Nana is Still in My Heart

I asked God to help me not say fuck
when you are here
I remember when Casey was 3
and I told him not to say that same word
around you because it hurt your feelings

I know the same God that
helped me quit smoking
and who loves you more than me
will help me find other words to use around you
And not because Nana would disapprove

Nana is with Jesus now
and the things that trip up humans
are not holding her back anymore
She understands the roar in my ears
The constant pain I live in
The distractions and worries that keep my hand at my throat
just like her when she was here
The ambitions I have to choose from because
I only have so many spoons and pennies

I learned so much from Nana while she was here
She taught me how to live
She taught me manners and how to love
She taught me about choice and family
But now she is gone and I am learning to walk without her

But Nana is still in my heart

Note: I wrote this poem on 9/10/2026 but I misplaced it and it took me a while to find it

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