When I was little we always had an artificial tree. I am sure part of the reason was because I was a very easily sick child. We started with a very small tree, maybe because my parents were afraid I would pull it over onto myself and then for a short while we lived in an apartment before we found our house on Oak Street when we moved to Longview. Then we got the big artificial tree. I don’t think my parents knew I am allergic to live Christmas trees; it was probably more of an economic choice on my father’s behalf.
The year after their divorce, my mother wanted to try things differently so she got a live tree and new ornaments. I struggled to get the tree into the stand and the lights just so. This job had always been Dad’s job and now it was mine. Yeah! (Not really) Somehow we lived through getting the tree up. I didn’t like the smell and the vacuuming was never ending. And the congestion and coughing was getting worse and worse every minute.
For the entire Christmas season I had to listen to my mother blame my unexpected sickness on a sudden allergy to my cat…Maxine had slept with me every night since she’d moved in and I never had a problem, but suddenly I was allergic to her. I didn’t see the logic in my 10-year-old mind.
Another difference was that we suddenly had to be afraid of the lights. On the artificial tree we could leave the lights plugged in and we never had to water it and the shedding was minimal. My vacuuming time had increased substantially…
Minutes after the tree had been thrown out the back door and the last needle vacuumed up, my congestion had almost completely cleared up…and by the next Christmas a new artificial tree had been purchased.
I have had employees that put up live trees that noticed that I was fine at the top of my shift and my eyes are red and swollen and I was coughing and sneezing by the end of my shift; not optimal when you work at an answering service…We learned to keep some of the doors shut for my benefit and I always keep cough drops on hand. Man was I happy when I saw new employers drag out artificial trees!
So many times people seem so sad for me when I tell them this little truth of mine, but I am not. Since I am allergic to them, the smell does not bring happy memories to me. If you take care of your artificial tree, you can use it indefinitely. I have used the same 6 ft tree, bought at Walmart, for over 25+ years at my home and at many other homes. If you are good at decorating, you can’t tell it is not real and although my tree has never been able to take Xavier’s weight, my mother’s 8 foot tree was able to hold him for a nap or two before he decided that he preferred the lit up sparkly fabric I used to put around the foot of her tree. If she had not run the stand over with her truck, while it was in the garage, it would still be standing. Heck with the help with some fishing line I got it to stand for one more Christmas anyway…
What I miss about Christmas is security and traditions. It seems like Karen and I haven’t been able to have those at the same time for a long time. I wouldn’t trade these years where we have grown and learned so much for anything, while we fixed our credit and Karen has had to make hard choices about her dream business or working and both. Where I have had to be honest with myself about my mental illness and chronic illness and learn to take care of myself and make hard choices about what I need and what I don’t need. We have some security but we still don’t have a lease so it isn’t solid and we don’t have many comforts that so many take for granted and some of the people we know don’t even have what we have and this breaks my heart. I haven’t figured out how to have Christmas traditions where we live, other than music and a few movies.
We are very blessed and I know this. I thank God for this always. This is my biggest prayer all the time! And I know we are very close to some of those things like a kitchen and laundry room that I always took for granted before, but never will again. When this happens, I imagine we will often have someone sleeping on our couch for a few days, or if we have a guest room, in the guest room. It is a good thing I can’t just make 1 quart of soup but always make 6 quarts of stew because I am sure we will have people over and I look forward to board games and maybe getting a dog. I don’t think Xavier will like that idea, but he has surprised me a lot this last year…so maybe that wont be as bad as I think. I look forward to foster kids or just kids…they will find us because we have a lot of love to share.
Cookies and lights can be part of every day. Movies and music can be enjoyed every day and good books and stories are important always. Karen always says we celebrate every day. We say, “I love you,” constantly. We think about each other and try to make each others burdens lighter, however we can. I guess that is Christmas all year. Although I miss having room for a Christmas tree, we have found ways to keep Christmas and maybe next year will be the best year yet! It’s OK if I am allergic to live Christmas trees…at least I am not allergic to Christmas.
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Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.
For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Christian, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information.
If you are interested in becoming a Christian…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:
Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.
I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.
I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
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