Life Being Beautiful

I find it interesting that I can learn something from any situation if I look hard enough. There is always a message. For instance the last novel I read, The Lost Apothecary by Sarah Penner, got me to think about my bosom friend and how she has spoken life into me and helped me to not give up on what makes me really happy. The other night my wife and I went out to a public place for dinner for the first time since COVID-19 and it was so inspiring. I saw many lovely people and saw life being beautiful there too. The picture above is from last night. We were glad to hear our friend Jeff Hamilton play his great music and get a picture with him afterwards.

Life is not without struggle. It is meant to be that way. That is how we learn and grow. But there is also moments of joy and peace and we must enjoy those times too. When I got sick in 2014, I never thought it would take this long to get to where I am now, I never thought I would only be this far on my wellness journey, I didn’t even really know what a wellness journey was. There are parts of me I lost back then that are not going to come back and I am glad. They were not the best parts of me. They didn’t serve me or anyone else to their growth. But there were parts of me that I needed and I have missed them and I thought I would never have them back.

I can’t tell you how happy I am to have my migraines more under control than ever. Even knowing that I have always had them is helpful. To not know you are in pain is a different kind of struggle. But to learn how to live without that constant pull and strain in your body is a special kind of peace. The ability to pay attention and focus again has given me the ability to feed my brain positive things when I desperately need it. I had been able to handle my small bible studies but now I can go longer and I can read books that inspire me and lift me up when Veda is here or I am bored. When I was a child, I always had a book on me. So reading is something I have always enjoyed and something I really missed. I come from people who read. This was normal to me; not what I had become. Not being able to read probably fed Veda’s visits more and made me more unhappy with my possible future but now I can go on adventures my body could never go on and my brain can be fed and I am happy.

Part of the journey that the character, Caroline, was on in The Lost Apothecary, that her friend helped her see was that she had buried away what she really wanted to do. My own best bosom friend and sister, Jamie Holloway has done for me what I have done for her this same way. Years ago I built JamieChasesButterflies.com for her to write whatever she wanted to write. I knew she needed to communicate and I knew how to build websites. Through the years she has flourished and her writing has improved, while her communication has soared. She too encouraged me to build a blog for myself. It didn’t make sense for me at the time. I couldn’t read and I was anxious after being online too long so it took a long time for me to listen to her but eventually it helped me to have a place where I could collect a lot of my writings from many online platforms. As I have been able to focus, my blog is something I write in several times a week. It is something I need to do. Writing is something I need to do.

I was talking to my wife, Karen G Clemenson, about that yesterday and she agreed that out of all my hobbies, writing was something she could see that I need to do. It brings me more joy and peace. I still enjoy cooking and it is a practical thing to do to feed my family. I still enjoy crocheting and I will still work on projects as long as my hands hold out. I love to sing but my voice is big I tend to keep it to myself while we live in multi-family dwellings so I don’t bother people…but writing is something I can do and love to do and have always loved to do and reading, well it just seems to make it easier to get words out when I have fed so many words into my brain.

The other night Karen and I went to the Broadway Barrel Room on 14th Ave and Commerce in Longview, Washington. It was previously known to local Longviewites as Cassava. The service was absolutely amazing! They didn’t really change the decor much from the previous owners except for the bar, but it is still gorgeous in there. Great for live music! It was great to see the live musicians. It had been so long since we had been able to enjoy this!

Live music was performed by Matt Smith, Judah Young, Erik Nordin, Jeff Hamilton and the Broadway Boyz.

I have been friends with Jeff Hamilton for years and I remember when I first saw him perform at an open mic at Evangel Christian Fellowship, over 20 years ago. He was this gangly kid but when he sang he came to life. I had never seen anyone play the guitar the way does up to that point. I had never seen anyone show his heart the way he does when he performs and he has only gotten better. The real joy of this show is that his real heart, is not to be a big fancy famous star but a teacher. I watched him giving inspiration to the young musicians, showing them his way of being comfortable sharing between songs, touching the crowd, giving himself to the music and the onlookers, making jokes, talking about the songs he had written for his children, enjoying the children in the room and encouraging them to join him in songs they knew. I would say that people are Jeff’s inspiration but music is his tool.

The cool thing about going out in public is that you get opportunities to react to people and interact with them. I loved the way a lady in the restroom needed to share with me how touched she was by the children singing with Jeff. I also found people to pray for. I didn’t ask them. They didn’t ask me but I could see they could use it so I silently interceded for them. I guess that is what I do too. I pray for people.

Jeff mentioned that I do a lot and I used to do a lot. Now I go a lot slower than I did before I got sick. I didn’t plan on living to be old. I didn’t want to. I figured I wasn’t going to marry or have children so I needed to leave a legacy another way. I worked hard until I got too sick. Somewhere in all that being sick God changed my mind. Now I want to be 80 years old some day and I am still thinking positive about being a mother and grandmother. I have been a wife for over 8 years now and I enjoy it. I have learned to choose peace and joy more than ever and my life is better all the time because God has helped me see the good and focus on that.

Jeff was correct though. Prayer is important. I do it every day and I do it whenever I feel it needs to be done. He too has helped me find a quiet in myself that wasn’t there before. Some of us have to work hard to find peace and joy and he and I have that in common. There are many gifts in life, mostly people that help make life being beautiful.

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Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Book Review: The Watchmakers by Harry Lenga and Scott Lenga

I loved the book, The Watchmakers by Harry Lenga and Scott Lenga, and devoured all 262 pages in one afternoon. I simply could not put it down. There was also a glossary, sources and endnotes that I used and or skimmed as needed. I have to admit this book sat for 3 days because I was afraid to pick it up. I had spent my entire high school years researching the Holocaust and I know the depth of evil that can be in humanity. Learning about the Holocaust and the level of depravity at literally every level: mental, emotional, physical that the Nazi regime used to control a nation and erase over 6 million people makes it easy to imagine any evil on the earth. I don’t say that to take away from any other people group. It is just a fact. Nothing that has happened to any other people group didn’t happen to the Jews during the Holocaust in calculated fashion, yet amongst the hate, filth and depravity there is the beautiful part of humanity: in the midst of the worst some of us are able to come together in love and hold each other up.

This book is written by Scott Lenga, yet he lovingly used interviews and memories of his father, Harry Lenga’s stories and tried to keep the story in his father’s voice. Three brothers: Maileckh, Moishe and Khil had humble beginnings as poor Jewish sons of a watchmaker that honored the religious traditions of his faith.

“For the rest of my life, I resented my father’s readiness to give charity to other people despite the immediate and cruel expense to our family. But it was the religious discipline and poverty that would later translate into valuable survival skills when I needed them during the war. My father’s true reward for his suffering and his commitment to charity was not the two zlotys (Polish currency worth .01) from a strange customer but rather that his four sons would survive the Shoah (Holocaust).” Harry Lenga, Chapter 2

Khil was outgoing and able to speak to many people. He enjoyed his studies and also enjoyed learning to repair watches with his father. There were other opportunities for Khil to learn other trades but he felt his father was an excellent and patient teacher. These things he learned from his father’s workbench would later save his life and the lives of his brothers in the darkest days.

As the Germans were taking over different parts of Poland the brothers traveled from their home in Koshnitz to Warsaw, Poland looking for work. The older brothers were learning to cut leather for shoes, while Khil continued to practice his trade and become better at it under the help of other watchmakers. Soon the Germans were in Warsaw and Khil was summoned to the Parliament building.

“Looking back on it now, It’s unbelievable what happened in that room in the Parliament building. If a Polish guy wanted to beat up a Jew, he would yell at you first. He would call you “dirty Jew” or “Christ killer” or something like that. He would beat you only after he made himself angry. But those German guys were not even angry. They didn’t call me dirty Jew or any other name. They were completely  without emotion, without rakhmunes (compassion), without anything. Even when they saw the blood on me, it didn’t affect them. It was just their job, and they are enjoying it. The guy at the typewriter had been laughing. For him, it was entertainment, a comedy. They were doing those beating the whole day, one after another.” Harry Lenga, Chapter 4

Because the address on his identification card had been bombed he was safe for some time before he was found so he didn’t have to leave immediately. He was able to work a bit longer before going home. With the help of a friend he was able to sneak out of the Warsaw Ghetto and get home to his family without being killed.

He was happy to see his family although it wasn’t long before one of his father’s trusted friends let him know that he needed to send his sons away if he wanted them to live. Mikhoel Lenga sent his 3 sons away with as many watchmaking tools and parts as they could carry, which served them well. By morning the boys’ father was picked up and taken to Treblinka.

Treblinka was an extermination camp. More Jews were killed at Treblinka than any other extermination camp except Auschwitz. The Germans only set up extermination camps in Poland. In Poland 2.7 million people were murdered by asphyxiation with poisonous bass or by shooting. – Chapter 6

“We three brothers made a pact between us that whatever happened to one would happen to all of us. If one got taken to be killed, we all wanted to be killed. If we saw a chance to save each other, we had to try…and we did.” Harry Lenga, Chapter 7

There was a theme where the brothers, especially Khil, had to be brave enough to ask for help. Always willing to give what they had for their brother, but always willing to ask for what they needed.

“We worked hard to keep hope in our minds and not to become meshuga (crazy). And the more you talked yourself into it the more you believed in that hope. If a hungry person believes that he’ll find something to eat later, he can last longer. If he thinks, It’s pointless  and I won’t survive, he dies faster. I saw it happen many times. Pessimism is a terrible sickness. You destroy yourself. You have to have optimism all the time.” Harry Lenga, Chapter 9

The three brothers: Maileckh, Moishe and Khil were together through 2 ghettos and several concentrations camps:

  • Warsaw Ghetto – Poland
  • Koshnitz Ghetto – Poland
  • Gorczycki Camp – Poland
  • Wolanow Slave Labor Camp – Poland
  • Starachowice Slave Labor Camp – Poland
  • Auschwitz-Birkenau Extermination Camp – Poland
  • Mauthausen Concentration Camp – Austria
  • Melk Concentration Camp – Austria
  • Ebensee Concentration Camp – Austria

Once they were freed the three brothers were reunited with their oldest brother. They are able to change their names and establish their own lives. Mailech changed his named to Marcel and moved to Paris. Moishe changed his name to Morris and moved to The United States. Khil changed his name to Harry, after Harry Truman and he also moved to The U.S.

All the brothers eventually married and had families and were able to be together for the wedding of one of their children before one brother died. Each one was a successful business owner. Scott wrote that he knew not to complain to his father about any thing. Most things Scott might find unpleasant were nothing compared to what his father had endured and could endure. He said that the blue tattoo on his arm was something he ever got used to seeing like a mole or a scar. Scott had great empathy for his father, living in an adopted culture that could not possibly understand him.

The atrocities that occurred during the Holocaust still happen today. Now we call it slavery, sex trafficking, child abuse, domestic violence, religious purification and many other names. Hate comes in many names. What can we do? Hold onto hope and share it loudly. When you see abuse, help where you can. Love fiercely. Persecution will always be there, choose peace and optimism knowing that if you get through this you can live another day to do better.

There were times that Harry had the ability to get revenge. He chose to let revenge be for someone else for his own peace. He understood that his revenge might be justified but by joining in the hate he would tear himself apart. When you join in the hate that is what you do.

I want to thank my sister, Jamie Holloway, for sharing this book with me. If you would like to read her book review you can find it at JamieChasesButterflies.com.

Buy your own copy of The Watchmakers: A Story of Brotherhood, Survival, and Hope Amid the Holocaust by Harry Lenga and Scott Lenga on Amazon.

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Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

What Have We Done?

Yesterday was a big day for emotions. Many people happy and many people afraid or angry about the Supreme Court’s decision to revoke Roe v Wade. I consider myself a concerned citizen for people who live in states that do not leave room for humanity in a legal aspect but what got me thinking was a poll someone put up in a group I didn’t add myself to. I don’t even remember the question because it was so ignorant and one sided and I surely didn’t respond to it…but it did get me thinking. This is not a yes or no question. It is lots of aspects question, so many that one article wouldn’t be enough. But I am going to share a few questions I started thinking about because of that question, that I can’t remember besides What Have We Done?

When people don’t have the right to make the medical decisions that they feel they need to make, for their personal reasons and a child is born that they don’t want what happens? They are stuck with a child they don’t want. Now the beautiful thing about God is that most of the time the hormones He created to be running through a mother’s veins during the birthing process cause them to fall in love with their baby and the rest is a story of hard word and love but sometimes it isn’t.

How many children are in Foster Care in the United States?

According to the Children’s Bureau at the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services’ Administration for Children and Families (ACF) there were 407,000 children in foster care in The United State of America at the end of 2020. 117,000 of those children were waiting to be adopted as their parents had lost all legal rights to their children. These numbers were down from the previous year, with no clear reason, but still large.

In more recent numbers, according to iFoster, a nonprofit that helps assist in making sure that foster children have what they need to thrive while growing up in foster care, there are approximately 424,00 children in foster care nationwide. The number of children in foster care changes constantly and there are no two months or years that are the same.

The median age of children in foster care is 6 1/2 years old which has a huge impact on their cognitive and emotional development. Each year 20,000 young people age out of a system that is hugely underfunded. They often have not finished high school and have no chance at going to college. Within 4 years of aging out of the system, and no support system these young people often end up on government assistance or homeless.

How many children are being abused in the United States?

Before we can answer this questions we have to address what abuse is. There are 4 main types of abuse and neglect:

  • Physical Abuse: intentional physical force that results in an injury like hitting, kicking, shaking or burning.
  • Sexual Abuse: Pressuring or forcing a child to engage in sexual acts like fondling, penetration and exposing a child to other sexual activities.
  • Emotional Abuse: Behaviors that harm a child’s self-worth or emotional wellness like name-calling, shaming, rejecting, withholding love and threatening.
  • Neglect: Failure to meet a child’s basic physical and emotional needs like housing, food, clothes, education, access to medical care, validation of feelings and being appropriately responded to.

At least 1 in 7 children have experienced abuse or neglect in the last year in the United States. Since most cases are not reported, this number is probably larger.

In 2020 there were 618,399 reported cases of child abuse and neglect in the US.

In 2019 there were 4.4 million referrals involving alleged maltreatment of children to CPS agencies.

2/3 of all reports of alleged child abuse cases are by educational personnel, law enforcement and legal personnel, medical staff, social services, foster parents and daycare providers. Most other reports of child abuse come from friends, neighbors, relatives and anonymous reporters.

Children that have experienced abuse may have the immediate cuts, bruises and broken bones but they may also have emotional, psychological and cognitive difficulties throughout their life as well. As adults they may experience being a victim or perpetrator, substance abuse, STIs and difficulties finding employment.

In 2019, 29 states reported 877 unique cases of sex trafficking. Of these children, 88.5% were girls and 76.2% of all children were aged 14-17, some of these children were infants.

The top ten states for human trafficking are:

  1. Nevada
  2. Mississippi
  3. Florida
  4. Ohio
  5. Georgia
  6. Delaware
  7. California
  8. Missouri
  9. Michigan
  10. Texas

In 2019 38,625 infants in 47 states were referred to CPS as infants with prenatal substance exposure.

How many children are murdered each year in the United States?

In 2020, 1,750 children died of abuse and neglect in the United States of America.

In 2019, 1,840 children died due to abuse and neglect.

We Must Do Better

So unwanted children have it pretty hard. I have heard the same people who say abortion is evil complain about people on government assistance when the two are partners for a reason. Unwanted children grow up and tend to be adults that are unable to support themselves and have chronic conditions we as a society must continue to support, and the cycle continues.

The next thing I was concerned about is that clinics that offer abortions probably offer other services that are very important. in more rural areas, I am sure that these clinics are a God-send. But as funding is cut off to many clinics they will be closed down, making it harder for people to get the medical help they need.

What services are offered at abortion clinics?

Besides abortion services the following services may be offered at clinics:

  • Birth Control
  • General Health Care
    • Annual Exams (Pelvic and Breast)
    • Pap Smears
    • Screenings and Treatment for Polycystic Ovary Syndrome
    • Cancer Screenings: Breast, Cervical and Prostate
    • Screening & Referrals for Obesity, Diabetes and Dyslipidemia
    • Screening & Referrals for Mental Health Issues and Addictions
  • HIV services
  • Patient education
  • Pregnancy testing & services
  • STD testing, treatment & vaccines
  • Transgender Services
    • Hormone Therapy
    • Surgical Referrals for Gender Reassignment
    • Post-surgical Follow Up
    • Clerical Services

Where Do We Go From Here?

I know I could have gone deeper with my research. I know there is more information to know and to share. I just couldn’t keep going. These things make me sad and angry. I feel lucky that in Washington state we don’t have to worry about these things but I feel bad for people in states that aren’t honest about humanity. Texas is against abortion but they are the state with the highest rate of child abuse too. Over half of the states that are highest for sex trafficking also have laws against women’s rights to make medical decisions about their bodies.

In the end of all my reading I was most surprised by one thing…can you guess who the largest perpetrator of child abuse is? It is white mothers. The stats show that twice as many reported cases of child abuse are of white parents over black parents. Yet the media often portrays the bad guy with a black face. But that is a different blog…

I am going to keep praying. I hope you will too.

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Read More At:

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Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Book Review: Black Like My by John Howard Griffin

“I learned a strange thing — that in a jumble of unintelligible talk the word “nigger” leaps out with electric clarity. You always hear it and always it stings. And always it casts the person using it into a category of brute, ignorance.” John Howard Griffin, Black Like Me, November 8 excerpt

I recently re-read this powerful book entitled Black Like Me by John Howard Griffin. I remember reading it in high school, back in the early 90’s but really all I remembered was that he was a white man, a journalist, and he had chemically darkened his skin with the help of a dermatologist in order to experience the life of a black man. Every other detail was brand new to me and I have to say reading this book has shaken me to my very core as a white woman, as a United States citizen and as a spouse to a mulatto woman, born in 1965, in North Carolina.

“Walking along Dryades, through the ghetto, I realized that every informed man with whom I had spoken, in the intimate freedom of colored bond, had acknowledged a double problem for the Negro. First, the discrimination against him. Second, and almost more grievous, his discrimination against himself; his contempt for the blackness that he associates with his suffering; his willingness to sabotage his fellow Negroes because they are part of the blackness he has found so painful.” John Howard Griffin, Black Like Me, November 10-12 excerpt

Just as the SS encouraged other Jewish prisoners to abuse and take ownership over other Jewish prisoners during the Holocaust, some white people encouraged black people to abuse each other and most of the rest of the white people stood by and let it happen. I have often read about black culture, slave culture. I know it was common for slaves to abuse their children bitterly because they felt it was better that they beat their children then the master do it. In many families this is still in place, this post slavery trauma response that hasn’t been altered by time because of lots of reasons, all individual to each family. And not just because of lack of education or change in some black families but the lack of education and change in some white families; the existence of white supremacy that is so accepted that we don’t realize it is there.

In his November 14 excerpt, Griffin travels to Mississippi, against the advice of his new friends who have been very helpful to his change over to his new life. Recently the FBI had delivered evidence that proved a black man had been kidnapped and lynched in Hattiesburg, Mississippi, yet the Pearl River County Grand Jury failed to return any indictments or even consider the provided information.

Although Griffin found it relatively pleasant in New Orleans, at the train/bus station, his experience was one of pure hatred. The woman who sold his ticket to him, almost would not. She gave him the “hate stare” and when she did finally change his $10 bill, she threw his change and ticket at him, instead of handing it to him or placing it on the counter. Although the depot was large and empty, except for a porter and one white man, that man also gave him the “hate stare” making it obvious he was not welcome. The porter, who was black, showed him to the crowded, COLORED CAFE located behind the depot.

While traveling into Mississippi the black people seemed to become more caring, as if they were a buffer for the hatred from the white folks, this was a common occurrence everywhere Griffin went. When the bus would stop, the driver would allow the white people off but not the black people for bathroom breaks. Griffen noted that farm animals are given more grace. As they came closer to Hattiesburg, a woman was happy to warn Griffen to never look at a white woman, “look at the ground or to the side.” He wasn’t even to look at a picture of a woman at the movie theater or in a magazine.

Another black man advised him of a safe place to stay and offered to check in with him in the morning. Griffen was impressed by his kindness but he was scared. He was intimidated by the white boys driving by and yelling at him and other people on the street. The squalor of the room, the fear he felt, it was so great that he felt he couldn’t even write a letter to his white wife and this led him to reach out to a journalist friend that lived in the area that he thought might take him in.

The journalist was glad to have him. His viewpoint in his writings left he and his family isolated and he enjoyed having Griffen help him with his writing, but Griffen could not rest there, and he couldn’t do what he set out to do there. Before his friend brought him back to New Orleans, they visited Dillard University (November 16). As kind as his friend was to him, he was different around “real” black people: “Did you ever see such a damn beautiful campus for a bunch of niggers? They’re getting uppityer and uppiter.” This viewpoint was shockingly different from the abolitionist and advocate he portrayed in his work and personal life, working for equal voting rights.

This way of making an exception for a black person you know but not the entire race is another way that prejudice can hide in plain sight and I think it still thrives today. I believe fear comes in all colors and if we aren’t willing to look at it and call it what it is, we will never become enlightened.We will remain afraid, small and unable to change.

“The whites frequently walk into colored restrooms, Scotch-tape these notices to the wall. This man offered his services free to any Negro woman over 20, offered to pay, on an ascending scale, from $2 for a nineteen-year-old girl, up to $7.50 for a fourteen-year-old and more for perversion dates. He gave a contact point for later in the evening and urged any Negro man who wanted to earn $5 for himself to find him a date within this price category…To the Negro who sees the element of the white man’s nature — and he sees it much more often than any other — the white man’s comments about the Negro’s alleged “immorality” rings maidenly hollow.” John Howard Griffin, Black Like Me, November 16 excerpt

Believe it or not, this is not the most deplorable example of degrading actions that white men portrayed against black men and women, yet it explains how a black women could feel she is only worthy as a sex object and how men are supposed to use and abuse that part of her, instead of honoring and respecting her. I know that so many people have grown beyond this. I do know that 1960 happened 62 years ago and I see a lot of growth that I am thankful for but I also see where we haven’t changed too. Areas were poverty and crime prevail women and men still violate and dishonor each other every day. It is like the self-hatred has been passed down through generations and gotten stronger.

As Griffen traveled through the South, he often hitchhiked. This was common during this time and he was most often picked up by white men who wanted to fill their sexual deviant minds with questions they thought were acceptable to ask this man because he was black or COLORED as was the term used at the time. One young college man was surprised that Griffen could tell him that black people were parents just like white people and they wanted their children to grow up healthy and remain virgins as long as possible just like white parents. It impressed him, but not enough to stop him from asking Griffen to show himself to him. Another man became violent and threatened to kill him when Griffen would not answer his vile questions.

Money was another way that black people were controlled. Gas taxes paid by all were used to maintain beaches black people were not allowed to use. Stores would offer credit to black families, yet it seemed like fees were always added so that they could never be paid off so the families were always so poor they could barely afford to improve their homes or clothe their children.

One man that picked up Griffen, brought him home with him, he was positive that there was nowhere safe for him to stay for the night. He let him know that he only had 2 bedrooms and 6 children but he could have the floor and it was clean. Griffen had bought a loaf of bread and a few candy bars before he was picked up. When they reached the man’s home Griffen met the man’s wife and children. She was happy to meet him and happy all her children were healthy, she mentioned that many families had children that were blind or maimed in some way, Her husband was a little embarrassed in his meager home and plain dinner of beans with no meat but Griffen praised his beautiful and obviously healthy children until the father beamed. He offered the bread and they enjoyed a feast. They sliced up the candy bars for dessert and were thankful. This experience really made Griffen appreciate how hard this man worked for his family.

Within a week Griffen could no longer handle being black all the time and stopped taking the medication that was keeping him dark. He applied a dye to his skin when he was prepared to enter society as a black man that would wash off when he had had enough. So much of society was shut off to him as a black man. He spent most of his time walking, worrying about what bench or park he could sit in, what bathroom he could use, what fountain he could drink from, if there was a colored cafe nearby where he could get a bite to eat. All of these things were few and far between. In more religious areas, whites were sometimes more gentle but there was always a line that Griffen had to be aware of in order to keep the peace. There were no jobs he could have. They were either taken or being weeded out by communities that were purposely making it impossible for black people to survive there before the equality laws were passed. White men said these things to him like they were telling him the prices of a bushel of apples.

When Griffen returned home, he was overjoyed to see his wife and 3 children but even his publisher offered him an out. He did not have to publish anything about his adventure. But Griffen was committed to sharing what he had learned. With that came what he was expecting. Hatred. Threats. Quiet gratitude. In the end his family and his parents had to move from their Texas home to New Mexico to be free from the violent calls and threats but Griffen remained faithful to his truth and he had gained respect from many people of all colors.

In no way have I shared the entire story. I think you should read this book. I think you will absorb it differently than I did. I am very glad I walked into Storyboard Delights on Karen’s arm last month and found it on the used book shelf. This book has helped me understand a few things about my wife, things that I always loved but made me really respect her even more for, about the way she responds to people. Her humility and servant attitude are skin deep and I know that some of it is learned behavior from being a mixed girl child of the south. Not just black, not just white, not just Native American…with those freckles and too much pride. I know she has lived through trauma and when she is too tired to hide it, I meet a girl that has been hurt. I have a friend that moved to Arkansas and she often tells me I should move there and how much I would love it. I don’t think I would, but more importantly, and I finally told her this: my wife is a mulatto female that worked really hard to leave the south, and although I would like to visit, I don’t ever see us moving there. I think she finally understood.

I live in a town that is 87% white. In Longview, Washington 10% of the population is mixed and all other races are less than 2%. I have been thinking about this for a few days. Actually I have been thinking about this off and on for quite some time because my wife has eluded to it a couple times. I have come to the conclusion that there are lots of reasons people of color would move here. I am glad they did. When I was growing up here, I bet Longview was more like 97% white and I enjoy seeing the diversity. I like seeing change. I made a comment that I don’t care what color a person is, but it is more than that. it isn’t that I don’t care about a person’s color, because what I care about is the person’s heart. I love to learn about their culture, beliefs and who they are. I do think dark skin is more beautiful than white skin but my wife says that is just a preference…I think she is correct.

Black Like Me by John Howard Griffin showed me that there were many types of people: hateful people, enlightened people, and complacent people and they come in all colors. I don’t care what color you are, what I really care about is how open you are to becoming enlightened; letting go of fear and embracing love, peace and freedom. I am not perfect. I can say I probably have a mix of all three characteristics in me, but I hope I am more enlightened than I used to be. I do know that next time someone asks me if I am prejudiced, instead of being defensive or fighting with them, I am willing to saying, “Let me consider that. Thank you for bringing that to my attention.”

Buy your own copy of Black Like Me by John Howard Griffin on Amazon

~

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Book Review: A Return to Love by Marianne Williamson

I bought A Return to Love back when Marianne Williamson was running for president in 2020 but I didn’t get around to reading it until now. I actually think I wasn’t ready to read it until this time in my life and I am really glad I was able to absorb it in this time where I am better able, and trying to forgive more, putting effort into unlearning fear, and learning to love better. I really enjoyed this book and I highly recommend it to a mature reader and a mature Christian or person who is comfortable in their beliefs.

The book I have is actually two books in one: A Return to Love and The Gift of Change, both by Marianne Williamson. There was so much to absorb in A Return to Love that I chose to do two different book reviews. I haven’t read the second book yet but I will do a separate book review for The Gift of Change when I have completed reading that book.

Marianne begins A Return to Love by explaining that she was raised in a Jewish home and has studied many religions. She also set aside her beliefs for some time and now is a Christian. Although her writing leaves room for any higher power, she refers openly to God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit as her belief system and some people might be offended by this.

“The spiritual journey is the relinquishment — or unlearning of fear and the acceptance of love back into our hearts. Love is the essential existential fact. It is our ultimate reality and our purpose on earth. To be consciously aware of it, to experience love in ourselves and others, is the meaning of life.” Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love

Commonly throughout the book Marianne writes that people undervalue what we know to be true in our hearts and overvalue the things our physical senses can see. We do this because love is hard to see because love is an energy that is experienced through kindness, giving, mercy, compassion, peace, joy, acceptance, non-judgement, joining and intimacy. Fear is the opposite of love and gives a false testimony to the meaningless of love. Fear looks like anger, abuse, disease, pain, greed, addiction, selfishness, obsession, corruption, violence and war. Love is threatening to our ego because it is simple.

Concepts Discussed in this Book:

  • Love is the only reality.
  • Fear is the opposite of love.
  • Fear is an alternative reality.…no wonder we all feel crazy…
  • Forgiveness transforms fear to love.
  • Ego wants to judge.
  • Holy Spirit wants to accept people as they are and provides room for compassion.

“The places in our personality where we tend to deviate from love are not our faults, but our wounds.” Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love

“Forgiveness is the choice to see people as they are now. When we are angry at people, we are angry because of something they said or did before this moment. But what people said or did is not who they are. Relationships are reborn as we let go of the perceptions of our brother’s pasts. ‘By bringing the past into the present, we create a future just like the past.’ By letting the past go, we make room for miracles.” Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love

All negativity comes from fear. Anger, rudeness, manipulation, cruelty all comes from fear. Forgiveness transforms them all. Pain doesn’t come from the love we don’t give others but from the love we choose not to give. So the answer is to ask the Holy Spirit to change our perspective and help us forgive. When we close our heart in response to other people’s choices we hurt ourself but when we remain able to give love we see a miracle.

According to A Return to Love and my personal experience, the world has taught us to fear. This is unnatural to humans because we were created in God’s image and love is the only real emotion. This is what we have to return to  — to live in love and let go of fear. When we are feeling angry or annoyed with people we can confess this to the Holy Spirit, who wants to help us, and we will see the help we need, whether it is more compassion or forgiveness, or whatever is needed in the moment.

Steps to Process Change:

  1. See my dysfunctional patterns
  2. Confess and ask God to take them
  3. Commit to change

“Personal growth can be painful because it can make us feel ashamed and humiliated to face our own darkness. But the goal of personal growth is the journey from dark emotional patterns that cause us pain to those that create peace.” Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love

When someone hurts use we can blow up at them or we can forgive them. Here is a helpful prayer to repeat until you are not longer angry:

“I forgive you  _________________, and I release you to the Holy Spirit.”

This is a simple and very powerful prayer because it acknowledges that you know that God loves you and this person and wants the best for both of you. It also proclaims your trust in the Holy Spirit. I have tried this prayer out on many people and even with forgiving myself with some pretty powerful responses.

“…there is nothing we have been through or seen, or done, that cannot be used to make our lives more valuable now. We can grow from any experience, and we can transcend any experience. This kind of talk is blasphemy to the ego, which respects pain, glorifies pain, worships pain, and creates pain. Pain is its centerpiece. It sees forgiveness as its enemy.” Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love

Our only real pleasure will come when we do what God created us to do. We must ask Him to help us be an instrument of His peace and use the abilities He gave us to spread love.

“…as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we’re liberated from our fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love

Trusting God is like trusting gravity. 2 points to remember:

  1. God’s plan works
  2. Mine doesn’t

“It is our humility, our desire to be of service, that makes us stars. Not our arrogance.”  Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love

We can only receive God’s plan. If we add anything to it we take away the little that was asked of us. We are only to align ourself with God’s plan. He will make it happen. This is a very anti-world mindset. But it can be done.

“Dear God, I surrender this situation to you. May it be used for your purposes. I ask only that my heart be open to give love and to receive love. May all the results unfold according to Your will. Amen.” Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love

Another important concept that is talked about in A Return to Love are that we are interrelated but we have forgotten that because our ego supports a mentality where instead of “we” we talk about “my career”, “my money” or “my life.” But we are not separate. This falsely created separateness leads us to mistake where we put our devotion — our stuff instead of our love, relationships and our higher power.

We hear people say to us to feel our feelings, which is important, but they are usually referring to fear, pain, shame, all the negative emotions, but we also need to feel all the positive ones too: love, satisfaction, joy… The ego does not like positive thoughts and works against them but our natural inheritance is to enjoy the good in our lives, especially if it is small. There is nothing wrong with being too happy.

Love is not just sentimental mush on a greeting card. It is a practiced discipline of defying our ego’s voice. It is relying on the Holy Spirit and focusing on the our capacity to love by training our minds to the habits of loving.

Today’s goal is peace. I should have that tattooed somewhere.

Buy your own copy of A Return to Love and The Gift of Change by Marianne Williamson on Amazon

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Face the Illness so you can Enjoy the Healing

Note: The article was originally by Summer D Clemenson and posted on WellnessWorksNW.com

I am always amazed to hear of a person that is ashamed of their illness, especially mental illness. The stigma of chronic illness is almost as debilitating as the actual illness, in my opinion, but it doesn’t have to be. I am often told that I am amazingly transparent and for some people that is scary as hell and for others, that is refreshing. I come from people that are super private about medical histories and this is not good. We should not be afraid to talk about these things. In fact I would like to encourage you to face the illness so you can enjoy the healing. (more…)

How Do You Identify?

I don’t talk a lot about my membership in the Queer Community because my realization that I am part of it is so new to me. I know some people cringe at the word queer but LGBTQIA+ is hard to say and even harder to remember and my wife, Karen G Clemenson, had an aneurysm many years ago and some things just don’t stick easily with her so I made the decision that we would use the word queer and if someone wants to know why we use it we can say we are too old to remember all the letters. But truly, even though we tend to be more conservative than most of our fellow queer folks, we were voting for same sex marriage long before we even knew we wanted to marry each other.

All the letters have a meaning though and they are all important:

  • LLesbian (women who are attracted to women sexually)
  • GGay (men who are attracted to men sexually)
  • BBisexual (a person that is attracted to both men and women sexually)
  • TTranssexual (a person that experiences a gender identity that is different than the one assigned to them at birth; this has nothing to do with their sexual orientation)
  • QQueer (umbrella term for sexual or gender minorities)
  • I – Intersex (people who were born with several sex characteristics including chromosome patterns, gonads or genitals)
  • A Asexual (a person with a low or absent interest in sexual desire towards others)
  • + – (Anyone else including Pansexual; a person that may be attracted to men, women or trans people, Polyamorous; multiple romantic relationships with the consent of everyone involved…and anyone not listed…)

I am actual Demisexual which technically falls under the scope of Asexual. Basically demisexual people do not feel romantic interest until a strong emotional bond has been built. For me, gender doesn’t matter but I am never in a hurry to develop a sexual relationship and I would never consider a relationship beyond my marriage. I am not wired that way. My wife really likes that about me.

When it comes to gender I am a Cis-Female. That means I was identified as female at birth and I agree that I am a female. But I know people that were born one gender who identify as another gender. Like my friend Rae. Rae was born female but now is Non-Binary. Rae’s pronouns are now They/Them. One of Karen’s clients was born male but is now in the midst of transitioning to female. This client is a Trans-Female and her pronouns are She and Her.

Today I Want to Talk More About Transsexual People

Confusing, isn’t it? Don’t worry. Rae promises me it is much less hard for me to learn their new pronouns than it is for them to transition. I trust them that they would know better than I would. You see, I don’t have to understand. I just have to love them and treat them with respect. Even if I mess up and use the wrong pronouns, if I just apologize and treat them kindly, usually people are going to forgive me because I am not judging them or treating them poorly, I am not scared of them and I am looking them in the eye and trying to do my best to connect with them.

Did you know that Washington State has anti-discrimination laws that clearly prohibits unjust or prejudicial treatment based on gender expression or identity? These laws protect people in places that serve the public like public schools, restaurants, hotels, renting, buying and selling homes, employment (especially state, municipal and private workplaces with more than 8 employees), credit transactions and insurance transactions. These laws protect people from violence and threats, harassment, intimidation and bullying motivated by gender expression or actual and perceived gender identity.

Trans-Students have the right to join in and play in interscholastic athletics according to the Washington Interscholastic Activities Association, which states that students should be allowed to participate in physical education and athletic activities in a manner that is consistent with their gender identity. If school leadership is not supporting their students they are violating the Equal Protection Clause of the federal Constitution, where schools are responsible for protecting the rights of all students.

If your school is not supporting you or your student you have options please see:

As you may have guessed it, I was fueled by something to write this article. I have a friend named, Roger, who recently shared with me that he has a friend that is having to travel outside his school district because he is not being supported at his school and The Daily News won’t write anything about this story. I told Roger I would, but I got impatient. So I started doing a little research and found out that our state has been working hard to make it a safer place for Trans and Queer folks to live…

In February of 2016 Senate Bill 6443 was defeated in Washington State, making it illegal to harassing based on gender identity or sexual orientation, give LGBT employees fewer benefits or deny people access to restrooms consistent to their gender identity under the law.

In April of 2021 Senate Bill 5313 was passed banning health insurance discrimination. This law made it illegal for insurance companies to refuse covering gender confirming treatments to minors on the basis that they felt it was for cosmetic reasons. This is important because a study found that the trans population could be subject to minority stress and societal stigma which is the cause of mental health disorders without the proper support.

These are all great steps forward for all of us because if one person is made free, we are all made more free and freedom is a beautiful thing. It is what so many United States military have laid down their lives for and I would never want to cheapen that by someone who is afraid. I understand that some people might be afraid of things you don’t understand or know about so I suggest that you ask questions. You can ask me questions. If I don’t know the answers, I know where to find them. RAINS is a great resource and their board is made of kind and loving people that want to support us all with education and resources.

When it comes down to it. Shouldn’t we try to make it easier and not harder for our kids to get a good education, no matter what their gender identity is?

More Information

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Better Habits: Refrigerator Stone Ground Oats Recipe

Regardless of what your food philosophy is or what diet plan you follow or don’t, eating is important. Babies that don’t learn to latch on properly at birth are labeled failure to thrive and have a hard path in front of them and people with food issues do too. I was raised with several food issues and I have spent about 20 years trying to reteach myself better habits.

Breakfast is a hard one, especially because my wife, Karen, works swing shift and doesn’t come home until at least midnight sometimes and I like to eat dinner with her so we don’t often get to bed until 2 or 3 am. So my normal breakfast time is not the normal breakfast time but really breakfast is really just the idea of breaking a fast so it doesn’t matter what time it happens.

I also don’t wake up easily. I hate waking up. I am grumpy and in pain so making breakfast is not something I want to do. I tend to batch cook so we always have something ready to eat in the fridge. Karen is an action person and she is always coming and going so I often have hard boiled eggs, a frittata and maybe a soup or stew in the fridge. Sometimes we can’t get a hold of farm fresh eggs and my body can’t process store bought ones. I also can’t eat a lot of gluten, sugar and since I have been on megestrol for my cancer treatment, I can’t eat avocados, coffee, tea with caffeine and most recently spinach and wild rice…I was craving Cream of Wheat a few months ago but knew I couldn’t have that. When I did a search I found they had a gluten free option, Cream of Rice. I purchased it and found that I hated it when I made it with water but if I made it with almond milk, I loved it…but starting that day with that many carbs was causing me to crave carbs all day. That wasn’t working for me either.

I had some organic gluten free rolled oats but those just seemed so heavy and for some reason they didn’t stay with me. Did you know that if you purchase oats that don’t say gluten free that they might have gluten in them? I didn’t know that but I sure could feel it sometimes. I like cereal in the morning so I kept thinking. Then I remembered that I had bought stone ground oats and had loved them in the past. I knew they took a lot longer to cook than rolled oats so I started Googling. I found that they had protein, fiber, potassium, iron and calcium while the rice really only had carbs…and I could soak them overnight and get the same effect as cooking them. How exciting!

Summer’s Refrigerator Stone Ground Oats Recipe

  • 1 Glass Quart Sized Jar with the lid
  • 2 cups Organic Gluten Free Stone Ground Oats
  • 2 cups Raisins
  • Organic Ground Cinnamon
  • Sea Salt
  • Unsweetened Vanilla Almond Milk

I don’t really measure anything. I use the measurements on the side of the jar but I don’t get out any tools.

  1. Add half a jar of oats.
  2. I turn the cinnamon upside down in the jar and slap the bottom 30 times (or as much as you like).
  3. I guestimate about 1 tsp sea salt.
  4. I fill the rest of the jar with raisins.
  5. I close the jar really tight and shake it really good.
  6. Open the jar and fill it with Almond Milk (or whatever type of milk you like).
  7. Put the lid on really tight and give it a really good shake. Refrigerate overnight.

In the morning…or whenever you enjoy your oats…

In a bowl that holds at least 2 cups add 4 tsps of oats from the jar and then add as much milk as you like. Heat on high for 2 minutes in the microwave. Stir and enjoy.

You should have 5 adult servings. Adjust for smaller eaters.

These oats are super filling! They have a luscious texture so if you are used to butter in your oats, you won’t miss it. There is just enough salt to accent the sweetness of the oats, cinnamon and raisins that you won’t miss the sugar so you won’t need to add more than what is naturally occurring in the food. I hope you enjoy this as much as I do.

Today was a great day!

Today has been a very productive day. I was really feeling down a couple weeks ago. I was starting to abuse myself because I felt like I had given up on everything I like to do, even writing and then I realized that although I hadn’t been updating my blog, I had taken to writing long Facebook posts and even dating them. For the last two weeks I have been going through all those posts from back in October when I got my cancer diagnosis and reading them. The ones that were good enough for the blog are now here…and that is most of them.

I learned a lot. I have gone through a lot. There is a reason I am exhausted. I shouldn’t let my mind tell me I am lazy or unmotivated. I am sick and I probably a little shell shocked. I am mourning losses and yet I am growing.

My phone phobia is getting worse. I can send small books via text or messenger but I can barely speak to people I love on the phone. It is very hard to talk to doctor offices. I am glad that most of the time, Karen makes those calls for me. I think that is why I feel like I failed so badly with my neurologist. I tried to communicate well with him but he was not able to reciprocate. I did not call on Monday like I said I would. I chickened out. But I did call today and I was put through to an answering machine where I explained my phone phobia and let them know that I would try really hard to answer the phone when they called back but even with all the worrying about that. They never did call back.

My primary called today. I could not make myself answer, at the time, but I did make myself call back. They were responding to my email about some tummy trouble I had for about a week. Luckily, when Karen called to reschedule my post-op appointment with my oncologist because of this uncontrollable issue, they put her directly through to the nurse who advised her that my meds were probably causing my issue and I realized that the the spinach and wild rice in the stew I had made were different than what I normally ate and when I stopped eating it, my problem went way…poor Karen has had a lot of that stew to eat on her own…So even though I was tongue-tied when I called I communicated to the person on the phone that I appreciated them calling to set up an appointment, but that the problem had subsided with the guidance of my oncology nurse, and was an issue caused due to a side effect of a medication I take for my cancer treatment, I was happy to keep my regularly scheduled checkup appointment scheduled for next month. She eventually caught up with me.

I am so much better in writing…

Yesterday was a blessing too! I was contacted by Heather at RAINS who was concerned because she had contacted Karen about a grant that was available for her. Heather let me know that both of us could apply and we should apply soon. What a blessing! So of course, I applied for both of us. We live in such a great community!

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Knowing is a Process

This article is based on my opinion as well as information I gained through web series I took part in in July of 2020 called LGBTQ+ Cultural Competency Workshop. This workshop was sponsored by Lambert House, Healing Bridge, PFLAG, PFLAG SW WA, Connect BG and Wonderfully Made. You may want skip this article if you don’t like people who might be different from you.

I owe someone an apology.

God please help me write this the way my heart is feeling it because for some reason it seems so hard.

Years ago I met a person who was trying to tell me something about themself, but I could not hear them. I still thought the world was very black and white. I am not sure where I learned this but it was a reality for me. Black and white thinking is not very inclusive.

The definition of inclusiveness is an aura or environment of letting people in and making them feel welcome.
An example of inclusiveness is when you make your home a comfortable place for all of your friends, family, guests and people you meet.

When we are thinking about whether or not you are practicing being inclusive we need to ask ourselves some questions: 

  • What needs to be in place so that you are comfortable around someone?
  • Do you like to be ignored?
  • Do you enjoy when other’s people’s opinions are forced upon you because they can’t understand you?

These are universal questions. When you have the answer for yourself, the next step is to consider whether you are giving what you need to others in an open-handed way that allows them the freedom to express themselves. One thing, I think is universally true is that people like to be heard. They don’t like to be invited into someone’s space, and have no room to be themselves, be allowed to speak and be empathized with.

I know it the past I was not able to hear people who were trying to express that they had a burden and they wanted to share it with me. They were not asking me to hold it for them or take it from them, they just wanted to show it to me and know that they were safe with me to just sit in their honesty.

Do you know how I know this? As I have gotten older, I came to the realization that I had to know my identity; the one I was born with that maybe I didn’t know how to look at or foster in myself. This same identity that maybe no one else knew how to look at it or foster, or they just didn’t want to.

Read: A Letter to a Younger Me – AKA 16 Things I Know

What I have come to understand is that my identity is mine and it includes many aspects: dreams, beliefs & philosophies, sex, gender identity, gender expression, orientation are only a few and each one has their own importance. These aspects can only be identified by me and no one else, just as I can only listen and hear what others are saying to me and choose what I will do with it.

Many years ago, I had a conversation with someone about their gender identity. I can’t seem to shake it. I think about it often so I decided to sit with what I know. What I came up with is this: I didn’t let them tell me their truth without interrupting them and defining them in my black and white knowledge.

I was wrong.

I am sorry.

I don’t want to do this anymore.

I know there are people, who will say: Summer, you are a Christian. How can you not tell people the truth?

My answer is this: Jesus is the truth and the life. It is His job to define my identity and salvation. It is His job to change people. It is not my job to tell people their truth. It is my job to love people with Christ’s love. If He thinks they are wrong, He will show them in His amazing way. But who am I to define someone else?

Now, before someone says: Summer, what about people who are breaking the law? I am not talking about that, I am talking about someone’s identity. If someone else’s identity is hurting me, than I might really have a problem within myself, not them. I know I used to have issues with other people’s identity and, for me, it was because I didn’t know my own identity because I had never thought to consider it and what makes me who I am.

For the last 20 years or so, I have looked at myself as honestly as I can. I have questioned myself. I have questioned God about myself. I am sure I will keep doing this for the rest of my life, since the bible says that if I believe Jesus is the Son of God, than He abides in me (1 John 4:15), and I want to know Jesus, and that is a relationship that was created before the foundation of the world (Romans 8:29) and it will definitely not end any time soon.

What have a learned? I have learned that I am always changing. I am always thinking and learning. To be the same would mean that I was stagnant and I never want to be that. The only thing that never changes is Christ’s love in me…but what that means to me and how I react to it that just keeps getting deeper and deeper…

Be as well as you can be, my friends…

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Amen

The Lord is with you always.

Note: If you leave comments that are not open-minded questions or statements we can discuss in order to better understand each other, calmly and in a loving manner and you do not include your name and email address, to facilitate conversation, you will not see them posted on this blog. I welcome conversations and questions, but I will not be abused and I will not allow abusive language on my personal blog. If you read something you don’t like on my blog, please pray for me.

What is Mindfulness?

We hear the word mindful so often, it is almost a constant reminder, but what is Mindfulness? Being mindful is a verb that describes a practice of paying attention to what is happening now. Being mindful is something that is naturally part of ourselves, whether we choose to cultivate it or not. What we are doing, what we are feeling and what we are thinking are all parts of practicing mindfulness. This practice is best learned during active, daily practice. When we observe our thoughts, feelings and actions we are learning about ourselves without judging why we think, feel or do things the way we do them. What we observe is neither good or bad in the moment, this observation is meant to teach us what we do and how we do it as we respond to the things we can’t control, like the weather, other people’s behaviors or any other factor that we can only respond to. (more…)

The Pros and Pros of Workplace Wellness Plans

There are really no cons when we are considering Workplace Wellness Plans. There is something special that is created when ‘I’ becomes ‘we.’ Companies that foster their employee’s wellness can creatively encourage healthy competition among their staff and not only see better health in their workforce but create a workplace where people work together. At Rightline Equipment in Rainier, Oregon they often have wellness contests, like weight loss contests. This encourages employees to eat healthier and work together to implement healthy habits among themselves and while they do this they support each other to reach their personal goals. This not only leads people to change their lifestyle but they get sick less often and miss less work time. (more…)

Learning About FODMAPs Foods

FODMAP stands for Fermentable Oligo-, Di-, Mono-saccharides and Polyols. All these scientific terms are used to describe groups of fermentable carbohydrates that commonly trigger bloating, gas and stomach pain in people with sensitivities.

The main dietary sources of the four groups of FODMAPs include:

  • Oligosaccharides: Wheat, rye, legumes and various fruits and vegetables, such as garlic and onions.
  • Disaccharides: Milk, yogurt and soft cheese. Lactose is the main carbohydrate.
  • Monosaccharides: Various fruit including figs and mangos, and sweeteners such as honey and agave nectar. Fructose is the main carb.
  • Polyols: Certain fruits and vegetables including blackberries and lychee, as well as some low-calorie sweeteners like those found in sugar-free gum.

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Learning About Cannabis for Pain

Cannabis can be a very powerful tool in use as a pain reliever for those suffering with chronic pain and illness. Cannabis works alongside our nervous system to block certain pain receptors. This is key to living a good life with chronic pain. It may not be the way for everyone, but it was a game changer for me.

What is our Nervous System?

Our nervous system is a complex collection of nerves and specialized cells known as neurons. These neurons send signals between different parts of our body, telling them what to do. Our nervous system is like our body’s electrical wiring. (more…)

Learning About Talcum Powder

What is Talcum Powder

Talcum Powder is made from talc. Talc is a mineral that contains magnesium, silicon and oxygen. In its natural state, some talc also contains asbestos. Talc that has been purified from asbestos is generally what is used in consumer products.

The reason talcum powder is used is that it absorbs moisture well and helps cut down on friction so it is good for helping to keep skin dry and prevent rashes; which is why it is often found in baby powder and adult body and facial powders. (more…)

Love Your Guts

It is an act of love to choose wellness. Wellness is a series of positive, life supporting decisions we make, or don’t make everyday, all day long. Being well takes proper nutrition, exercise, a good attitude and the practice of hobbies and activities that bring us satisfaction and joy. Sometimes our path to wellness requires a wellness facilitator; sometimes it includes medication and counseling. Many of us have a road in front of us that includes chronic illness which produces its own challenges. A main component of our health is our immune system, sometimes referred to as our second brain or our digestive system. No matter what you need to Love Your Guts! (more…)

30 THANKFUL Things to EXCLAIM

downtown longview waAs we slipped into November Karen and I have been very busy but I was sure we needed to EXCLAIM something…so as she fell asleep at my feet last night, I again, asked her what we should write about. Struggling to open her eyes, she said, “Why don’t we EXCLAIM Thanksgiving?”

Just minutes earlier, she had talked me into turning off The Late Show and going to bed, but fell asleep before she could make her dreams come true…or move so I could get off the couch without having to climb over her. In those few moments, my brain turned back on and reminded me that I never run out of things to do. So with some grumbling, “Do we have to do this now? Oh, I missed my chance!” Karen and I came up with 30 things we are so THANKFUL for in Longview, Washington.
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Survival Drive 2015

It’s that time of year again! Living Ministries launched SURVIVAL DRIVE 2015 on October 1st! It will last the entire month of October. We have been glad to donate the flyer design every year and hope that year number 3 is the most successful!

It is hard to live on the streets. That statement does not contain that anxiety, fear, stress and physical demands that being homeless actually include. Believe it or not most people who are homeless are mentally ill…or they actually have a job but it doesn’t pay the bills. We have decided to give donations to Love Overwhelming this year but look forward to blessing other organizations that help people in the future.

Living Ministries is not a 501(c)3 organization this year. If you are interested in receiving tax benefits, we encourage you to make your check out to Love Overwhelming…we just want to know how much we were able to help raise this year. (more…)

Living Ministries Survival Drive 2014

Living Ministries Survival Drive 2014Sock Drive & Fundraiser

Our favorite nonprofit is at again! We are excited to EXCLAIM the 2nd Annual Survival Drive, facilitated by Living Ministries.

Survival Drive 2014 will run from October 13th to October 31st. Living Ministries will collect socks and money to give to Love Overwhelming.

Love Overwhelming is a local nonprofit that serves Cowlitz County as the facilitator of Coordinated Entry. People requiring assistance from a number of socio-economic needs should go through their resource case managers for referral. Love Overwhelming also manages an urban rest stop, or Daily Living Essential Cafe, where anyone experiencing homelessness or in danger of experiencing homelessness can come and be safe, have access to restrooms, showers, laundry services and basic living essential items.
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Christmas Joy Telethon 2013

Christmas Joy TelethonAs Friday December 13th draws closer Karen starts to buzz and hum. Everything is a reason to “Get Her Christmas On.” If you don’t like Christmas music and movies you should keep your distance….Move FAR, FAR AWAY before she breaks into her operatic version of Santa Claus is Coming to Town….

Between Karen and her Co-Host Ray Baker we are sure to have a JOYous time!

Talking about making lists and checking them twice, I had heard that there are some great musicians that are joining us at The Electric Bean for Christmas Joy Telethon! Raeann Phillips is opening the show, followed by Mending Hope, Paul Mauer, Tom Stiltz, CR Band and the evening will come to an end with worship led by Paul Lopez.

Joining as sponsors are Amanda Wilson Portraiture, Prographyx, The Electric Bean, Valley Bugler Newspaper, Rightway RV, Canyonview Cyclery & Copies Today Speedy Litho.
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These Are A Few of My Favorite Things

Exclaim my favorite thingsToday is a beautiful day!

The sun is out. There are enough clouds in the sky that there is a wonderful baby blue glow around the buildings and I am enjoying the sound of people chatting and the glorious sound of coffee being made as I sit at a table in the middle of The Electric Bean; a fellow sponsor of Christmas Joy Telethon.

Karen says her favorite thing about The EB is that it is a perfect place to plug in. Whether you are taking a break from the office, you’re out and about enjoying Kelso-Longview or you came to a great concert, this place delivers the unique essence of our local people. And it is a great place for a meeting!
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The Bag Party 2013

The Bag Party 2013How much fun can you pack in a minute! Well guess how much more you can pack in 3 hours! Living Ministries and sponsors put together The Bag Party benefit concert for Hearts For Homeless and Love Overwhelming in January 2013.

>>>Learn more about The Bag Party

“The Bag Party was the perfect chance to tell people about Hearts For Homeless and Love Overwhelming. These organizations do so much for people and most of it is behind the scenes. The reason they spend hours volunteering is to make sure that people experiencing homelessness have the basics.” Karen Gidderon

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