by Summer D Clemenson | Sep 21, 2022 | About Summer, Life, Opinions, Prayers & Thanksgiving
There used to be a screaming in my head all the time. She was very angry all the time and very distracting. Through therapy and seeking medical treatment for migraines and mental illness and practicing my own solitude, I rarely hear the screaming and usually it is during high stress times and I can name my trigger and use my tools to make it stop. Learning to think is so important. Learning to be at peace with myself and make decisions has saved my life. Now I am looking for a part of myself in books. I know I am a whole person as I am, but I feel like there is something I am missing and I feel like I will find it in a book somewhere.
As I shared in my last post, A New Chapter, I have been reading a collection of essays by William Deresiewicz entitled The End of Solitude. In one of an articles called Birthrights he writes:
“Anti-semitism is foundational to Christianity and endemic to Western art and thought.”
In case you didn’t know (I didn’t) endemic means: regularly found among a particular people or in a certain area. This is a very strong statement.
Deresiewicz is Jewish by nationality, born and raised in New York, who in tenth grade of his yeshiva school, got his hands on a book by Sigmund Freud that changed his mind about there being a god at all. He has been at peace with being an atheist ever since. Let me reiterate that I am at peace with this statement too. I have no judgement here, although I am a Christian, I believe in freedom of choice and I applaud Deresiewicz’s bravery. For him, Judaism is not just a religion, it is his family history.
I was pondering these thoughts from last night, even today, as I began my bible study and then I read my first bible verse and I felt so overjoyed:
Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning.
James 1:17
I haven’t really been a regular church goer for about 20 years. I think it is because I can feel the same level of humanity that comes shooting at me from Deresiewicz’s statement above. I couldn’t grow anymore in my relationship with The Father, The Son and The Holy Spirit in a room of people that didn’t really want to grow and in an organization that wasn’t really designed for growth. This too is a harsh statement. I miss fellowship and sometimes I slip into a building and enjoy worship but I know I don’t fit there, so I don’t stay.
The last church I went to had a row of 4 computers right in front of the doors for my donating ease and they even passed the baskets after a reminder of how important it was to tithe. Recently, I even saw an invitation on Facebook to a church where they list one of the goals of this meeting was a particular amount of donations. Don’t get me wrong I give to people even if it isn’t in the form of a check to a church and God knows. Jesus never carried a money bag but He did feed people and He loved them.
Neither church addressed the needs of the people living on the streets, any needs at the shelters, needs for volunteer visitors at nursing homes or hospice, anyone to help seniors and widows keep up their yards or any other need in the community. No one talked about volunteers to help coach people who need help reading or practicing their English. There was no mention of people to help at the food banks or to collect school supplies for the students who need it.
In my opinion our churches are not doing their job. I don’t care how pretty their structures are. I do like good music but I don’t care how high tech their sound board is…
I think Deresiewicz’s statement is so true because like Marianne Williamson says in her book A Return to Love, “…to experience love in ourselves and others, is the meaning of life.” In order to do this we must let go of our fears and relearn love.
What is anti-semitism, judgement and hatred but offshoots of fear? If we recognize that we are afraid and we face it, learn what we are ignorant about, and make a new decision, a choice to love, than another man’s belief is not overwhelming, it is not scary, it is just his belief. Maybe we will talk about it or maybe we will talk about other things. Learning why we are afraid and making new choices gives us more options and I belief these too, are good and perfect gifts from above that come down from my Father of lights.
Commercialism is not a a Christian standard. It is right on the spectrum with coveting…and even though Jesus came to free us from the law, the 10 commandments are still worthy of glancing at.
“Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the law?” Jesus said to him, “’You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind,’ This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like it: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ On these two commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets.”
Matthew 22:36-40
Jesus came to fulfill all the prophecies and free us from the law. This may be one of many reasons why it is so hard to be an Orthodox Jew. There are 613 laws in the Bible and thousands more elaborated by rabbis. (Chapter 38 — Birthrights — The End of Solitude by William Deresiewicz)
It isn’t nearly as hard to be a devout Christian as we think it is. You love God with all your heart and your neighbor as yourself. That is only hard if you are full of fear and hate…but if you spend more time with God, He will take care of that. I know my alone time with God has grown me up in ways I never imagined. There is no variation or shadow of turning in His love. For that I am thankful always!
Bless you!
~
Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.
For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Christian, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information.
If you are interested in becoming a Christian…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:
Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.
I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.
I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
by Summer D Clemenson | Jun 10, 2022 | Life
I recently finished the double book set of A Return to Love and The Gift of Change by Marianne Williamson and I have to say it was an inspiring and challenging undertaking. Although I thought I would like the double book idea, in the end, it felt tedious and I am not sure I will jump at the chance to purchase 2 books in one again. However, that does not take away from the life-changing experiences I had while reading the books and I really think that reading A Return to Love and then The Gift of Change is a wonderful way to reinforce the messages in the two books because the 2nd really reinforces the first. Being that love is the most important thing we need to be relearning and fear be the thing we need to unlearn and forgiveness is key to both.
God Never Loses Enthusiasm For Life!
“Every situation comes bearing a gift: a chance to become who we really want to be and to live the lives we really want to live…God never loses His enthusiasm for life, and neither should we.” Marianne Williamson, The Gift of Change
The joy of living comes when we stop seeing ourselves as other people see us, forgive ourselves and others and remember we were born with the purpose of being loved and to love.
The ego is an embodiment of our own self-hatred. It has the power of our minds turned against us while it sabotages our hopes and dreams. It keeps us separate from others. It keeps us afraid.
As we accept that we are children of God and practice loving ourselves and others, our ego gets smaller and less important. Remembering we are all connected through our Creator frees us from fear.
We Are All Connected Through Our Creator
We forget who we are because we forget we are connected through our Creator and Source and we can’t serve wealth and our egos and serve love at the same time. When we remember we are connected we know that by harming others, we harm ourselves so we would never do that. We find ourself saying old negative messages about ourself and we need to stop and reprogram ourself:
I am amazing because God only creates perfection. I recognize my immeasurable value, regardless of my mistakes, for which I ask forgiveness for. I am God’s creation and I ask the universe to reflect back to me the greatness of God that is within me.
~
“We are trained within this world, to see ourselves as the ego defines us…We are taught to identify with our guilt more than our innocence, and then we feel haunted by mistakes we feel will dominate the rest of our lives; we are taught to blame others more than to forgive them, and then we get stuck in feelings of victimization; we are taught that we are separate from others, and then we fall prey to grandiosity and insensitivity.” Marianne Williamson, The Gift of Change
Changing the World Starts With Changing Our Minds
The thoughts we think can bring us joy or fear depending on whether they are positive or negative. Choosing peace and forgiveness will bring our collective mind closer to peace and forgiveness. What we proclaim to be true will seem to be true. We must train our minds to proclaim gratitude and positive thoughts — there is always goodness. Even if you miss the warm sun and are sick of the rain, trees and vegetables needs lots of rain.
How we see ourself is how we see our life and we are responsible for how we experience our life.
“…life isn’t about not having problems, it’s about becoming someone who knows how to do well within problems in a positive way. It’s about taking full responsibility for however we might have contributed to a problem, forgiving ourselves and others, praying for all concerned, and developing faith that God’s miracle is always on the way.” Marianne Williamson, The Gift of Change
When we feel stuck it is because we are looking outside and not inside ourselves and holding onto old coping skills. We blame others when we should take responsibility for our lives. We judge others instead of bless them. We close ourselves off instead of being kind and open-minded. When we deal with our issues we are a blessing to those around us.
How can we bless people instead of judge them when they are hurting us, maybe repeatedly? Ask God to show us their perspective. This will help us have compassion. This might still mean we need to limit our time with this person but loving them instead of closing our hearts to them is a good place to start for reconciliation.
“We were born with a natural desire to extend ourselves in love, yet the thinking of the world then trains us to think unnaturally, spontaneous compassion occurs when situations happen so quickly that ego thoughts of fear and separation are bypassed. Ironically, dangerous situations often bring out the natural in people.” Marianne Williamson, The Gift of Change
If You Want Peace You Must Have Time with God
Meditation and spending time with God daily is imperative to peace. It increases our spiritual muscle and makes the challenges of life easier. It also strengthens our relationship and reliance on our Creator. 5 minutes at the beginning of the day is vital. The longer you can spend, the easier it will be to live in peace. These minutes can look like lots of things: giving Him your first thoughts before you get out of bed, bible study, meditation, worship with song and dance, random talks with Him, your last thoughts before you go to sleep. Any time you spend with your Higher Power is going to help you stay focused on your goal to forget fear and learn love.
“If you want a miracle in your life, simply pray for one. For as long as you are willing to change your mind, then God will change your life.” Marianne Williamson, The Gift of Change
Our ego is supported by our thoughts that have been trained to pull us away from love and abundance so we experience fear and lack. As we trust more and let fear dissolve, we will live the pure life we were made for. But we have to choose to trust our fears to our Maker. God honors our right to choose our fears. Our ego makes us feel strong when we are defensive but that is an illusion. When we are vulnerable before God, His love can flow through us with His spiritual strength. Childlike peace replaces childish projecting.
“To pray, ‘God please take this,’ is an act of empowerment, not weakness…When I remember that God’s power is unlimited, I stop stressing about how limited mine is.” Marianne Williamson, The Gift of Change
God Was With You Yesterday But He Is With You Now
God and miracles only happen now. The ego likes to keeps us in the past or future (otherwise known as anxiety) so we can’t enjoy our life now. Living in the past or future is painful because it leaves God out. The past is only connected to the future if we let it. When we let our thoughts and actions become based on yesterday’s circumstances we are giving up our right to change the circumstances. We are also leaving out what we have learned since then.
“Joy can be found only one place at one time: right here, right now. Regardless of where we’re going tomorrow, it’s important to bless where we are and enjoy the fruits of today.” Marianne Williamson, The Gift of Change
When we blame others the ego can remind us of our guilt too and keep our self-hatred growing. When we forgive others and ourself and accept our healing and innocence from the Holy Spirit we will find peace. Trusting the Holy Spirit to heal and care for you and others will free you to be full of joy and maybe the person that hurt you too. Maybe it will change the dynamic of your relationship in a good way or maybe it will show you how your path has moved away from this person but you are still able to love as you walk away. Either way you have peace.
“It doesn’t matter what someone said when you were a child; you know now that you’re smart and attractive. It doesn’t matter what happened before; you can rise up now and start over. It doesn’t matter what they did to you; forgiveness has washed you clean.” Marianne Williamson, The Gift of Change
To be a miracle worker we must:
- see forgiveness as our function
- give up all our invented personal goals
- avoid self-initiated plans
- know if you are afraid, you are trusting in your strength and not God’s
“It’s time to see miracles in our own lives, to be resurrected from the littleness of our former selves. Through God, these things are impossible. These miracles are available, and they are necessary now.” Marianne Williamson, The Gift of Change
There was so much to absorb from reading The Gift of Change. Believe it or not, these are not all my notes. I learned so much from both A Return to Love and The Gift of Change and many were reminders of many other times I have gone through tremendous growth. These reminders were a gift and made it easy to embrace the messages. It made it easy for me to reaffirm that I want to unlearn my fears and relearn to love and be open to love and forgiveness even when it would be natural for me to close myself off because I feel hurt or scared. I imagine the process of change will require some practice but I am thankful that I am never alone on this path because my Creator is with me always.
Be blessed.
~
Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.
Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:
Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.
I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.
I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
by Summer D Clemenson | May 25, 2022 | Book & Product Reviews, Education, Opinions
I bought A Return to Love back when Marianne Williamson was running for president in 2020 but I didn’t get around to reading it until now. I actually think I wasn’t ready to read it until this time in my life and I am really glad I was able to absorb it in this time where I am better able, and trying to forgive more, putting effort into unlearning fear, and learning to love better. I really enjoyed this book and I highly recommend it to a mature reader and a mature Christian or person who is comfortable in their beliefs.
The book I have is actually two books in one: A Return to Love and The Gift of Change, both by Marianne Williamson. There was so much to absorb in A Return to Love that I chose to do two different book reviews. I haven’t read the second book yet but I will do a separate book review for The Gift of Change when I have completed reading that book.
Marianne begins A Return to Love by explaining that she was raised in a Jewish home and has studied many religions. She also set aside her beliefs for some time and now is a Christian. Although her writing leaves room for any higher power, she refers openly to God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit as her belief system and some people might be offended by this.
“The spiritual journey is the relinquishment — or unlearning of fear and the acceptance of love back into our hearts. Love is the essential existential fact. It is our ultimate reality and our purpose on earth. To be consciously aware of it, to experience love in ourselves and others, is the meaning of life.” Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love
Commonly throughout the book Marianne writes that people undervalue what we know to be true in our hearts and overvalue the things our physical senses can see. We do this because love is hard to see because love is an energy that is experienced through kindness, giving, mercy, compassion, peace, joy, acceptance, non-judgement, joining and intimacy. Fear is the opposite of love and gives a false testimony to the meaningless of love. Fear looks like anger, abuse, disease, pain, greed, addiction, selfishness, obsession, corruption, violence and war. Love is threatening to our ego because it is simple.
Concepts Discussed in this Book:
- Love is the only reality.
- Fear is the opposite of love.
- Fear is an alternative reality.…no wonder we all feel crazy…
- Forgiveness transforms fear to love.
- Ego wants to judge.
- Holy Spirit wants to accept people as they are and provides room for compassion.
“The places in our personality where we tend to deviate from love are not our faults, but our wounds.” Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love
“Forgiveness is the choice to see people as they are now. When we are angry at people, we are angry because of something they said or did before this moment. But what people said or did is not who they are. Relationships are reborn as we let go of the perceptions of our brother’s pasts. ‘By bringing the past into the present, we create a future just like the past.’ By letting the past go, we make room for miracles.” Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love
All negativity comes from fear. Anger, rudeness, manipulation, cruelty all comes from fear. Forgiveness transforms them all. Pain doesn’t come from the love we don’t give others but from the love we choose not to give. So the answer is to ask the Holy Spirit to change our perspective and help us forgive. When we close our heart in response to other people’s choices we hurt ourself but when we remain able to give love we see a miracle.
According to A Return to Love and my personal experience, the world has taught us to fear. This is unnatural to humans because we were created in God’s image and love is the only real emotion. This is what we have to return to — to live in love and let go of fear. When we are feeling angry or annoyed with people we can confess this to the Holy Spirit, who wants to help us, and we will see the help we need, whether it is more compassion or forgiveness, or whatever is needed in the moment.
Steps to Process Change:
- See my dysfunctional patterns
- Confess and ask God to take them
- Commit to change
“Personal growth can be painful because it can make us feel ashamed and humiliated to face our own darkness. But the goal of personal growth is the journey from dark emotional patterns that cause us pain to those that create peace.” Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love
When someone hurts use we can blow up at them or we can forgive them. Here is a helpful prayer to repeat until you are not longer angry:
“I forgive you _________________, and I release you to the Holy Spirit.”
This is a simple and very powerful prayer because it acknowledges that you know that God loves you and this person and wants the best for both of you. It also proclaims your trust in the Holy Spirit. I have tried this prayer out on many people and even with forgiving myself with some pretty powerful responses.
“…there is nothing we have been through or seen, or done, that cannot be used to make our lives more valuable now. We can grow from any experience, and we can transcend any experience. This kind of talk is blasphemy to the ego, which respects pain, glorifies pain, worships pain, and creates pain. Pain is its centerpiece. It sees forgiveness as its enemy.” Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love
Our only real pleasure will come when we do what God created us to do. We must ask Him to help us be an instrument of His peace and use the abilities He gave us to spread love.
“…as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we’re liberated from our fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love
Trusting God is like trusting gravity. 2 points to remember:
- God’s plan works
- Mine doesn’t
“It is our humility, our desire to be of service, that makes us stars. Not our arrogance.” Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love
We can only receive God’s plan. If we add anything to it we take away the little that was asked of us. We are only to align ourself with God’s plan. He will make it happen. This is a very anti-world mindset. But it can be done.
“Dear God, I surrender this situation to you. May it be used for your purposes. I ask only that my heart be open to give love and to receive love. May all the results unfold according to Your will. Amen.” Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love
Another important concept that is talked about in A Return to Love are that we are interrelated but we have forgotten that because our ego supports a mentality where instead of “we” we talk about “my career”, “my money” or “my life.” But we are not separate. This falsely created separateness leads us to mistake where we put our devotion — our stuff instead of our love, relationships and our higher power.
We hear people say to us to feel our feelings, which is important, but they are usually referring to fear, pain, shame, all the negative emotions, but we also need to feel all the positive ones too: love, satisfaction, joy… The ego does not like positive thoughts and works against them but our natural inheritance is to enjoy the good in our lives, especially if it is small. There is nothing wrong with being too happy.
Love is not just sentimental mush on a greeting card. It is a practiced discipline of defying our ego’s voice. It is relying on the Holy Spirit and focusing on the our capacity to love by training our minds to the habits of loving.
Today’s goal is peace. I should have that tattooed somewhere.
Buy your own copy of A Return to Love and The Gift of Change by Marianne Williamson on Amazon
Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.
Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:
Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.
I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.
I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
Please wait...
