie and then forgot about it again. Then one day I was at the library with my wife, Karen G Clemenson, looking for books and I found Killers of the Flower Moon in the juvenile section while picking out books for my 5 Books for February 2024 article and I decided to grab it.

When I went up to check out my books I told the librarian I was surprised to find this book in the children’s section and she pointed out that this was a book edited for children and wanted to know if I still wanted it. Since the book my wife wanted, was not available and she was going to place a hold on it for us, I asked her to do the same for the adult version of Killers of the Flower Moon The Osage Murders and the Birth of the FBI by David Grann.

First off my impression of the book, based on what I had not really paid attention to in the previews for the movie needed to be thrown out the window. This is not a love story between a white man and an Osage woman. This is a true crime nonfiction story that really happened. This book is about how crooked White officials took advantage of Osage Natives, that had head rights to a lot of oil, in any way they could. Many times that meant murdering them and not investigating anything. Eventually a group out of Virginia, with the largest fingerprint database, and a little bit of training got wind of things and took over to finally find some justice for some of the lost people in Gray Horse, Oklahoma. This group became the FBI.

The story, itself is a little choppy. The details are a bit overwhelming. But the memories must not be lost. We must honor the victims and celebrate where we have gotten better.

I got this book from the Longview Public Library. You can get your own copy of Killers of the Flower Moon The Osage Murders and the Birth of the FBI by David Grann on Amazon.

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Killers of the Flower Moon: The Osage Murders and the Birth of the FBI by David Grann
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Killers of the Flower Moon The Osage Murders and the Birth of the FBI by David Grann was an important read. It was a hard read for someone that doesn’t read true crime stories. But this nonfiction book tells an compelling story in history that is vital, not only to Native American and United States history, but the creation of a policing organization that was necessary when all others were uneducated, corrupt and unable to bring justice to families that had lost so much. You should read this book.

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~

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My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Christian, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Christian…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

I Want My Life to be Less Transactional

by Summer D Clemenson | Mar 15, 2024 | Opinions, Prayers

According to the Cambridge Dictionary, the word, transactional, is an adjective that describes something that is related to buying and selling. For instance, transactional charges are fees that are associated with their purchase. Transactional can also be associated with relationships and this happens when each person in the relationship does things for the other person, expecting something done for them in return. As long as they get something in return, they are willing to give their time and resources at some point in the future. Transactional relationships are very beneficial at work, where you are earning your pay, but in more personal relationships, often times, if this is the main type of dynamic in your relationship, there is little room for meaningful connection. I want my life to be less transactional.

I was doing my bible study and this verse made me think of a time I was in Seattle with my father. We were on the pier. There were lots of vendors and we were on our way to somewhere, I don’t remember. There was a homeless man that wanted my father to say hello to him, but he ignored him. This made him angry. As my entire family followed my father and walked by him, I could feel his shame and anger get bigger. I could feel that so big. I was one of the last in the line of my extended family and as I came closer to him, I smiled at him and said hello. Immediately, he calmed down and smiled back.

When we were closer to the car, my father began berating me for speaking to the man. But I wouldn’t be put in my place. I put my father in his place. I was firm. I told him, he was wrong. All that man wanted was easy to give. He wanted to be seen, and I saw him.

I understand that my father was afraid of what the man could have done. But I was not. I knew Jesus was with me. I have come to understand that there were many things in my life that my extended family was not strong enough to walk through with me and it was better to let them go. Their fears only made it harder for me to be brave.

But there was more. The love I was raised with was more transactional than natural. If I was the good girl that served them, I was allowed some grace. But their grace only lasted as long as they wanted. My parents needed their needs met more than they knew how to take care of mine and they expected me to take care of them first.

The disadvantages of transactional relationships are:

Shallow interaction
Feeling undervalued
Short-sighted with little loyalty and commitment
Lack of safety

When I tried to talk about these things with my father, I was told that I was the only one with the problem so I was the problem. When I tried to talk to my mother, I was told that it wasn’t true and I was making this up. I had seen my aunt do this to my mother, while I was growing up too. Because I had been the one to have to care for my sisters, starting at 9 years old, I did not have a regular relationship with them. They had been taught by my parents to emotionally abuse me. I didn’t have any support and so they got the absolute worst of me. Now I know I had mental illness, neurodivergence, untreated chronic migraines, unbalanced hormones, insulin resistance and maybe even the beginning of fibromyalgia at a young age, I was a mess and I was trying to be a good girl with no help. I don’t blame my family for this. We didn’t have the words for these conditions back when I was growing up but compassion would have been nice, even when I started getting diagnosed and that never happened.

The most joy I ever experienced was when my siblings had children. In some ways things got easier because many of the stresses of a blended family got quieter as we decided to let some of the old things go. It wasn’t easier for me. I was still ignored and left out but when I showed up, I loved my nephews and nieces. I loved to play with them, listen to them and talk to them. They enjoyed me too. I let the other stuff go because it was easy to ignore everything else and just fall in love with these amazing people that just loved me.

But then in 2014 I got really sick and ended up in the hospital. It changed me. It broke something in me that kept me strong enough to be the good girl and take whatever they expected me to take. I needed to be myself and I didn’t know who I was. I didn’t want any of the disadvantages of transactional relationships anymore. I married Karen G Clemenson and she was seeing what I had been talking about and couldn’t understand why these people were so dismissive and blatantly abusive towards me. They would call and terrorize me over the phone and after visits I would be in bed for days and she would beg me to eat and take my meds. My therapists had told me I needed to separate them from my life. These people were hurting me.

Finally I made the choice to take a break. I know it is close to the anniversary of this first choice because I have been having lots of nightmares lately. I had never intended it to become permanent but it has become obvious to me that it must be. When you don’t believe there is anything wrong with your behavior, you aren’t going to change, even if you think you love someone. My extended family doesn’t believe there is anything wrong with their behavior. So I am taking my father’s advice. If I am the problem then I must go away. I have asked him to let me go and I mean it. I don’t want anything from him. My mother says she doesn’t understand why I don’t want her in my life but I have told her if she will go to therapy I will consider a relationship with her, she is just in denial.

I didn’t remove them from my life to hurt them. I removed them from my life to protect myself.

What I want more than anything is for them to see what it would take for us to grow. Years ago I realized that I was abusing a dear friend because we were both abused as children. My friend needed to be abused and I needed to abuse someone. As much as I loved them, I would hear myself say terrible things to them when I was visiting them. By the time I would be driving home, I would hate myself. We were both in therapy and I realized that we were fulfilling a role that was unhealthy and we separated for a few years while we dealt with ourselves and now we have an honest and loving relationship. We give freely to each other out of love and not because we need to fill some gross need that was taught to us by someone that was wrong.

And the reason this has all come up? The last few weeks I have started a new Facebook account. It doesn’t have all the blocked pages that make me feel safe and Facebook knows who I should be connected to. I didn’t mind Facebook suggesting my youngest sibling to me. Or my oldest. The profile picture of my father’s wife’s Facebook account bothers me because that is what they looked like when things were the worst but I let it go…it was the profile of my first niece. She is gorgeous. I had to look at her pictures. She is engaged to be married. I am so happy for her. My heart bursts with joy for her and I wish I could hug her and tell her this in person but she is collateral damage. These beautiful children are not children anymore and I hoped that when they were adults they could make their own choices and reach out to me but they have been told, what they have been told. I know not to interfere.

So the only transaction I will make regarding this beautiful woman and her cousins is with Jesus in my prayers.

But in my current relationships, I don’t hold on like I used to. I love in the moment, expecting nothing in return. It works better for me. I was raised, keeping a ledger and that has only made me tired. I was taught that I had to talk to everyone about Jesus, but I have watched people become afraid at the sight of a cross on my neck so I stopped wearing them. When people ask me about the beads on my wrists, I tell them that God is in His creation and then I tell them what my intentions are for these beads. Its a good conversation starter. I don’t believe that the beads themselves do anything, but God, in HIs wisdom, does what He plans…and I think the beads are pretty. I have learned to listen for when people aren’t interested or when Jesus wants me to say less or something else. This seems to work better for me. Sometimes I am really surprised at what comes out of my mouth.

One of the points that Bob made in the bible study I was reading was that Jesus gave freely. He didn’t feed people and then ask them to pray with Him. Jesus didn’t heal people and then ask them to do anything in return. Jesus just loved because that is His nature. That is the way I want to live. I want to love because I have the energy and desire to love and when I am tired or I don’t have resources, I want to go home and reload. When Jesus got tired, He spent time with God in prayer. That is what we are supposed to do. That is how you give freely. You give what you have. It doesn’t have to be transactional if you give from your abundance and then go home.

Giving what you have to give works for all kinds of relationships because many of us have scars and hurts that are in their own timing of healing. I have a friend that wants to call me friend but they don’t return my messages. They want me to come to their shows. Even though I have explained that my wife works 3 jobs and I don’t want to go out alone and I would prefer to do other things, they need the validation other ways. They have been hurt really bad by personal relationships and like the shining lights and protection of the stage. I understand this but I can’t give it to them. So I give them what I can. Maybe one day they will be ready for more personal time or I will be ready for the bright lights and large groups but for now, I pray for them. The love is still there. It is still very real. It is what I have. It doesn’t deny them their needs and freedom, but I am not feeling some of the feelings I might have felt that they couldn’t give me what I needed, because I have learned to get what I need from Jesus.

Another relationship I had to let go because they were abusive to me. We would come together and at some point they would dump me. Because I loved them, I would forgive them and re-engage. It was a similar pattern I had learned from my extended family. But at some point I came to a realization that I didn’t want to be abused anymore. Even though I loved them, and sometimes they acted like they loved me, I realized that more than not, our relationship was always on their terms. I decided that I wanted more than that and when I talked to them about that, I also realized that they were always comparing me to them, even about things I could do nothing about. I gave them a wide berth because they were dealing with their mental illness and I was proud of them but I was aware that I needed to take care of myself too. In our last communication they told me they didn’t want to know me. So I listened to their words and let them go. I still pray for them when I think about them. I want them to have happiness, health and goodness in their life, but when they send me messages, I don’t reply because I have made the decision to not be abused anymore. I have learned to place people that I can’t have in my life in the hands of Jesus.

In my last conversations with my siblings I told them I had nothing for them. I was done. I still love them but I have given all I have for them. When I think of them I hope they have what they want in life, hope, love and joy. I am sometimes sad because I wish I had loving relationships with them and I mourn the few times that were joyful but the trust is gone and relationship has been comatose for many years. I am sure they have their own pain. We were all raised the same way. So many transactions. All I can do is place them in Jesus’ arms.

Jesus is not transactional. He loves everyone. He doesn’t get tired. He doesn’t run out of resources. He knows what to do always. I am supposed to give freely, not out of my lack. I don’t stop loving, I have stopped giving when I have nothing more to give. I have learned when to let people stay in the rear view mirror so I can move forward to new opportunities that were created by Jesus for each new day. This is how to live without transactions but to live freely. When we let people abuse us, it is too easy to allow our relationships to become transactional. I want my life to be less transactional. I want my life to be free.

You don’t get what you want by waiting for it to come to you most of the time. Most of life is about making choices. This has been a hard and very important lesson.

When Christ’s Name Is On Something It Should Mean Something

by Summer D Clemenson | Mar 6, 2024 | Opinions, Prayers

A couple of weeks ago I was inspired to write my editorial article: I Do Not Believe The United States Should Label Itself a Christian Nation. After sharing it with my wife, who has similar, but different beliefs than I do, I realized that maybe I should go deeper to explain why I feel this way, so strongly. It is not just a feeling for me, but a core belief, fueled by my regard for Christ. I believe that Christ’s name should be revered much more than it usually is. I believe the word Christian should be revered much more than it usually is. When Christ’s name is on something, it should mean something. If you are not a Christian or if you have been hurt by people who have been misled or are using that name of Jesus in the wrong way, this title can do more harm than good.

Wikipedia says that Christianity is an Abrahamic monotheistic religion based on the life and teachings of Jesus. It is the world’s largest and most widespread religion, with roughly 2.4 billion followers, comprising around 31.2% of the world population. Of course there is a ton if variation beyond this statement because cultures and denominations create differences of beliefs and traditions. The Greek word Christianos, meaning, “follower of Christ” comes from Christos, meaning “anointed one,” with an adjective ending borrowed from Latin to mean belonging to. So a Christian is a a follower of Christ or someone that belongs to Christ.

But being a Christian means something different to so many people. In fact some people have such a skewed view of what being a Christian is that I don’t think they are actually Christians and those people make many of us look bad. I don’t want to gossip or backbite here because that makes God sad and it makes me feel uncomfortable. I often feel uncomfortable because I hear those things happen so much. In fact that is what I hated the most about the churches I have spent the most time in. We should be sharing information to pray for and edify each other but often, that is not what we are doing when we are talking to each other at church and it makes me sad and angry.

I could say that the politics around religion has gotten bad all of the sudden but I read through the gospel of John this last week and I realized that Jesus’ crucifixion was completely a political thing, so politics in church is not a new thing, I just didn’t realize it has always been there until now. Of course Christ’s death was also part of His divine plan to save believers and Jesus blatantly gave His life in every way He could. Time and time again, every chance He had to save Himself, He gave Himself to us and for that I am thankful. But just because we aren’t good at separating church and state, doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try harder in order to recognize the foundation of our country’s origin: religious freedom. I believe that religious freedom means that we are all free to practice our choice of religion without persecution, which means that I need to give you room to disagree with me and have your own religion and not force my beliefs on you. Hopefully we can talk freely about our beliefs because that is how we might get to know each other without the stress of trying to “save” each other, but with the goal of understanding each other.

I spent a lot of time alone when I was growing up and even now. When I was 5 years old, I was in my backyard, under the apple trees and Jesus came to me and introduced Himself to me. From that moment on, I was never alone. Even when I didn’t know I was not alone, He was with me. Even when I forgot about Him, the Holy Spirit was with me. I have always enjoyed reading my bible and learning from people more wise than myself. There have always been times that I couldn’t hear certain messages and now I know that was God, hedging me in, so that I wouldn’t get confused by bad messages. God chose me and He has taught me many things. I have learned to hear His voice and to obey. When I was 25 years old, something in me thought I wasn’t as mature as I should be. I told God I was a 20 year old Christian but I felt like a toddler. So I challenged Him. My car had broke down and I had no way to get to church. No one missed me until it was my turn to dress the communion table. So I told God to prove His promises. I stayed away from church and waited for Him to teach me. He proved His promises and I grew faster than ever. It was so much easier to hear Him without the distractions of other people.

It has been 23 years and I haven’t been a able to find a church that I fit in. The humanity is too much for me. The showcasing or dogma or need for attention or the Pharisees stop me from wanting to return.

What I expect from churches is growth. I expect the people in the church to be better but when I visit them they are the same. I don’t need to be fed. I only need fellowship and worship. God will lead me to tithe if this is my home. He will lead me to serve when He has created the opportunity. I don’t need to be asked by church leaders. When I come to church I expect to see homeless in the congregation and people being ministered to randomly and the body moving but instead I find the same white, cookie cutter services with people that mean well but are held down by dogma or the need to perform for their ego’s sake and it makes me want to stay home and study by myself and pray by myself and give and act on the moments that God creates for me. It doesn’t make church valuable to me because no one has ever followed me home or even called until I missed my turn to serve them. This is why so many people are turned off by church; the lack of authenticity.

I saw an article the other day that explained some of the beliefs of Christian nationalists and it made me so sad that a group of people that supposedly believe in Jesus, think they should be treated special because of their beliefs; that they should have say in our government, economics, culture, education, media, arts and entertainment with the goal of power and conquest. These same people will vote in a person like Donald Trump, who does not embody any of the characteristics the bible tells us to look for in leadership but they want him because he will punish the people that are bad, he supports conspiracy theories and ideas that distract United States citizens from what is really important. They aren’t looking for a leader, they are looking for a bully that will break the United States so they can rebuild it the way they want it.

I know I am just one person. I am a woman that loves Jesus. Jesus did not like politicians when He was with us. He did not like the Pharisees. He loved them but He did not speak to them in words they could understand. He was not here for them. The rules and regulations had become of more importance to the Pharisees than the people, and that was why Jesus was here. He was here to tell the people about the love of God. He was here to show us mercy and forgiveness and healing. He was here to leave the Holy Spirit here for us to teach us God’s truth that our humanity, that seeks after lust, pride and greed was going to lead us nowhere but His love, mercy and truth would lead us to life.

Jesus was humble and He told us to serve others. He said specifically that those who wanted to be first, would be last. So I know that the beliefs of the Christian nationalists are based on confusion. The bible says that where there is confusion, that is not where God is and we must pray for these people. As true believers we can not place ourselves above anyone else. We are here to serve freely, not until we are angry and tired, but with the abundance that God gives us, so if it is too much for you, it is not your time, you need to rest. But if you have energy for this, please join me in praying for clarity in the hearts of the chosen and peace and joy to abound through Jesus Christ in His believers so that we can share it with everyone.

As believers Jesus’ name is written on us. We are important to Him. Each one of us is His church. We mean something. We don’t need a building or a body of believers to edify us. We need a relationship with Jesus. We need time in the word to learn His ways and how to hear the Holy Spirit guiding us toward truth and life. If we are able to find that in a group of believers that meets in a building, we are truly blessed, but you are also able to do this alone, or with a friend over coffee, or with a stranger on the street, or the librarian as you check out a book or with anyone that God puts in your path. You mean something. You make a difference. Be the church wherever you are. Don’t let the rules get in the way. Let God speak to you and through you. Learn His voice and obey. You can inspire the world.

Jesus changed the world and He said we would do greater than He. Let Him shine through you.

Be blessed!

I Feel So Blessed

by Summer D Clemenson | Mar 4, 2024 | Cancer, Opinions, Prayers

February was a hard month but it wasn’t without blessings and I feel so blessed!

As many of you know since October 2021 I have been dealing with the fact that I Have Cancer. It has been a long road with much self-searching, changes in diet and lifestyle and even in who I allow into my life. The cancer I have is endometrial cancer and it is slow growing. It is level one and hasn’t grown. I am thankful for this. The treatments have not killed the cancer but the cancer has not metastasized or gotten worse in any way. During this 2 1/2 year period, I am not sure how many D&Cs I have had to gather biopsies to check how we are doing. I need a hysterectomy but my weight is an issue. It has taken a while to figure out how to help my body lose weight. With all the other medications I take, including the treatment for the cancer I have, that causes weight gain, this has been hard, but we are finally having success.

I had my latest D&C early in February and my post-op meeting with my oncologist last week. She was so happy to tell me that my cancer has shrunk. I have been thinking about this and letting it sink in. I have been resigned to the idea that most of my illnesses are chronic and won’t go away and it is odd to me that there is a reality that one of my diagnosis’s will go away. That there will be medications that I won’t take forever. That we are getting closer to the finish line for cancer. That I can begin planning for other things to come in my wellness plan. I am so thankful!

Also I wrote that I Was Locked Out of My Facebook Account. This was very hard for me emotionally. But also financially. I have worked very hard to rebuild my family’s credit history and scores. We have come so far and I was so frustrated. But through diligence, I got the police report filed online and it was accepted, my bank disputed the charges and reversed them so I don’t have to pay for the charges and I feel so relieved. I was so worried about how to pay that bill. We never charge more than we can afford to pay off each month. We have never paid interest on that card and I didn’t want to start now. I can’t tell you how much weight this took off my shoulders.

I know that I shouldn’t have let this bother me. I was under medications I don’t usually take. People make mistakes. God is always taking care of me. But I felt shame. I felt guilt. Under normal circumstances I would have never engaged with these thieves but in reality I had been for some time. I trusted too easily and I now I know more. So there are many blessings to be celebrated here.

God took good care of me and guided me to His blessings. I am so grateful!

~

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Christian, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Christian…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

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The disadvantages of transactional relationships are:

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