Holiday Peace and Joy

by Summer D Clemenson | Dec 14, 2022 | Essential Oils, Life, Marketing, Opinions

Merry Christmas! I wish you Holiday Peace and Joy at this beautiful time of year that is celebrated for many reasons by many types of people and religions and I hope you all feel blessed.

I want to tell you a cute story about my cat. I have been using Certified Pure Grade Essential Oils for 11 years and I am not sure how many times I have been asked if they are safe for cats but, as a person who has been learning as I went, so has my cat. Xavier (pronounced Javier) is very much like his particular and opinionated mommy. He likes things the way he likes them and when Xavier is not happy, no one is happy. I am used to getting up at least once in the night to give him his 5 am feeding (he has IBS and is a compulsive eater) and love on him which is just as important for my anxious little guy. We play music at night because Xavier demands it but he has also grown accustomed to the diffuser.

The other night was not like other nights: We had cuddled. He had been fed. I made sure the bathtub was slowly dripping (he wont drink sitting water). The music was still playing and I was trying to separate myself to go back to bed but Xavier would not have it. He sat on the floor looking at me and grunting until I realized that the diffuser had gone dry.

After I was done laughing; I mean what else can you do? I refilled the defuser and put On Guard in it…that is his favorite oil. How do I know? He will lay on the floor beneath the diffuser for a bit and then run around the room and play and then come back to the diffuser and take a nap…

So the main rule is that the cat needs to be able to get away from the oil. Don’t apply oils to the cat directly or give them to the cat internally. Wash your hands after you have been working with oils to keep them from licking the oils off your hands. Cats have very different metabolisms than humans do and ingesting certain oils can be lethal. But diffusing is the safest way to use oils around cats because they are diluted by the water.

Now back to Holiday Peace and Holiday Joy…These are seasonal oils that doTERRA puts out and they are lovely. Here is my trick. I have never made a point of buying both of them until this year and when I got them I tried them in the diffuser individually and thought they were lovely but what I really enjoyed was putting them together with a little Peppermint…that was the Golden Ticket. Talk about smelling the holidays! I highly suggest this combination!

If you have any questions about Certified Pure Grade Essential Oils please Contact Me.

From my family to yours, we hope that you are blessing during this season.

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Christian, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information.

If you are interested in becoming a Christian…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Book Review: Little Women by Louisa May Alcott

by Summer D Clemenson | Dec 13, 2022 | Book & Product Reviews, Life, Opinions

The first time I read Little Women by Louisa May Alcott, I was about 9-years-old. I was visiting my aunt and uncle in Massachusetts and I had brought it along with me. It was a book that my grandmother had bought for my mother and aunt when they were girls. It was the first real chapter book I had really read. I was so excited after I had finished this book the first time that I also read Jack and Jill, also by Louisa May Alcott and a 500 page book about Helen Keller (I don’t remember the name of it), all in a months time. I had been bit by the book bug.

I think it helped that my aunt took my cousins and I to the library every week and we had times where we just looked at books. We had books at my house and like my aunt’s house, we had a big book shelf full of books and baskets with books in them and my mother read to us, but I think the library was the clincher for me. That magical place with so many books. It feels like magic in there for me. I feel excited in a library or a good book store.

I have tried to read this book again but I had trouble getting into it at different times. I don’t have that original copy with me at this time so I tried to download it onto my Kindle, but I have decided I hate reading on my Kindle. It hurts my wrists to hold it up and I don’t want to spend money to find a better case so it is just gathering dust until I decide what to do with it. I like to read real books so after reading The Reading List I was inspired to give Little Women another go and found it at my local library.

I am convinced that the copy of Little Women, that I read 37 years ago, was a condensed copy. First, it was much smaller than this huge book sitting next to me with 520 pages in it. Second, even with accounting for some of my memories being washed away by the many movie versions of this book that I have seen, there are so many details about the characters that I can’t recall at all. Both of these details make me glad that I checked this book out at the library.

That summer I visited in Massachusetts wasn’t just special because I got bit by the reading bug…and many bugs…it is very humid there…but we also went to see The Concord House where the Alcott Family lived. It was very special to see the drawings on the walls, the stories written by Alcott, the music sheets, needlepoint and other arts that that the Alcott Family all created. It made the book come alive to me. I thought about that several times as I read about their adventures.

I loved the intimacy they all held for each other. I love how Alcott took time to develop each character in a specific and loving way. The book was written during the Civil War, yet she doesn’t develop which war it is, just how important it is to support our troops, with all we have. There is gossip of bias between well-off British and United States citizens and the March girls just don’t entertain those thoughts, they just keep moving forward because they don’t have time for such folly. Each disagreement is brought back around to the well-being of their sister or friend in such a generous way, it was so refreshing to read this especially near Christmas time, this may be a book I read again near Christmas more frequently. I believe this book has blessings for anyone who reads it.

I got this book at the Longview Public Library. You can get your own copy of Little Women by Louisa May Alcott on Amazon.

Read My Review on GoodReads:

Little Women by Louisa May Alcott
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I first read this book when I was 9-years-old and 37 years later it still amazing!

View all my reviews

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Book Review: There There a Novel by Tommy Orange

by Summer D Clemenson | Dec 12, 2022 | Book & Product Reviews, Opinions

Among the brokenness, addiction and poverty there sings a sings a song of strength, family and power on every page of There There a Novel by Tommy Orange. I am glad I found this book as I wandered the isles of the library. The stories of 12 Native American people as they traveled through life with little to anchor them were both sad and yet they kept moving forward.

This book left me feeling a lot. I could not bring myself to take notes but just absorb the pain of each character as they went through life disconnected from their past and the legacy of their people, not knowing who was safe to trust or not. I was saddened and reminded of the fact that Black people were just as scared of medical professionals when it came to serious medical conditions because of atrocities that were done against them, as characters in the book let cancer take them without treatment.

In the end, confused children brought the story to a sad end, yet in some way family still prevailed, whether they knew it or not. This book was a powerful read.

I got this book at the Longview Public Library. You can get your own copy of There There a Novel by Tommy Orange on Amazon.

Read My Review on GoodReads:

There There by Tommy Orange
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

This book really pulled at my heart. Tommy Orange successfully created characters that I could believe and love. I could feel their pain and confusion at times, but always their strength.

View all my reviews

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Her Name is Anna

by Summer D Clemenson | Dec 8, 2022 | About Summer, Life, Opinions

I met her in my twenties, when I began really digging to try to find freedom from what was wrong with me mentally and spiritually. I had read somewhere about asking this part of yourself that seemed to be its own personality, questions and having it answer with your non-dominate writing hand. She told me her name is Anna. She was very angry and scared and she wasn’t going anywhere. She told me she was 5-years-old.

A lot happened when I was 5-years-old: I met Jesus, my grammy (great-grandmother and favorite person) died, I started first grade, and my mother became pregnant with my youngest sibling. There is probably more but that is the big stuff and those are just the main details; each of those events having their own events to go with them.

I don’t think that Anna is only 5. I think she ranges in age from 5 through teenage years. I think this because of what she seems to do. I have spent a lot of time trying to get rid of her, trying to understand her and now trying to learn to live with her because she wont leave, she wont grow up and she wont give up her job. Anna’s job is to hold my emotions and my most painful and scary memories from growing up.

Unlike Veda, which I named, hoping I could control and seem to see leave more quickly. Veda is mainly depression and she doesn’t live here. She visits. Anna lives here and she waits quietly until she is reminded of a situation that is too similar to ones she has lived through before. She screams and cries in my head when she is upset, which is very distracting. She invites Veda. She also brings nightmares since she lives in my subconscious.

Often I am able to parent Anna, reminding her that we are here now. That we are safe, I can create boundaries and that the people that have hurt us or misunderstood us are no longer in our life, are not here, and they wont be able to hurt us anymore. She usually calms down in a few days but the time she is active is very blue for me.

This is the hard part of the year for me and Anna is more active and I had a family member reach out to me. They were kind and hopeful. I asked them to pray for me. They are hopeful for a relationship. I did not promise anything because I can’t. But Anna is terrified of them and 3 other people they are connected to either directly or indirectly. It has been an emotionally painful few days which leads to more physical pain…

I always try to find something positive in my situations so I decided to look up the meanings of the names that came to me for these parts of myself. Veda means wisdom in Sanskrit and is popular among followers of Hinduism. Anna is widely used among many countries but is found in the Latin meaning grace. I don’t feel as though I purposely chose these names because I remember when they came to me and it was very impromptu. But what I find fascinating is that wisdom and grace are the things I am always asking God for.

Depression often comes when we have been trying to carry something on our own, so it would make sense that I would need to rest and realign where my strength is found and this takes wisdom. Although Anna makes my life frustrating she does cause me to ask God for more grace because it isn’t her fault that she was emotionally neglected and abused.

When I think of relationship with family members I really don’t know what that looks like. For years I tried to engage but I am very different. I am very sensitive in every way: lights, sounds, foods, emotions, manners. I don’t care for current pop culture, and really never have. I hate gossip and prefer to hear about people from themselves and never from anyone else. I don’t care for TV. Because of all these other things I don’t do small talk well. I like to dive into deep conversations and debates. I am not a surface person. Groups are stressful to me because I like to give my attention to 1-3 people exclusively. Because I was often left to myself growing up and I love children because they have no agenda other than to be loved and heard, I find myself getting in trouble with parents because I listen to their children and then tell them things they missed.

I have been told I am hard to please but actually I am super easy. I don’t care about fancy things and money is useful but I don’t care about it either. I like time and conversation. I like people showing up or returning my cards and letters or calls. I love authenticity and honesty. I have been criticized and left behind (rejected) so much by all of them that I don’t see any reason to try to add them into my life. I am not going to stop being fat any time soon, or opinionated and Anna is not going to change, she has made this abundantly clear. So even though all the children have grown up, the advice I gave is still being held against me, according to the last conversation I put myself through. Right now I am parenting Anna. She needs to know that I hear her. She needs to know that I have her back and we will proceed with caution in whatever direction we go in.

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Book Review: The Good Neighbor The Life and Work of Fred Rogers by Maxwell King

by Summer D Clemenson | Dec 2, 2022 | Book & Product Reviews, Opinions

When I was growing up one of the very few shows my mother allowed me to watch was Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood and I watched it every chance I got, even through high school. Mr. Roger’s slow speech and gentle way of explaining things was a welcome change of the world around me that seemed to go too fast. It is refreshing to know that Mr. Rogers was naturally like himself but that he also took the time to train himself to speak to children at their level. I know he was a kindred spirit to myself and many, as we can learn, in great detail in The Good Neighbor The Life and Work of Fred Rogers by Maxwell King.

“When I was a boy I used to think that strong meant having big muscles, great physical power, but the longer I live, the more I realize that real strength has much more to do with what is not seen. Real strength has to do with helping others.” Fred Rogers

Fred McFeely Rogers was born on March 20, 1928 at his maternal grandparent’s home. He was raised in Latrobe, Pennsylvania. His mother’s delivery was very difficult and her doctor advised Roger’s parents against another pregnancy. Roger’s parents took this advice and when he was 11-years-old, his parents adopted his sister, Nancy Elaine Rogers (Crozier), who they called Laney.

Roger’s family had a hand in building much of the wealth in their community. Whey they were not working, they were volunteering, helping with fundraisers and writing checks or sending food baskets to families that needed help. Although they were well-off they were not pretentious.

Rogers had a very sheltered life from his over-protective mother, which only encouraged his naturally withdrawn nature. His family was devoted to faith, hard work and philanthropy and these thing were important to Rogers as well. Although he had trouble fitting in with his peers. He enjoyed reading, listening to music, puppetry, artistry and practicing his love for the piano. Even as a child he would perform puppet shows for his friends and he would pay close attention to see what they enjoyed most.

Faith, independence and music had helped Rogers develop his creative and artistic personality.

Rogers was so excited about television as it came to fruition. He saw it as an amazing medium for education. He saw it as a great way to engage children in a positive way. That is what he hoped it would be, until it became a tool for selling.

In 1953 Rogers got an opportunity to be on the ground floor of educational television on public television back in his home town. So he and his wife moved to Pittsburgh. Although he enjoyed his work at NBC, his only way up now was to become an executive and he knew he wanted to remain creative.

While working on the public television show, The Children’s Corner, Rogers remained devoted to becoming a minister. In 1955 he began studying, part-time at seminary while he continued to work.

Rogers and his wife welcomed their first son, Jim in 1959, Their second son, John was born in 1961.

Rogers earned his Master of Divinity, Magna Cum Laude, after 8 years of study in 1963. During the time he was studying for seminary, Rogers was also studying child development under the tutelage of Dr. Margaret McFarland at the Arsenal Family and Children’s Center in preparation to combine Roger’s love for children and ministry to create Mister Roger’s Neighborhood.

“You rarely have time for everything you want in this life, so you need to make choices. And hopefully your choices can come from a deep sense of who you are are.” Fred Rogers, Chapter 15

Rogers went to Canada and with the help of Fred Rainsberry, a well-connected television executive, that believed, as Rogers, that children should not be sold to, they created Misterogers. The show was 15 minutes long and showed daily from 1963 to 1967 nationally. Many of our favorite things about Mister Roger’s Neighborhood were part of MIsterogers.

When it was time to create Mister Roger’s Neighborhood, Rogers based it on his hometown, which he loved. Joseph Horne of Joseph Horne Department Store was the first advertiser. Rogers stood strong with his belief that children should not be sold to. The department store was listed at the beginning and the end of each 15 minute show as the sponsor. The store saw a noticeable growth. When the contract of 13 episodes was over, Rogers had to find more funding. With the help of many friends, including crowds of parents and children, sponsors were found, including Sears Roebuck Foundation.

1968 was the first year for Mister Rogers Neighborhood and Rogers knew exactly what he wanted. He knew children learned best in a blend of reality and make believe and that is what he gave them. He encouraged his musicians to play musically complex songs, as they would for adults. Other musicians knew his show was the “hippest” music of the day.

Rogers was always fighting for quality children’s television. In 1969 he spoke before the Senate Sub-Committee on Communications to share his belief in the importance of Public Television and his words kept the funding in place. The recorded works of his speech were used again in 2017 when the funds for Public Television were on the chopping block again.

“Please think of the children first. If you even have anything to do with their entertainment, their food, their toys, their custody, their daycare, their health, their education — please listen to the children, learn about them, learn from them.” Fred Rogers, Chapter 16

In an interview between King and Roger’s oldest son we can learn: “Whatever his personal foibles, Jim Rogers observes, his father had only one real touchstone: ‘Being who you are was so important to him that the only thing that would really upset him was phoniness. As long as I was being genuine, honest, he respected that.’ He adds: ‘I think all Dad really ever wanted for John or me was to be happy and pleased with who we are.’” Chapter 9

Mister Roger’s Neighborhood won 4 Emmys. Roger’s won a Lifetime Achievement Award in 1997.

I was almost overwhelmed with the amount of information available in this book but I learned a lot about Mr. Rogers from The Good Neighbor The Life and Work of Fred Rogers by Maxwell King. I am glad I read it. I had many memories of watching his show that brought back good feelings for me. Mr. Rogers truly made an impact on my life and he still does. I highly recommend this book.

I got this book from the Longview Public Library you can get your own copy of The Good Neighbor The Life and Work of Fred Rogers by Maxwell King on Amazon.

Read My Review on GoodReads:

The Good Neighbor: The Life and Work of Fred Rogers by Maxwell King
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

This book was not a light read. I learned more than I expected about Mister Rogers and even myself. He is still one of my favorite icons and probably always will be, for good reason. He was exactly who you saw. He was authentic always and loved always. His life’s work was to reach children, to teach them to understand their feelings and express them in safe ways and to always be curious. He was not a simple man but in the world he created in Mister Roger’s Neighborhood any problem that could be talked about could be managed and that made it more simple.

View all my reviews

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Sometimes Trust Can’t be Fixed

by Summer D Clemenson | Dec 1, 2022 | About Summer, Life, Opinions

I told my therapist, yesterday, that I am sure I have forgiven several people in my life completely. The part I am struggling with is that you can forgive someone, let’s call them “Person A,” so many times and then it becomes apparent that they are not a safe person for you to be around because they keep hurting you so you are forced to create a boundary that says Person A can’t be in my life. The really hard part is that because of the dynamics of a particular group of people, you now have to remove yourself from the group of people because the relationship between Person A and you and everyone in the group doesn’t let you just remove one person.

I would love to try to have a relationship with Person B and Person C but they are too close to Person A and Person B is married to Person D and I don’t feel safe around them either. There are more variables but that is too many letters and we will both get confused. It is just easier to stay away but it does make me sad; sometimes it makes me angry.

People say: Oh well, it is the holidays! or Oh well, it is family, get over it!

My therapist said that trust is a hard thing to fix. I told her that I realized that I don’t trust women because the closest ones to me were manipulative towards me. She asked me how that manifests in my life. I said I have 2 close friends and I am married to one of them.

We agreed that it must take a lot for me to allow someone to really get close to me.

Am I writing this so I can whine and complain? No. I am writing this to encourage anyone that has been hurt that it is ok to look at your wounds and realize truths so you can work on them. I am talking to God and my therapist about my concerns. I am creating healthy boundaries for my mental health. I am continuing to affirm my value and maintain my self-care.

Some relationships can’t be fixed, but the relationship with myself can be.

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Book Review: Act Like You Got Some Sense: And Other Things My Daughters Taught Me by Jamie Foxx

by Summer D Clemenson | Nov 30, 2022 | Book & Product Reviews, Opinions

The first thing I think of when I think about Jamie Foxx is “ego”. That isn’t a bad thing. My wife, Karen G Clemenson, and I have pretty big egos but we are women and we live in Longview, Washington so we have learned to be creative with how we show them. Foxx, being a Black man, a stand-up comedian, musician, actor and general entertainer, he gets to swing his around a bit and it wasn’t a surprise to see it in his book, Act Like You Got Some Sense: And Other Things My Daughters Taught Me.

I wasn’t shocked at how intelligent Foxx is either, I think you must be very smart to do stand-up and improv but I really enjoyed his writing too. I had a hard time putting his book down which did surprise me. I appreciated the stories Foxx told about his grandparents, who raised him and how he felt about his parents that were around but not available to him and how this made him very aware of what he didn’t want to do as a parent with his two daughters.

He was honest about mistakes he made as he learned how to be a parent and how he improved. Communication and connection are very important to Foxx and that was something that tried hard to work on with his parents even after he was an adult, as well as with his girls. Forgiveness and boundaries are also important lessons he has taught his girls.

One thing that Foxx made me consider that surprised me, is that each state is its own place. As Foxx described the vast differences between his home state of Texas and where he lives now, in California, Foxx had great pride in his home state, while he enjoys where he is now. I don’t know why I had never thought about that before but it took 46 years for me to come to this place to consider that each of our 50 states has its own laws, customs and expectations. With a Presidential election coming, it makes me realize that the President of The United States has a the job of getting 50 states with different laws, expectations and customs to go in the general same direction. Wow! That doesn’t count all the other stuff they do. I know it isn’t related…but Jamie Foxx brought me to this thought process. I amazed too!

Although I don’t prefer all of Foxx’s language, I really enjoyed this book, and he explains that he is not going to censor himself, so I know I am getting his authentic self, which I do appreciate. What I loved the most about this book is that I could feel how much love his grandparents had for him and how much love he has for his girls and his family. I highly recommend this book.

I got this book from the Longview Public Library you can get your own copy of Act Like You Got Some Sense: And Other Things My Daughters Taught Me by Jamie Foxx on Amazon.

Read My Review on GoodReads

Act Like You Got Some Sense: And Other Things My Daughters Taught Me by Jamie Foxx
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Jamie Foxx never fails to surprise me. His writing is engaging. I hardly wanted to put this book down.

View all my reviews

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Book Review: The Gospel of Wellness by Rina Raphael

by Summer D Clemenson | Nov 23, 2022 | Book & Product Reviews, Fuel Your Wellness, Opinions

I first saw this book on the bed at my sister’s house and was interested. Jamie never gives any clues away, so I was totally shocked that The Gospel of Wellness by Rina Raphael was not what I was expecting. I learned a lot, yet I am not sure I was the target market for this book. (more…)

What Was His Name?

by Summer D Clemenson | Nov 22, 2022 | About Summer, Life, Opinions, Prayers, Queer Community

I have been reading through Genesis lately and there is a ton of history in there but there are a lot of lists of names too. They are tedious. I usually read out loud and Karen, my wife, will be listening and every once in a while she will say: what was his name?

My answer is always, that was the best I can do. I have not been to seminary and I haven’t spent hours with people that are scholars that know how to pronounce the names in the bible so I do the best I can guess and I move on. I do the same with the names of the towns and the rivers and mountains.

Now this is the genealogy of the sons of Noah: Shem, Ham and Japheth. And sons were born to them after the flood.
The sons of Japheth were Gomer, Magog, Madai, Javan, Tubal, Meshech, and Tiras.
The sons of Gomer were Ashleenaz, Rophath and Togarmah.
The sons of Javan were Elishah, Tarshish, Kittim and Dodanim…

Genesis 10:1-4

I couldn’t sleep for a while last night and I was up thinking. I was considering some of the lists I had read the last few days. God does not tell every story about every person listed in the bible. He inspired the writers of the bible to a few choice people. But He did inspire the writers to put seeming endless lists of names in the Word. These lists don’t give hints to how to say these names. They don’t give anything away about the character of these people, their favorite things, if they walked with God or if they asked God questions.

But the beauty of God is that He knows everything about these people. Whether our names are in the bible or not, He knows our name. He knows where we came from. When we met Him. What our favorite things are. He knows if we tend to be happy all the time or can be a bit maudlin. He is not intimated by my endless questions…

I couldn’t help but be overjoyed while I lay in the dark that I was friends with a God that was so personal that He knew the most intimate things about everyone and it didn’t overwhelm Him because He is Spirit and He is like a cloud of infinite memory, love and relationship abilities.

I have a friend that has been really hurt in their life by everyone that said they loved them. It has taken years of therapy to help them come to a place where they feel they are healing. There is a lot of pain, anger and many other feelings and memories to heal from. They often post things about Christians that are hypocrites. Their posts make me sad. So sad.

I know my friend knows Jesus and Jesus is helping them. I know that God accepts them and all the judgements that have been made about my friend are wrong, ignorant, unloving and, as they say, hypocritical.

When I married, Karen G Clemenson, I was in denial. I couldn’t be queer. My mind was telling me that I couldn’t be gay. That was an abomination. I just married my best friend. We loved each other. But a year into my marriage, after seeing a therapist who helped me start to accept my truth, and talking to God, I realized, I was queer and I hadn’t lost God. He hadn’t stopped loving me, talking to me, or left me for one second. When I asked Him if He wanted me to divorce my wife, He said, “No.”

Yet when I considered membership to a church, I met with the pastor who told me that he did not agree with the law, but he did appreciate that read the bible. I was welcome to come to their church but I wouldn’t be allowed to be in a leadership position.. There were sincere people that cared about us, but there were other people that were scared of us and I just didn’t feel brave enough to handle their emotions on top of my chronic illnesses. In the end I left because I felt like the pastor was always planning his next missions trip and I had already grown up with a missing dad and it just felt too similar…

Why am I talking about this? Because we can’t know why people do what they do, but God does.He knows all our names. He knows everything about us. He even knows the people that might seem to be hypocrites or evil.

“I say to you that likewise there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine just persons who need no repentance.”

Luke 15:7

Yesterday I vented a little about Donald Trump. I hope that I didn’t offend too many people. I still feel the way I do about him but I do want him to find peace. I would hope that you could find a moment to pray for someone that makes you feel un-peaceful that they would find salvation and healing so that they would find peace and joy. I would love for heaven to have great joy because many came to repentance.

It feels better to pray for the people that makes us afraid than to hold onto the fear or hate. We were made to love. God is love and we were made in His image so it just makes sense that love is part of our DNA.

If you haven’t talked to God in a while, today is as good a day as any. He hasn’t forgotten your name.

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

It Is Time to be Brave

by Summer D Clemenson | Nov 21, 2022 | Education, Life, Opinions, Queer Community, Thanksgiving

On Saturday night Queer people met at the one LGBTQ nightclub in Colorado Springs, Colorado, a very conservative community, where they felt they could be themselves, Club Q. They were dancing, laughing and having a great time when Anderson Lee Aldrich walked in with a long rifle and two firearms and opened fire, killing 5 people and injuring 25 others. He was overtaken by two people who attacked him and stopped the shooting. At this time, Aldrich will face multiple murder and hate crime charges yet he has no bond and the docket does not reflect whether Aldrich has retained an attorney at this time. It is time to be brave.

In 2019, Colorado passed a red flag law that allows family members, roommates or law enforcement to petition a judge to temporarily remove a person’s firearms if they are a risk. In June of 2021, Aldrich was arrested for a bomb threat situation, yet he was allowed to keep his firearms.

We must mourn this loss of life and trust and then be brave. Be angry but not sin. This is just one of many terrible things that humans have done to each other but we must not let this let the darkness become who we are because we were made to be the light of the world. We were supposed to unlearn fear and choose love and be love to a world that is confused.

My wife, Karen G Clemenson, asked me the other night, after I had told her what I had learned about the actual first Thanksgiving, which is not at all what we were taught in grade school, does that make me feel good? What did I plan to do with that knowledge? I told her the same thing. I plan to mourn the fact that I was lied to. I plan to mourn the loss of life of innocent people. I plan to become a person with a greater ability to empathize with others. That doesn’t mean that I wont celebrate Thanksgiving in a way that honors my belief in being thankful to God for the blessings He pours over us every day, the people that we have to love, the roof over our heads, medical care, books to read, the ability to think, clothes to wear and food to eat.

Does it make me sad that these beautiful people were attacked on the eve of Trans Day of Remembrance? It makes me feel a lot of things. Sadness is just one emotion. I feel angry, disgusted and exhausted. People should be able to live their lives in peace.

It also seems to make me connect with the fact that Donald Trump threw his hat in the ring for President in the next election, last Tuesday. I believe that everyone has the right to believe what they believe, but that also means that I have a right to believe what I believe. I believe that Trump is a power hungry man that doesn’t care about anyone but himself. I believe he is an emotional neglect survivor that is abusive and spews the violence that he knows and encourages the same.

“A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heard, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.”

Luke 6:45

I think Trump encourages White Supremacists and people that hate to come out of hiding. I am not against Republicans. I am against hateful people.

Hateful people are everywhere, whether they are attacking queer people or Native Americans, Black people or other people groups. We must be brave and mourn what must be mourned and then look at what can be learned and love even more. It is not always easy. Society tends to push us towards hatred and it may seem that by being against hateful people that I am saying I hate them but that is not the case. I pray for people that hurt me. I may separate myself from them if I feel I can’t be loving towards them but I try to refrain from negative speech and I try to be honest without being violent in my words.

It is ok to be sad and mourn but we also must be brave and love with all our hearts. Be well my friend. I am thankful for you.

Colorado Springs LGBTQ club shooting suspect faces murder and hate crime charges, court records show by Elizabeth Wolfe, Holly Yan and Amanda Watts for CNN on November 21, 2022

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

It Is Time to Increase My Mood Stabilizers

by Summer D Clemenson | Nov 17, 2022 | About Summer, Chronic Illness, Life, Opinions, Wellness

I met with my psychiatrist last Friday and spoke with him about my concerns with things that were happening inside my head that were causing me stress. October through February were the hard months for my custodial parent, so I have a hard time in these months too. Plus the holidays are here and they had their own bag of not so fun goodies. We had kept me at the lowest dose I could stand because the Luvox was giving me headaches but that we before we found proof, via MRI, that I have had migraines for most of my life and began treating them. It is time to increase my mood stabilizers.

I don’t act on what happens in my head. I am in control of myself. Even my psychiatrist felt that that the screaming and crying I hear in my head is a part of myself that remembers the pain and not me wanting to hurt myself or anyone. I do have visions of inappropriate behavior but that is usually when I am angry. I try very hard to not get angry to a certain point. In the past I have blacked out and hurt people. I don’t ever want that to happen again. So when the visions start, which are a precursor to the black outs, I walk out of the room and calm down. Along with myself, I promised myself I would never hurt anyone on purpose a long time ago. Violence is not OK, ever.

As the holidays come closer I have more and more dreams about family members of the past. I think about moments and I feel old feelings. I don’t mean to. I don’t want to. I realized today that I don’t trust women because of the type of situations I was raised in. I don’t have much to say about men either. Most of the time the men in my life were working or doing their own thing, until they were needed. They just weren’t around much.

I was raised by a parent with Borderline Personality Disorder. I found the paperwork one day, by accident. I was looking for pictures for a photo album in their desk. BPD is a terrible mental illness to live with. From what I can remember, my parent put all their energy into working and they did that well. But when they came home, understandably they were exhausted and any self-control they had was spent. That self-hatred that comes with mental illness was there. I often didn’t know what parent would come home. I seemed to have several, of different ages. I don’t have a lot of memories because I have blocked most of them out, but I have lots of fears. That kind of fear doesn’t let you trust. I know my parent loves me and has always wanted the best for me, I also know that while I was growing up there were no reliable treatments for this mental illness. They gave me the best they had, and I know they were the best option available to me, but I still suffered.

My step-mother had her own issues. I am not going to go into a lot of details but she never earned my trust, but pushed it away. I know she had her own trauma experiences growing up. I am not a trained therapist or psychologist but I would not be surprised if she didn’t have her own diagnosis. My father loves her and I respect that but that keeps me away, especially since my siblings are so much like both my mothers. Both women have good and bad qualities but I find myself to be very defensive around them; I am not sure they are able to see the healthy, more balanced version of Summer that I have matured into.

I am hoping the increased meds will help quiet things in my head. I am going to talk to God about these new things I have noticed about myself. I want to get better. For my sake and the sake of people who I have yet to meet. Its ok to need to get help. I am thankful that I have a team that works well with me.

Borderline personality disorder by Mayo Clinic Staff

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

I Have Lost My Taste For Slapstick

by Summer D Clemenson | Nov 14, 2022 | About Summer, Life, Opinions, Prayers

When I was growing up slapstick comedy was really popular and my mom really loved it. John Candy and Chevy Chase were two of her favorite actors. I have to admit they had great timing. But as I have gotten older and really got to know myself I have lost my taste for slapstick because someone always has to get hurt for someone else to get a laugh. I don’t think it is funny when people get hurt, especially as someone who has been hurt a lot.

We still see a hunger for slapstick in smaller forms today. We call them memes. But I don’t think all memes are funny either. Today I saw one with Ivanka Trump wearing a dress that was similar to one that Grace Kelly wore in a movie with a name that made it easy to tease Ivanka. You know what? It made me sad. Ivanka looked beautiful. According to the meme she was at her sister’s wedding and we should have been happy for them. I don’t want to befriend the Trump family and I certainly don’t want them to continue in politics but why shouldn’t I want them to celebrate a happy moment in their family?

The reasons I don’t want to have them on the news, in my living room, or in positions to make decisions that affect my life are because of the chaos they brought the last time they were in that position. Donald Trump invites negativity because that is what he knows. But if I take a moment in their lives that should be joyful and twist it in the manner that I have seen them do, I am no better than they are and I want to be a person that invites peace and forgiveness in my midst.

I do admit that I was not as emotionally healthy when Trump won his election as I am now. I was unable to say President Trump for the first 2 years of his term and I was hateful and spiteful, at every chance I had to speak or think of him. But somewhere in there I had to find a way to forgive and have peace, for my sake. I needed to stop having an anxiety attack every time I heard his name or heard his voice. It was hard. Sometimes it still is. But as I read Running on Empty and began thinking about how we didn’t even know about fostering emotionally healthy children until now and I was able to see how this would cause me to be an emotional neglect survivor, but this would also make most people an emotional neglect survivor and I began seeing how I needed to forgive a lot of people, even Donald Trump.

This does not change my political views but this reminds me to not let my political views change who I am every day.

Jesus took a few minutes to share a parable when He was with us, I am sure a few of you have heard before: The Sower and the Seed:

“And some fell among thorns, and the thorns sprang up with it and choked it…Now the ones that fell among the thorns are those who, when they have heard, go out and are choked with cares, riches and pleasures of life and bring no fruit to maturity. But the ones that fell on the good ground are those who having heard the word with a noble and good heart, keep it and bear fruit with patience.”

Luke 8:7…14-15

Jesus is the Sower and the Seed is the Word of God and the garden is our hearts. Not all of our hearts are ready to accept the Word of the Lord, when we first hear it, or even ever, but when we are ready to choose Jesus, we can let the cares of the world get out of the way so that His teachings can become deep in us so that love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23) are easily found in us and become boiling out of us.

This is the beauty of the freedom of choice that God gives us. We don’t ever have to choose Him, but when we do, we find ourselves letting go of pain, judgement and anger more easily and picking up forgiveness. This doesn’t mean we don’t still need to create healthy boundaries in relationships for our mental, physical and spiritual health. We still need boundaries because we can’t make others make the same choices we have made or in the same time table as we have made them in.

My wife, Karen G Clemenson, and I were watching Christmas Vacation the other night and I was shocked at my mind’s response to the movie. I had put myself in the movie. Instead of enjoying a movie, I have watched hundreds of times, I was seeing myself as part of the family. I saw myself opening the front door as soon as the squirrel was seen in the tree, knowing the squirrel would prefer being outside. I never spoke. I saw myself moving from room to room making sure there was a path in every room so people could walk safely and then I saw myself coming back with a garbage bag to pick up what couldn’t be salvaged. After that I was just plan cleaning. I was just putting things back in their place because someone had to. I was not oblivious to the chaos but I was not part of it. I was not thanked, I was not spoken to. I was just there.

I am not saying I ever lived through a Christmas that was exactly like the one in this movie, but emotionally, I think we could top it, between all the households. I think this is why I don’t like slapstick. When you are invisible it is like being at the brunt of slapstick humor. If it is the day you are visible and you are the scapegoat, you definitely know some pain.

I have been reading a biography about Mr. Rogers and I am finding out that I have much in common with him. This shouldn’t surprise me. Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood was one of my favorite shows, even through high school. When he was a boy and people around him told him to not think too much about things that bothered him, he just couldn’t. He couldn’t stop caring. He cared too much. I appreciate this. I am a person that cares too much too, and I think about how children are affected by what the grown ups around them are doing. I love that I have this in common with Mr. Rogers. He also didn’t like slapstick…

Another thing I have in common with Mr. Rogers is my love for Jesus. I want to leave you with this scripture that is so powerful!

I will love You, O Lord, my strength. The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer, my God, my strength, in whom I will trust; my shield and my horn of my salvation, my stronghold.

Psalm 18:1-2

Be blessed!

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Book Review: Koshersoul: The Faith and Food Journey of an African American Jew by Michael W. Twitty

by Summer D Clemenson | Nov 9, 2022 | Book & Product Reviews, Food, Life, Opinions, Queer Community

…So I was digging through this bag of books my sister gave me and I found this book with colorful pictures and food on the cover and was excited to read it, thinking I would learn a lot about food but was surprised when I learned so much more. Koshersoul: The Faith and Food Journey of an African American Jew by Michael W. Twitty is a book about just that, a journey, but not just by Twitty, but the other people he has met along the way.

Being Jewish is not just a religion, it is a culture. It is a generally led through the mother so gender is important. Most people have been led to believe that Jews are white/caucasian or Middle Eastern but there are Jews all over the world and many are Black and they have been left out of the conversation much of the time. If you’re a Black Jew, as in most situations, you are a color before you are anything else, as dictated by society’s standard.

“Your place in the mishpocheh, the family, and how you navigate that place, not just with others but within yourself — that is the bootcamp of identity, especially intersectional identity, and it’s where you find your special truth that only you can bring to the table.” Chapter 3

Mishpocheh (mesh-poh-keh) is Yiddish for kinfolk or people that are from where you are from. Yiddish is a transition language between German and the Jewish person’s original language just as Ebonics wasn’t bad English, originally, but a transition between native tongues and English. Twitty doesn’t go into detail about Ebonics beyond this but the fact that people still use Ebonics, does cause my wife’s skin to crawl because it is reminder of being enslaved that should be let go while we celebrate liberation.

One reason I love to read is that it stretches my brain. I really look forward to reading some more about Jewish culture, and then re-reading this book. Twitty uses a lot of Jewish terms without explaining them and although I did find a glossary at the end of the book, and I did Google several terms while I was reading, I think I will better appreciate this book after reading some more on the culture. He did try to explain the words that make up the main tile for the book:

“Kosher” is a standard of ritual fitness according to Jewish dietary laws and sometimes to other parts of Jewish material culture and ritual observance because G-d says so and because it connects other Jews.

“Soul” has its own connotations of soul food, soul music, soul people, soul dancing. However, soul food, has come to mean both African American vernacular cuisine and the comfort food core traditions of other folk cuisines. Soul means a certain vibe and feeling, an earthiness and peace with yourself and your people. Soul food is based on the ingredients: corn, tomatoes, peppers, pineapples and peanuts which were ready available to enslaved people.

About the People

“Loving yourself means you remember you are betzelem Elokim — made in G-d’s image — as much as any other person. It means that G-d has love for you as an LGBTQ person and that your struggles and strengths matter to our Creator. In the LGBTQ community, we have conflicts between one another as men and women, cis and trans, white — identified and people of color, disabled and not, wealthy and financially challenged. Your duty is to apply the best of Jewish values — mainly a concern for the stranger and those in need, and the urge to support the oppressed — because we were all of those in the time of our enslavement and captivity, and we are duty bound to be compassionate and loving and empathetic. Be grateful and thankful for your difference in the world and for the opportunity to feel for others what you feel for others.” Chapter 11; Mayseh; The Letter I Always Wanted to Write

The relationship between people and food helps bring groups together which is why “Jewish” food is a vast word.

Jewish people have been judged and ridiculed everywhere they have been — it is sad to know why it is easy to see why they have failed to reach out to marginalized Black folks — Jews or otherwise. To reach out to Black people would bring them into the position of abuse. White Supremacy has brought division and fear here too.

“We are here to be family to one another, to exist for the sake of others, even as others exist for our sake.” Chapter 1

I have been interested in learning about Jewish culture for some time and I am thankful that I read this book. I believe it has reminded me to learn more about this culture. As a Jesus follower, I see it as learning another part of my Savior, but also I believe we are all connected and learning about other cultures helps me to see me in the world better. There are some wonderful recipes, interesting cultural references and great personal stories throughout this book which make it a fascinating read. I highly recommend it, although it can get a little dry here and there, it is easy to overlook.

I got this book from my sister, Jamie Holloway, you can get your copy of Koshersoul: The Faith and Food Journey of an African American Jew by Michael W. Twitty on Amazon.com.

Read My Review on GoodReads:

Koshersoul: The Faith and Food Journey of an African American Jew by Michael W. Twitty
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I was not expecting what I got when I picked up this book but I enjoyed what I got. Twitty is a well-read person with lots of words and I did have to look several up, which I kind of enjoyed. I plan to read this book again, after I have read a few more books on Jewish culture, and have a better understanding of some of the basics. I enjoyed the many contributors and viewpoints Twitty shared and his personal point of view, it really helped me see outside of myself. I also look forward to exploring some of the recipes.

View all my reviews

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Book Review: Yoga Pant Nation by Laurie Gelman

by Summer D Clemenson | Nov 7, 2022 | Book & Product Reviews, Life, Opinions

I had been reading some really heavy books before I picked up Yoga Pant Nation by Laurie Gelman, so I was looking forward to something light and hopefully funny when I chose this one out of the bag of books I had got from my sister. At first I was little let down by the commonality of the home life of Jennifer Dixon, the main character, who spends a lot of her time raising her 5th grade son, Max and watching her 2-year-old granddaughter, Maude a few days a week.

As a lot of busy moms do, she lives in her yoga pants; even I as I write this, I am wearing yoga pants and my baby has four legs and says meow. In her defense, Jen and her husband, Ron, actually own a string of yoga studios but even he, would like to see Jen try harder than her “dressy” yoga pants every once and a while.

Throughout the book, Jennifer takes on leading a spin class, helps her aging parents through some growing pains, leads the grade school’s fundraising group through the most successful year ever and supports one daughter through a career change and another through a custody battle where every ends up with a smile on their face, especially granddaughter, Maude.

I almost put this book down. It was so common, but Gelman did a great job developing the characters and making them real to me. I had to find out how everything turned out. In the end, it was a pleasure to read.

I would like to thank my sister, Jamie Holloway for loaning this book to me. You check this book out at the Longview Public Library or you can buy your own copy of Yoga Pant Nation by Laurie Gelman on Amazon.

Read my Review on GoodReads:

Yoga Pant Nation by Laurie Gelman
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Easy read. Kind of boring but a nice change from the books I had read previously, however toward the end the family had pulled me in and I was cheering them on.

View all my reviews

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Wellness Hurts Sometimes

by Summer D Clemenson | Nov 4, 2022 | About Summer, Chronic Illness, Life, Opinions, Prayers

I have come to believe, from my own experience, and not from any research, that there are many ways to harmony and balance and wellness hurts sometimes. There are more than one type of wellness and these include: physical, mental, and spiritual wellness and all require a certain amount of boundaries, affirmations and expectations of ourselves to protect the one thing we can control; ourself. If we don’t care for ourself then how will we care for others. Jesus told us to give out of abundance not out of want; He told us to rest and find joy in His peace. Those sound like the recipe for boundaries to me…

This week has been hard. Actually it started last week with PTSD flash backs. I didn’t even want to write because I was afraid of what would come out of me. I don’t like to relive things and I don’t like to feed the negativity either. Some of my stories might be told someday but they should be told by a Summer that is in control of herself and not by a Summer that is in torment. I was thankful when I finally had a funny memory, a few days ago about one of my abusers; I knew I was coming out of it. Not all of my life was stressful and terrible. There were good days too.

When one of my siblings was born there was a commercial for Budweiser Beer that had a frog that said,” Bud bud, bud, bud bud, bud, bud bud, Budweiser!” As the older sibling, I noticed that they enjoyed this sound and I often would say the bud part without Budweiser to them to make them laugh. No matter how old they were, or usually what mood they were in, I could get them to laugh if I did this. Even as an adult. When they became a parent, I tried it on their child. I don’t remember if their child cared…although their cousins love it! But I do remember my sibling sitting behind them with a smile on their face, trying not to laugh.

It made me laugh to think about it. I was glad to have that memory after a week of terrible memories that felt brand new. No matter how often I would try to remind myself that I was here now. I was 46 years old and not 9 or 12 or 16 years old. I would pet Xavier who wasn’t born yet and think about that fact. I would remind myself that those people are not in my life anymore because I chose to stay away from them. I would remind myself that I had Karen and she loved me like I always wanted to be loved. It is such a struggle when it feels brand new, but you know it isn’t.

I have a friend that has been going through this too. I was trying to comfort them on Facebook and in their angst they thought I was criticizing them. I had to remind them that I was trying to be supportive. They don’t have a Karen. Part of my strength is that I have a partner that can remind me that I am here now and not there anymore. The hardest part is when she is at work. My friend doesn’t have a partner.

I did contact my therapist last week. She was glad to set up 2 appointments a month for me. She knows between October to February are my hard times. We couldn’t do a second session in October but I have two appointments set up for November. I had hoped I was far enough along in my healing that I could stay at one session a month but real strength is knowing that I need help and asking for it.

This week is a Fibromyalgia flare from hell. I am not surprised. Fibro is connected to trauma and emotions. Fibro is caused by an prolonged psychological stress and genetics, I have both of these factors. After a week of being stressed to the max, I am not surprised that my normal dull roar is now an screaming banshee at times and walking or lifting my arms above my head is an exercise in emotional strength and a shower is a time to cry and pray and when it is over a time to cry and praise God that I made it through. Sleeping is torn between hot flashes, nightmares or stressful dreams where I am in terrible pain and waking in terrible pain. But I will gladly take this over PTSD flashbacks…

I told this to my friend when I was checking in with them on Messenger. I am glad they were ok when I reached out to them.

We all have our triggers. Campaign season is hard on my friend, understandably…Mine are the holidays. I am wondering if I should put a disclaimer out there that I have a weird sense of humor about holidays because until the last few years, I had never had a holiday without fighting involved. I hate fighting.

Karen and I were watching a rerun of Reba, last night and they were fighting over who’s house they would have Thanksgiving at and who would cook. As a child of divorced parents, I thought the answer was easy…have two Thanksgivings. I tell you what, if you are invited to a Thanksgiving at my house and a fight breaks out, I will pack up dinner quicker than a fork can hit the floor and we will reschedule for another day. Holidays are supposed to be peaceful and they don’t have to have anything to do with a day on a calendar, in my mind.

I have been thinking about making a sign to hang near the door that says: If you can’t keep the peace in this home, take a walk, take a nap or take a hike…and I totally mean it.

I have learned that wellness hurts sometimes. There are side effects from important medications and even from a stay in the hospital. My dear sister, Jamie Holloway, is suffering with some terrible wounds caused by water retention she had from her last stay in the hospital. She is exhausted and begging for a break. I wish I could do more than pray and congratulate her for being diligent in advocating for herself. Sometimes healthy boundaries for one person, hurts another person but must stay, for the first person’s mental health. There are times you might have to lose out on a promotion at work because you need to say no to the early morning meetings, so you can have some needed quiet time so you are balanced.

I encourage you to look at your life and see where you can create healthy boundaries and balance in your life even if it is painful at first. When you get used to it, it might be the best thing you did for yourself.

Fibromyalgia by Mayo Clinic Staff

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

God, Meds and Self-Care

by Summer D Clemenson | Oct 26, 2022 | About Summer, Chronic Illness, Life, Opinions

There are three things I have to be attune to every day to be balanced: God, meds and self-care. Beyond these three things, my activities can vary within a given day, but I have to give a nod to these three things to remain in my best self. I think if I didn’t have mental and physical chronic illness these things might not be so profound but since I do, they are paramount.

I have a friend that lives with a lot with similar issues. They have been having a lot of struggles the last few years because they have different issues than I do and it is hard to find solutions and parameters that we can live with sometimes. They came to visit my wife, Karen G Clemenson, at work the other day. They let her know that they had dropped out of school. They needed more time to focus on their passion. They were so afraid I would be disappointed in them. I am not.

Today is a hard day for me. I pushed myself very hard yesterday AND the weather has changed, bringing more pain. I am anxious about blood clots. I am a little more anxious about a lot of things but that too is cyclical for me. I slept in. I did do my workout; it took a lot longer than usual and included tears in my eyes for most of it. I have taken my meds so far, until my night time meds are due. I have done my bible study and talked to God several times. I have put on my compression sock, done all my toiletries, got dressed, eaten appropriately, fed the cat and I am writing — I even went through the ads on Safeway’s and Fred Meyer’s websites…and worked on my budget for November…I have to make sure to remember to buy my mother-in-law some socks and Karen is out of ketchup…

Sometimes getting dressed means putting my nightgown back on but today I put clothes on. Sometimes writing is just the journaling I do while I do my bible study or notes I take while reading a book. Sometimes I don’t touch a book and I just lie in bed and talk to God. I understand having to change plans. If school is not part of the big picture for you and you feel like it is stealing time from your dream, don’t go. It doesn’t make sense to waste your time, money and energy on something that is not for you. What works for some people, might not be what will work for you.

What is important is that you find what does work for you. What are the three things you need every day to be balanced? Maybe it isn’t God, meds and self-care…maybe you don’t need medications…maybe you don’t believe in God…I hope you believe in some form of self-care…I also hope you do believe in a higher power but that is a different blog.

What are your three things?

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Are You a TERF?

by Summer D Clemenson | Oct 24, 2022 | Education, Opinions, Queer Community

Recently I had the pleasure of having a conversation with a new friend on Messenger that helped me grow a new wrinkle on my brain, the one place I want as many wrinkles as possible. Her name isn’t really Susan, but I wasn’t sure she wanted me to share her real name so I gave her a name that people, for some reason, often mistake my name for:

Susan: Are You are TERF?

Me: I don’t understand. What do you mean?

Susan: There is a certain comedian that had gone out of their way to include transphobic material in their comedy routines. A TERF is a Trans Exclusionary Radical Feminist.

Me: “Well, I didn’t know they did that. And I am not judgmental towards anybody in the family. I just agreed with the statement, in this scenario. They are also an atheist and I don’t agree with them on that level either. I don’t think I will ever meet them so there is no chance we will be friends, but if we do meet, I will ask them why they pick on such beautiful people just for money. It only makes them look small. Do I need to take the post down?”

Susan: “It would make me more comfortable if you did. This post resonates with me on the terms of some of the transphobic things they have said.’

Me: “Thank you for telling me about your feelings and this term.”

Susan: “I’m glad we could have some amount of dialogue over it and move forward.”

Me: “I am too. The post is gone.”

Trans Exclusionary Radical Feminism is a form of transphobia or specifically trans-misogyny that targets trans women and trans-feminine people.

There does seem to be a group of lesbians and radical feminists that believe that including trans-females “erases” them or makes them less relevant,. There are events in Europe where trans-females have been excluded which have caused angst with groups that support both lesbians and trans-females.

In the purest form of feminism, all genders have equal rights and opportunities and there is respect for diversity, experiences, identities, knowledge, strength and striving for women, and everyone to realize their full rights.

Some feminists do not see transgender females as women; they feel as though since this group of people were assigned male at birth, they are privy to male privilege and can’t fully appreciate the subordinate social position of women in society. These women believe that by choosing to live as a female, transgender females are exercising another form of male entitlement. This reason has allowed them to exclude trans women from womanhood and women-only spaces, creating a sex-based oppression.

These radical feminists are losing footing in the United States as annual events are seeing artists boycott events that exclude transgender women. One trans woman that was excluded from Michfest in 2014 said, “it’s not really wanting to invade space. It’s a deep-seated wanting to belong.” But she added, “if you’re identifying with women, shouldn’t you be empathizing with women?” What is a Women; The New Yorker

Why is is wrong to look at only biological gender as a marker for gender? Because there are many differences that make the female experience different. Race, sexuality and social status make a difference in the experiences of womanhood, let alone the binary construct that gender dwells on. Trans females and trans-feminine people face very serious oppression and suffer with high rates of violence, homelessness, poverty, sexual assault and healthcare discrimination. Women’s spaces and resources need to be available to them, including shelters, survivor support, health care, and bathrooms all need to be made available to every person; trans-men may need pregnancy and related services as well. By alienating trans-females, cis women that are more masculine have been targeted because people have assumed they are trans.

I am really glad that Susan reached out to me and not just because we got to share really cute pictures of our cats after we were done talking about TERFs but because she helped me learn about a topic I wouldn’t have learned about otherwise. When I referred to “the family” I was talking to all queer folks whether they are an L-G-B-T-Q-I or A, we need to stick together and support each other not just because we suffer persecution sometimes but because we are fellow humans. As humans we can all relate to each other, knowing that we all suffer, we all want to grow and we all seek joy.

I wish you well.

How to Spot TERF Ideology by The University of Cambridge Women’s Campaign
‘Pro-lesbian’ or ‘trans-exclusionary’? Old animosities boil into public view by Julie Compton for NBC News January 14, 2019
Price Waterhouse v. Hopkins at Thirty by Sasha Buchert — Senior Attorney, Lambda Legal for Alliance for Justice May 1, 2019
What is a Woman? The dispute between radical feminism and transgenderism by Michelle Goldberg for The New Yorker American Chronicles July 28, 2014
What is Feminism? by International Women’s Development Agency Staff
You many have heard about TERFs Winter 2019 Newsletter by Gender Justice Staff

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Book Review: Crazy Joy Finding Wild Happiness in a World That’s Upside Down by Mary Katherine Backstrom

by Summer D Clemenson | Oct 20, 2022 | Book & Product Reviews, Opinions

On my last visit to see my sister, Jamie Holloway, she handed me a bag full of books to read. I accepted the challenge, knowing I would pass on these books to new readers when I was done. What a fun contest. One of the books in the bag was bright colored and promised to be fun. Crazy Joy, Finding Wild Happiness in a World That’s Upside Down by Mary Katherine Backstrom sounded exciting.

Right away Backstrom lets her readers know she has been diagnosed with bipolar 2, OCD, PTSD and ADHD so we know she has had some struggles but she herself is probably rather colorful. She says: Some days are blue but other days are manic but she likes how those feel; yes they are destructive but she feels like sunshine.

“Happiness is a moving target. It’s an emotion dependent on so many variables; it comes and goes with the wind. What made your heart smile yesterday isn’t what your heart longs for today.” Introduction

I enjoyed the introduction and then I couldn’t really follow Backstrom. I don’t know if there is such a huge difference in our ages, where we were raised or what, but try as I might I couldn’t follow her but I did love the questions she asked at the end of the chapters and that is where I got the most from the book.

My answers to questions from the chapters:

Chapter 1

I believe happiness is defined by how your pursue it until you decide what you want to be happy. I want a partner that supports and loves me no matter what. I want to have an idea of what I should do to cope with my chronic illnesses. I want to want to have dreams and the security to start planning for them. I have this. Besides this I have a solid relationship with God who provides all we need in His wisdom and perfect timing. I don’t think happiness is always what we think we want but it is the satisfaction that we are safe and we can build on a firm foundation.
Joy comes in moments where we allow forgiveness to heal resentments. Happiness and Joy are related. Happiness is a state of mind and Joy is like a new plateau as we grow toward love.

Chapter 2

If I could go back to my child-self what would I say? I would say: “I love you.” I would hug myself and say, “I believe in you. I love your smart brain and big heart and it is ok that no one understands you because God does. You are important. You are original and you will have to be very brave and ask yourself what you want. Take a walk every day because you enjoy it. You will never make anyone happy so make yourself happy and meet your responsibilities. Keep listening to that voice in your head.” Most of this I would say in my head because my younger self wouldn’t be able to process this but I would hold her hand and love her with all my heart.

Chapter 3

I think cemeteries are beautiful and peaceful. I have enjoyed exploring them and wondering about the people buried there.
I want my dash to grow every day. I am not afraid to die and I am not generally sad when people die because I believe our souls are eternal and our mortal bodies hold us back — so I just want to feed my soul as much as I can while I am on earth and try to encourage others as well.
I think we we take our love with us and God tells us to rejoice a lot so we must take our joy with us when we die, although I have never contemplated it until now. This makes me appreciate God even more because He is so good.

Chapter 4

I was taught I had to have a beautiful home and things to be happy; money in the bank and trips planned. But you know what? I don’t. Those things might be nice, when I ready for them, but I trust God and He obviously thinks I am not there yet, so my world is small, but my bills are paid and I have what I need and enough to share and I am happy.

Chapter 5

When my self-talk gets negative, I correct myself and forgive myself and then I say something positive like: I am getting better at staying in the now, or I feel stronger when I do my workout daily.
God tells me He chose me and He is with me always. My wife tells me I am beautiful and important. I tell myself I am intelligent and able — I think I am hearing good things. It used to be hard for me to accept praise because it used to come with a backhanded judgement, but I am healing from that. Now I am trying to just be grateful.

“Love shouldn’t hurt. Peace is found in the kind of community that’s both safe and mutually supportive.” Chapter 7

Thank you to my sister, Jamie, for loaning me her copy of this book although what I got out of it was unconventional, maybe you will connect with her better than I could. You can buy your own copy of Crazy Joy Finding Wild Happiness in a World That’s Upside Down by Mary Katherine Backstrom on Amazon.

Read My Review on GoodReads:

Crazy Joy: Finding Wild Happiness in a World That’s Upside Down by Mary Katherine Backstrom
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Backstrom writes in a friendly fashion but I couldn’t relate very well. I did enjoy her questions at the end of each chapter, that is where I found the most growth for myself.

View all my reviews

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

I Don’t Accept

by Summer D Clemenson | Oct 19, 2022 | About Summer, Community, Life, Opinions, Prayers

Years ago I was trying to be part of a group of people, learning to use their prophetic gifts. I was very uncomfortable because I didn’t feel like I fit in but I wanted to learn from them so I kept going. As they took turns prophesying over each other, I wondered why no one spoke over me and I heard God tell me that He would be the only one that He would allow to speak over me. As someone trying to be part of a group this was a buzzkill but as a believer, this was a really cool word…that I didn’t feel I could share with anyone in the group and not hurt their feelings…

True to His word, no one has tried to speak over me and when I have volunteered myself for prayer, I have paid the price by bringing other people’s junk home to fight with until I figured out what to give to God so I would be free. Not fun.

I generally, take this in stride. I don’t read a lot of opinions of man. I stick to my bible. The Word is alive to me and I can read the same verse over and over again and get something new each time. My talks with God are informal. He made me. I don’t have to be fancy.

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.

Joshua 1:9

Yesterday a person sent me an article to read. I was surprised because I haven’t had a face to face talk with this person since The Red Rooster was open in Downtown Longview, WA…I really loved their baked peach fritters! If anyone knows where I can find baked peach fritters I would love to know!

I read the article. it was ok. The premise was good but there was a manipulative spirit on it. I stayed with the positive and thanked them for the article and asked them why they sent it to me since we rarely interact. I was surprised by their answer but took it quietly. They told me that I was overly critical of myself and I should read the free book on the site so that I could better understand my identity in Christ.

I know my identity in Christ very well. I assured them it was my identity on this earth I was having trouble with and then I went to talk to God. I also thought about their words a lot. I appreciate them thinking of me, they obviously thought this book was very good and might be of help to me, like it was to them. I asked God to bless them. I felt criticized by their words and I wondered if maybe they were too critical of their own self, so I asked God that if that were true, that He would free them. I even asked that if there was any truth to their words towards me that He heal me but that was just covering my bases.

I couldn’t get it out of my head so I decided to send them another message:

I have learned to not get defensive right away when people tell me observations they have of me. I am wondering why you think I am overly critical of myself? We haven’t had a face to face conversation in years.

They answered that they could tell by the content of my posts.

To which I replied:

I have thought about your comment a lot and I don’t accept it. I used to be very critical of myself because that is all I knew. I grew up being criticized always and was around people that criticized me, themselves and others all the time. I am not around them anymore and I have worked hard to overcome those habits.

What you are reading is me being honest with myself. I used to not know myself. Now I do. Self-acceptance is very important to me because I never had the chance to do that before. I am a brutally honest person but those statements are not criticisms they are just statements of being, right now.

I know I am right where God wants me to be. He has worked so many miracles in my life and I have learned so much I don’t take any of it for granted. Is it a struggle sometimes? Yes, but struggle is where growth happens and I want to be growing and He knows that. So my truth is my thank You to Him because I am here to acknowledge that I am here now and wherever I am tomorrow it will be because He knows I am ready for the next step.

I don’t believe this person was trying to hurt me in any way. But I am thankful for this moment to look at their statement about where they think I am and say I don’t accept. This is important because so many times in my life, people who were well meaning, spoke negative things over me and I wasn’t able to say, “No,” and now I am.

Oh, bless our God, you peoples! And make the voice of His praise to be heard, who keeps our soul among the living, and does not allow our feet to be moved. For You, O God, have tested us; You have refined us as silver is refined. You brought us into the net; You laid afflicted on our backs. You have caused men to ride over our heads; We went through the fire and through water; but You brought us out to rich fulfillment.

Psalm 66:8-12

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

What Are Gap People?

by Summer D Clemenson | Oct 17, 2022 | Community, Education, Life, Opinions

I told someone today I was a Gap Person. I wasn’t talking about someone that shops at The Gap; I don’t do that.

“Believe it or not, homelessness is incredibly expensive to a community. The most cost-effective way for the community to respond to homelessness is to prevent it in the first place.” Cowlitz 5 Year Homeless Housing Plan Updated 11.25.19.pdf

When I read this statement I get a little defensive because my family has been in the system for a long time. In fact, for the last 8 years we have never had a lease in our name. We have either lived with friends or in hotels or motels, while we worked with organizations that were excited to help us until they got to know us.

What have we learned? I can’t live with other people successfully. I can’t live in the Highlands. I can’t live with bugs and yelling voices, fighting and police cars showing up regularly. I have also learned that there a lot of people that work very hard and make enough money to pay the rent but nothing else.

Those people that are an expense to the community that the Cowlitz 5 Year Homeless Housing Plan refers to are the people who live on the street and/or make waves. They get arrested. They make trouble. They make messes. Not because they are bad people, necessarily, they just need help and are very loud about it. When I am properly medicated and I feel relatively safe, I don’t make much noise at all. In order to get help I have to go to a shelter. That is what VIP wants us to do.

I have to give up my Emotional Support Animal to do that. Xavier is not allowed there. My 15-year-old kitty would have to be re-homed. I am not going to do that.

Living with other people eventually leads me to negative thoughts; suspicious thoughts and then the rest of my mind goes to bad places. I might even end up on the Behavioral Health floor at the hospital. Who needs or wants that?

The goal of the 5 Year Plan is to house more veterans, disabled and mentally ill…Hello! My wife is a veteran (with 3 jobs) and I am disabled and mentally ill…we are also a black and queer family if you want to hit a few more stats.

Do you know that since we can never save any money that we can’t ever think of moving out of this nice hotel? I can’t have a kitchen. I can’t grow anything in dirt. We have to drive to find a pretty place to take a walk and forget going out of town for fun. We work hard to keep our minds positive but sometimes it is really hard. We are both really tired.

You probably know other Gap People. We are not the only ones. The definition of homelessness is pretty open. We have friends that live in their cars too. You wont know unless you know what to look for, or they trust you enough to ask you to charge their back up battery or maybe come over for a shower.

Those people living on Alabama are not the only ones that need help. I am praying for all of us. Even the ones who are living in nice houses with more than enough resources because we all need to be kinder to each other.

I thank God every day because I know that I am very blessed. I have a roof over my head and a family that grounds me and loves me. I know that there are many people that don’t have that. I have never been hungry or naked or without a shower for longer than I wanted to be. Even the wars in my mind, I know aren’t real most of the time.

I pray you can respect every person you meet today. You don’t really know what they are battling. Gap people are really good at hiding that they are trapped. And for people that are not in the gap but having a really bad moment, give them some space. They don’t want to hurt you. They may not even know you are you.

We all need to be saved sometimes.

Cowlitz 5 Year Homeless Housing Plan Updated 11.25.19.pdf created December 2, 2019 by Danielle Rylander and updated by Emily Strange for the Washington State Department of Commerce

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Whether or Not I Have an Abortion is None of Your Business

by Summer D Clemenson | Oct 15, 2022 | Life, Opinions, Prayers

My heart is heavy today. I try to avoid the TV and succeed during the day when my wife, Karen G Clemenson, is at work but at night she likes to watch her shows. Being campaign season, every commercial break bombards viewers with ads about abortion on both sides. I am so tired. Whether or not I have an abortion is none of your business.

I know this is a loaded sentiment, especially because I am a Jesus follower but it is true. The choices I make in my life are mine and the only one I have to answer to is Jesus. I don’t have the right to judge anyone and I don’t have to share my choices with anyone.

According to an article in The Washington Post, Senator Lindsey Graham, representative of South Carolina, has introduced a bill that would ban abortions, nationwide, after 15 weeks of pregnancy.

“I think we should have a law at the federal level that would say, after 15 weeks, no abortion on demand except in cases of rape, incest or to save the life of the mother,” Graham said at a news conference.

When asked if his bill had exceptions for cases where there were fetal abnormalities that were found later in the pregnancy or if the child was stillborn, Graham did not know. I don’t understand this. If this is his bill, shouldn’t he know what is in it?

I think the decisions we make in life are getting more important. I don’t want to invoke anger. But I do want to make people think.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding.

Proverbs 3:5

I am very upset because all parties have wasted so much money advertising about abortion — what good it would have been done if that money had been invested in public schools, foster care, health care or housing, where living children may need help. It seems so petty to judge and control people’s actions while children suffer needlessly in one of the wealthiest countries in the world. It makes me feel so angry and sad. How do I bless God with these emotions? How do I not judge people when I feel this way?

I do trust God. There are lots of confusing things in this world but I am glad that God’s wisdom is above all and He always helps me find His peace as I need it.

He has delivered us from the power of darkness and conveyed us into the kingdom of the Son of His love, in whom we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins.

Colossians 1:13-14

Jesus’ redemption and forgiveness of sins is never-ending and His grace is beyond our comprehension. If the murderer that was on the cross beside him on the day He was crucified was worthy of the same forgiveness as I am, so is anyone in a moment of desperation. Jesus will not return until all His children have been collected, He is that patient and his mercy is that everlasting. I don’t have to judge anyone.

My job is to seek out truth and love and that is what I am doing. I don’t have to lean on my own understanding because I can lean on my faith in the Son of God who loved me and died for me so that I could share in His new life. I know His grace covers every baby that has died and He welcomes them home.

For of Him and through Him and to Him are all things, to whom be glory forever. Amen

Romans 11:36

Graham introduces bill to ban abortion nationwide after 15 weeks by Amy B Wang and Caroline Kitchener for The Washington Post on September 13, 2022

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

Book Review: I Will Not Fear My Story of a Lifetime of Building Faith Under Fire by Melba Pattillo Beals

by Summer D Clemenson | Oct 14, 2022 | Book & Product Reviews, Opinions

I recently had the opportunity to read I Will Not Fear My Story of a Lifetime of Building Faith Under Fire by Melba Pattillo Beals and I was so touched by her story. Every moment, it seemed, of this woman’s life was a tribute to faith and strength and it spoke to my soul.

“God loves you. He knows how beautiful you are. Don’t crinkle that pretty little face. God doesn’t know the word nigger and He will be disappointed if you give in to it.” Her grandmother, India Peyton, to Beals, Introduction

Melba Pattillo Beals was born on December 7, 1941, on Pearl Harbor Day at Missouri Pacific Hospital. It was a whites only hospital but since her father worked there and her grandmother promised that Bishop Riley, a black pastor that had a lot of respect in the town, would be appreciative if an acceptation was made in their case, since it was obvious that the baby was too large for her mother to deliver without help, they were allowed to stay in a storage room. They had to enter using the back door. No birth certificate would be administered with the hospital’s name on it. There would be no visitors allowed and only the mother, father and grandmother were allowed in the hospital.

Beals required forceps to be born which caused an infection that required surgery. The doctor ordered her head to be rinsed with Epson salts every 2 hours but the white nurses refused to care for the infant. As the baby’s temperature reached 105 degrees, the janitor heard their prayers and told them the orders he had overheard the doctor give the nurses. Beals’ grandmother went to the store to purchase Epson salts and took care of the baby herself and she was able to go home in 3 days.

15 years later in September of 1957, Beals was chosen as one of the Little Rock Nine. She was One of 9 students chosen by the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People (NAACP) to integrate Central High School in Little Rock, Arkansas. This decision was not supported by the local people. It had been made by the United States Supreme Court, who stated that separate was not equal and all schools must integrate.

Angry, rock-throwing mobs surrounded the school. The Ku Klux Klan rode every night and more frequently in the neighborhood Beals lived in. The local newspaper listed the student’s addresses and phone numbers which brought obscene phone calls and random bullets flying through windows.

On the first day of school the National Guard had been called in by the governor to keep the black students from entering the school. Beals saw her friend, Elizabeth, escape the angry mob to the safety of Mrs. Grace Lorch and Benjamin Fine from the New York Times. Beals and her mother were not so lucky. As the crowd threatened to rape and lynch them, Beals remembered her grandmother telling her that God was as close as her skin and so she prayed to God and they were able to reach their car and get away as the mob threw rocks and punched their car.

The governor called back the National Guard and began using State Troopers to keep the black children out of the school even though the NAACP told the students to stay home while they filed an injunction to prohibit the governor from blocking their entry.

Monday September 23, 1957 the 9 students were led into the school by local police. There were given class assignments where none of them had any classes together. Not any white student or faculty wanted them there and it showed. By 11:30 am the black students had to be evacuated and taken home because the police could not control the violent mob outside. In response President Eisenhower sent the 101st Airborne Division of the US Army — The Screaming Eagles, the heroes of the Korean War — to guard that black students and keep the peace.

Wednesday September 25, 1957, 9 children were escorted by armed 101st Division Soldiers, helicopters flew overhead and troopers galloped back and forth across 2 blocks in front of the high school. Each student had 2 soldiers each. This didn’t stop all the abuse but Beal’s hopes rose that she would get a good education.

Lessons Beals Learned Through Her High School Experience:

The President sending troops to protect black students was a miracle.
It’s God’s plan that prevails — not our’s.
You can’t change other people, only yourself.
Integrating the school was not about the 9 students but about the generations to come.
There is not time for worry — you must be aware and alert about now so you can cope with day to day attacks.
Segregation took away opportunities but mostly self-esteem.
Always be grateful.
Always forgive.

During the summer of 1958 Governor Foubus had a private white school built and closed all public schools. Since they weren’t using tax dollars there was nothing the government could do. The 5 remaining students from the original Little Rock Nine that hadn’t been expelled, had to wait to see what the NAACP told them to do.

Beal’s grandmother also died around this time and it was a great trial for her to go through. Although she spent the morning studying she used the rest of the day doing what her grandmother had used to do to keep the house going for her family.

In 1959 the NAACP sent Beals to Santa Rosa, CA to finish her senior year. The KKK had put posters up offering cash rewards for the death of the 9 students and it was not longer safe for them to stay in Little Rock. No one told Beals that the NAACP was run by white people in Santa Rosa or the family she would be staying with was also white before she got there. This was a huge adjustment for her, but eventually she learned that these people were not going to hurt her and she built loving relationships with them. This was truly a life-changing experience for her. The McCabe family taught Beals that white didn’t mean freedom. Freedom was a mindset that we can all enjoy.

As Beals started college, at 19-years-old, she met and married Jay, a white man. He did not care about skin color and he helped her heal from the pain in the past. But he also wanted her at home. He wanted a traditional wife that was happy to stay at home, cooking, cleaning, and being a mommy. But Beals wanted an education and a career and married life was not working. Their marriage ended but it produced a beautiful daughter and Beals left with positive and loving thoughts of Jay.

Beals was offered a scholarship at Columbia University in New York. Her daughter went to stay with her mother in Little Rock. Afterward she went back to California to fill a position as a news reporter at KQED. Later she moved to KRON TV and soon realized she was facing a quiet form of racism. She prayed to God for guidance and then stood up for herself and let her bosses know if this behavior remained she would have to gain the support of the NAACP. She knew she was given a big responsibility and didn’t want to fail.

“…it is important that I follow God’s words to treat others as equals; seeing equal is an essential quest for being seen as equals.” Chapter 12

By following her heart and God’s lead, Beals was able to push beyond the fluffy stories female reporters were usually restricted to in the 1970’s. She covered several serious crimes and impressed her male colleagues and helped women see they could have the future they wanted. She also moved on to self-employment doing public relations and authoring books.

On Tuesday November 9, 1999 the Little Rock Nine received the Congressional Gold Medal.

Throughout Beals’ life she overcame adversity by praying to God and following her heart. She kept her mind strong and never lost faith. This book is not just one inspirational story but several over one woman’s lifetime. Beals is a good writer and her words compel you to continue turning the pages.

Thank you to my sister, Jamie Holloway, for loaning me the copy of the book I read. You can get your own copy of I Will Not Fear My Story of a Lifetime of Building Faith Under Fire by Melba Pattillo Beals on Amazon.com

Read my Review on Goodreads:

I Will Not Fear: My Story of a Lifetime of Building Faith Under Fire by Melba Pattillo Beals
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I found this book to be very inspiring. Beals writes in a way that is easy to absorb while imagining her ordeals vividly. She is a strong woman with a powerful voice.

View all my reviews

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven.

If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this:

Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world.

I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me.

I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.

« Older Entries

Next Entries »

Subscribe to Email Updates

Please wait...

Want to be notified when a new article is published? Enter your email address and name below to be the first to know.

Feel free to leave your comments below!

Read My Review on GoodReads:

Feel free to leave your comments below!

Read My Review on GoodReads:

Feel free to leave your comments below!

Feel free to leave your comments below!

Read My Review on GoodReads:

Feel free to leave your comments below!

Feel free to leave your comments below!

Read My Review on GoodReads

Feel free to leave your comments below!

Feel free to leave your comments below!

Read More:

Feel free to leave your comments below!

Read More:

Feel free to leave your comments below!

Feel free to leave your comments below!

About the People

Read My Review on GoodReads:

Feel free to leave your comments below!

Read my Review on GoodReads:

Feel free to leave your comments below!

Read more:

Feel free to leave your comments below!

What are your three things?

Feel free to leave your comments below!

Read More:

Feel free to leave your comments below!

My answers to questions from the chapters:

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Read My Review on GoodReads:

Feel free to leave your comments below!

Feel free to leave your comments below!

Read More:

Feel free to leave your comments below!

Read more:

Feel free to leave your comments below!

Lessons Beals Learned Through Her High School Experience:

Read my Review on Goodreads:

Feel free to leave your comments below!

Categories

Subscribe to Email Updates

Subscribe to my Latest Posts