The search light searches
for life and truth
And sometimes there is just mystery
Because God cannot be completely understood
by my human mind
I know Him
In the quiet I have spoken my honest heart
and sought new ways to see and hear and speak
~
He is the search light
and the truth
But both take time to absorb
and adapt as He and I remove
what doesn’t serve to make room for what does
As my humanity sometimes fails me
or becomes more humble
A book is still only a book in men’s hands
and relationship has breath
~
Mankind has built an alter of evil Babylon was never really demolished
only demonized
The tower was flattened and men’s language confused
but God still knew what men would do
were doing
are doing
God knows where all the children are
He made women with the best part of Himself
~
If you don’t seek Him
You won’t find Him
If you don’t know Him
He won’t know you
What a loneliness that distinction is
And you wonder why you have no joy
We have come to a fork in the road
Decisions must be made
~
Veils have been torn down Lust pride
and greed
has grown too great
Someone is shinning the search lights
in places so well hidden
right in front of our faces
~
Thriller may be more of warning
than a song to dance to
with friends
Where will you stand
when there is no place to rest
if you never learned to endure
Because love has always been an action word
not something to collect
~
Hell is not a place to go to
It is right here
when you choose not to love God is love God is light
Without love there is no light
So in the dark
we all burn and the hounds of hades
are hungry for those who enjoy the masquerade
~
But me and my house
we enjoy the light
We don’t wear masks
Holy, Holy, Holy
Is the Lord God Almighty
The One able to search me
and know me
Alpha and Omega
You are the breath in me
I must stand in the light
and be the reflection
Of the love I know full well
Many think they know His love
But if you are following the lead of men
they will fail
because they must
so you will know you need a Savior
~
It isn’t His name that will save you
but His love
It is different than what can be
bought with money or influence
It is given freely under the apple trees
or in places where money doesn’t matter
~
Holy, Holy, Holy
is the Lord God Almighty
He has always been here
and always will be
And They don’t care what you call Them
But that you do
They are ravished
by one glance of your eye
~
The men in power can not save you
but your Teacher can help you
Through whatever war is created
whatever mistake you make
and They will love you all the way
Because you were breathed into existence
by the same Creator of the mountains
and the trees
~
Naked under the apple trees
we are all the same
Bodies come in many colors
but our souls either reached out to Them
or they did not
My writing has become fervent lately and pointedly political lately. More than ever it has had a point in mind and not just to be art or education. I pray every day that I hear God; that He be blessed by me and that I bless you. The target is not to be divisive against a political party but systems that are not healthy; that have never allowed for true equality or peace. Shalom doesn’t just mean quiet. Shalom, the word, Jesus would have used for peace is much greater than the word we throw around so easily.
People have accused me of hating our president; maybe they are confused by my post Dear President Trump. At one time that was sort of true, for a time. But as I looked inside myself, because I had to understand what was happening every time I heard his name and I lost control of my body, in an anxiety attack. I eventually realized I was afraid of him. There were layers that I had to look at. And as I dealt with myself and my scars from emotional abuse and neglect in my past, I was healing and on the day Trump was shot, I saw something in that video clip that brought clarity to my fear. He looked like my abusers. His defiance, even in a moment of terror; I knew that look. On that day, I was no longer afraid of him because I knew I was just like him, if I wanted to be. And I don’t.
Over the last 25 years or so, I have blatantly chosen to become softer, calmer, a better listener, more inclusive than I was taught to be. It has been difficult but Karen G Clemenson and Jamie Holloway are good coaches and Jesus is the best teacher.
When I thought I hated President Trump, it really bothered me. Just about as much as when I realized I hated another person in my life. I don’t want to hate anyone. If God lives in me, there can be no room for hate inside me. Why would I ask Him to live with that? But I am lucky because God desires to live in a relationship with me, in Spirit and truth, so I can and have been brutally honest with Him and while I did that He has helped me to set down a lot of painful things. He will do that every time I ask Him to. I do not hate President Trump. I do not like President Trump, but I do respect the fact that he too, is made in the image of God and God made Trump and God loves Trump and He will find glory for Himself in what Trump is doing, because that is what God does.
I have been considering the fact that people think that I hate Trump and then I saw a video of one of my favorite spiritual leaders, Reverend Joseph Yoo. Today he was reflecting on peacemakers.
“Shalom means wholeness, things being restored the way they were supposed to be. Justice where there was exploitation. Healing where there was harm. Provision where there was lack. Belonging where there was exclusion. Shalom is when human lives actually flourish. Because you can have no war and still have injustice everywhere.” Rev. Joseph Yoo
I was watching another person speak today, where they stated that they felt that Trump had been elected by people because people saw themselves in him. People that were offended by facts, accountability, and equality for all people liked Trump. People who thought that cruelty was strength and compassion was weakness and lying, cheating, and bullying people were something to brag about, they believed in this man.
I don’t know if I agree with this video completely, but it something to consider; to chew on. I read a lot of people’s comments on Facebook. I read more comments than I ever comment on, mainly because I am shocked at what people are willing to say to each other. It makes me wonder, if TJ Talks is correct about at least a few of my fellow United States citizens. So while I pray for President Trump, I pray for the people that voted for him and the people that make those comments that shock me. I ask that God find glory for Himself in what He is doing in their lives too.
I have written a lot of Letters to my Representatives lately. I think it is a better use of my time than protesting. I don’t have a body that can handle the winter weather or standing for hours. But God gave me the gift to write. But I also feel compelled to honor the people that have been killed by ICE. I am almost done writing a poem for each person that has been killed this year by ICE. It isn’t because I hate ICE. I don’t. I don’t like that they wear masks, are inconsistent with warrants and don’t check IDs. They have used many policies during this administration, against United States citizens that we have never seen before. What I am doing is honoring the lives that are lost because I believe that Every Person is Important.
I have thought about people who argue that many people died while in detention centers under President Obama. I vaguely remember this. It was a long time ago, but at that time we were trying to get a business or two off the ground. Also I was starting to get sick and trying to not worry about it. I was also unaware of many issues I had lived with always. I do remember that we did not hear about ICE agents randomly asking for proof of citizenship from anyone they saw, they didn’t go door to door and people didn’t feel the need to protest the government like they do now. I remember being angry about neglect and abuses in detention centers but I didn’t know what to do about it. I am older now and more comfortable and able to speak my mind, which is why I write to my representatives and encourage others to do so as well, now.
I felt safer with President Obama. I don’t feel safe with President Trump. But it is not their breath in my lungs; It is God’s and I understand this better now, than I ever have. By looking honestly at what is happening and considering and praying and trying to listen and be inclusive and even mourning the loss of lives I want to restore balance. Because that is Shalom.
~
Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
I was doing my bible study today and it occurred to me while I was reading Deuteronomy 7:1-19 why countries where Judaism or Muslim is the primary or first religion and that religion shapes their culture, why religious freedom might be hard with the United States. On the flipside of that, our response to those countries from all the different glasses we wear in the United States, including a million denominations of Christianity and the many other religions we say we make room for, and even though I am truly ignorant and very naive, think I have a better understanding today.
In the Jewish Faith there are many sacred texts but the main book that they study is the Torah which is also found in the Christian Holy Bible. These books are called Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, and Deuteronomy.
The Qur’an is the primary text of Islam, revealed to the Prophet Muhammed beginning in the year 610 C.E. The Qur’an is required reading for anyone who wants to understand Islam. Qur’an means “The Recital” in Arabic; according to the story, the angel Gabriel commanded Muhammed to “Recite!”. Some Muslims do not believe that any text other than the actual Arabic text of the Quran (even a transliteration or an Arabic text with vowels) can strictly be called ‘the Qur’an’. This is because the Arabic text is considered canonical and there can be no other versions of it.
I met a Muslim woman, while I at the hospital once. I asked her about her beliefs and she said basically her beliefs were the same as Christianity, except she did not believe that Jesus was the Son of God. Now I know that isn’t entirely true, but there are some similarities.
Deuteronomy 7:1-19 New Revised Standard Version Updated Edition
“When the Lord your God brings you into the land that you are about to enter and occupy and he clears away many nations before you—the Hittites, the Girgashites, the Amorites, the Canaanites, the Perizzites, the Hivites, and the Jebusites, seven nations more numerous and mightier than you—2 and when the Lord your God gives them over to you and you defeat them, then you must utterly destroy them. Make no covenant with them and show them no mercy. 3 Do not intermarry with them, giving your daughters to their sons or taking their daughters for your sons, 4 for that would turn away your children from following me, to serve other gods. Then the anger of the Lord would be kindled against you, and he would destroy you quickly. 5 But this is how you must deal with them: break down their altars, smash their pillars, cut down their sacred poles,[a] and burn their idols with fire. 6 For you are a people holy to the Lord your God; the Lord your God has chosen you out of all the peoples on earth to be his people, his treasured possession.
7 “It was not because you were more numerous than any other people that the Lord set his heart on you and chose you, for you were the fewest of all peoples. 8 It was because the Lord loved you and kept the oath that he swore to your ancestors that the Lord has brought you out with a mighty hand and redeemed you from the house of slavery, from the hand of Pharaoh king of Egypt. 9 Know, therefore, that the Lord your God is God, the faithful God who maintains covenant loyalty with those who love him and keep his commandments, to a thousand generations, 10 and who repays in their own person those who reject him. He does not delay but repays in their own person those who reject him. 11 Therefore, observe diligently the commandment—the statutes and the ordinances—that I am commanding you today.
Blessings for Obedience
12 “If you heed these ordinances by diligently observing them, the Lord your God will maintain with you the covenant loyalty that he swore to your ancestors; 13 he will love you, bless you, and multiply you; he will bless the fruit of your womb and the fruit of your ground, your grain and your wine and your oil, the increase of your cattle and the issue of your flock, in the land that he swore to your ancestors to give you. 14 You shall be the most blessed of peoples, with neither sterility nor barrenness among you or your livestock. 15 The Lord will turn away from you every illness; all the dread diseases of Egypt that you experienced, he will not inflict on you, but he will lay them on all who hate you. 16 You shall devour all the peoples that the Lord your God is giving over to you, showing them no pity; you shall not serve their gods, for that would be a snare to you.
17 “If you say to yourself, ‘These nations are more numerous than I; how can I dispossess them?’ 18 do not be afraid of them. Just remember what the Lord your God did to Pharaoh and to all Egypt, 19 the great trials that your eyes saw, the signs and wonders, the mighty hand and the outstretched arm by which the Lord your God brought you out. The Lord your God will do the same to all the peoples of whom you are afraid.
So God says:
WHEN I bring you into 7 nations that are mightier than you, you WILL defeat them.
Make no agreement with them and show them no mercy.
Destroy all idols and high places.
Do not intermarry with them because that will cause you to become confused and turn away from Me and worship other gods.
If you worship other gods, I will have to destroy you.
I have chosen you and sustain you because I love you. If you are loyal to Me, I will keep My promise to you.
If you reject Me. I will reject you.
If you follow My laws, I will richly bless you.
If you doubt Me, I will make you like the countries I have already beaten for you.
I don’t take it lightly that Judaism, Muslim/Islam, Christianity are all Abrahamic religions because they are connected through one person. All three religions are monotheistic (they believe in only one God), they originate in the Middle East and they are all connected to Abraham, the first man to make a covenant with God, the father of Isaac and Ishmael. Isaac became Israel, the father of the Israelites, otherwise known as the Jews. Jews believe in God and Jewish prophets. They do not believe in Jesus or Muhammad.
Ishmael was Abraham’s other son. The son of the servant who was sent away, the father of the Muslim people. They believe in the prophet Muhammad who was inspired, divinely to write the teachings of the Muslim religion. They believe Jesus was a prophet, but not the Son of God. Islam sees Judaism and Christianism as earlier versions of their religion, and their religion as the final, complete and correct version of religion.
Christianity is an offshoot of Judaism. Many Christian Saints lived in the Middle East. Christians believe that Jesus is the Son of God that was foretold in the Old Testament or Torah. Christians believe that Jesus was born of a virgin birth, He was crucified on a cross and rose after 3 days ascended to heaven and left His Holy Spirit here to guide them, until He comes back. Christians do not follow Jewish laws and they do not accept Muhammad as a prophet. They follow a “love they neighbor as thyself,” type of teaching.
And then I read about the crucifixion. (I have done this before)
Mark 15:37-39
Then Jesus gave a loud cry and breathed His last. And the curtain of the temple was torn in two, from the top to bottom. Now when the centurion who stood facing Him saw that in this way He breathed His last, he said, “Truly this man was God’s Son!”
Matthew 27:50-54 said that there was an earthquake and dead saints came back to life and were seen by many.
Luke 23:44-47 said that there was an eclipse for 3 hours from noon to 3 pm and as the light failed, that was when the curtain in the temple was torn in two.
The Tabernacle and Temple were signs that God was with the Jewish people. This building was built on separation. There were many courts. The Outer Court was for Non-Jews, the ceremonial unclean, and women. The Inner Court was for men. The Holy of Holies, which was enclosed by a thick curtain, contained the Ark of the Covenant. This symbolized the manifest presence of God. Only the High Priest was allowed in there, after ritual cleansing, one time a year. (Hebrews 9:7) The tearing of the veil meant there was now no separation between God and man.
In the Old Testament, it was believed that people would die if they spoke directly or saw God. (Exodus 19, Exodus 30:20-33, Leviticus 10:1-2) But Jesus became the conduit between God and His people. (1 Timothy 2:5) He fulfilled all prophecies. (Genesis 3:15, Genesis 22:18, Genesis 49:10, Deuteronomy 18:15-18, Psalm 2:1-12, Psalm 16:8-11, Psalm 22, Psalm 78:1-2, Psalm 110, Psalm 118:22-24)
As a Jesus Follower (I prefer this term to Christian) I feel like this is the final revelation. The New Testament is full of what was taught by Jesus as the new covenant. We are to show love and compassion. Share what we have. Be honorable towards each other and hold each other up. I believe that Jesus died to free us from the law that is so important to the Jews but can’t save anyone. (Romans 7:4)
I also see that in the United States we have a lot of options that other countries do not have. We have a lot to have to try to shut out so we can try to focus on the teachings of Jesus and things that are good and pure and holy. There are a lot of temptations. There are a lot of freedoms that might even be seen as idols to worship. Even the idea of religion can be an idol if we aren’t careful. It is hard to stay humble on this earth, regardless of where we are. Even yesterday, I got angry and forgot to pray before I sent a message to someone, I should have never sent a message to. I have been praying ever since about how to attempt to rectify that. It is hard to be human on this earth. I can see why our judgement can get us in trouble and why others might think badly of us and even hate us, especially if we hate them. If I am having trouble with my religion, I can see how others might have trouble with there own and even mine.
Its a lot to think about and even more to pray about.
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
This week I got a note from a random messenger that saw one of my posts. I didn’t edit their message. This is what they said:
Hi you stated that you are a Christian but you are not christ like as you are gay and you are sinning. You are also have a problem with our president who is way better than the other which is a devil.
At first I was a little miffed. Who likes to be judged, especially by a stranger? I have never met this person. But as I began responding, I was also thinking…
How do you know? Have you done your own research with more than one book or are you relying on what other people have told you? How long have you walked with God? Does He talk to you? Has He verbally told you what you are saying is true? Our president is just a man, just like all the rest before him. He is not perfect. Have you read in the bible what a good leader is supposed to look like, because Trump is not that. (Exodus 18:21, John 13:13-17, 1 Timothy 3:1-7, Titus 1:7-14)
Also, when did I state that I am a Christian? I don’t use that word. I think that word has been morphed into something very sad. I am a Jesus Follower. It’s a very different thing. Jesus never said anything about sexuality but He said very specific things about adultery, selfishness, taking care of the poor, compassion… (Matthew 5:2-12, Matthew 5:27-28, Matthew 19:21, Matthew 23:25, John 15:13)
Another thing, who told you I am gay?
You might think I am angry with you but I’m not. I’m angry but not even at you. I’m angry at the system that taught us to judge each other and to think small. I used to think like you. I was raised in a conservative family and church. I was taught that homosexuality was an abomination. I didn’t know to ask questions. I never even met a queer person until I was 18 years old.
I had to meet several queer people to realize that each one was an individual with their own personality and dreams. I had to learn who I was to learn that it is not my job to tell other people how to live. Even the bible says, ‘judge not, lest ye be judged.’ (Matthew 7:1)
I know you are ignorant. The letters LGBTQIA+ all mean something special. I am old enough that I prefer the term queer, which is a blanket term for everyone. I’m not a Lesbian (women that only love women). I’m not Gay (men that only love men). I’m Bisexual (I have loved 2 men but I married my wife). I’m not Transgender. I’m Queer. I’m not Intersex (a person born with genetic markers or genitalia for both male and female sex). I am not technically A-sexual, however I am Demisexual which falls in that category. They added a + for any other groups people want to be in…
The far right republicans and conservative christians have spent years creating a platform to control people. Telling people that the media is fake and science is wrong and all kinds of propaganda. You probably can’t hear me, but I said it anyway. I don’t hate republicans. My wife is a republican. I don’t hate christians. Most of the people I know believe in some version of this faith. I myself, am a Jesus Follower.
But the word homosexual was not in the bible until February 11, 1946. You can research all of what I am saying. It is not hard to find. This translation was created to convince people to hate queer people who had quietly lived among us forever. There was no word for this kind of relationship in the bible because marriage was mainly a way to create children and provide inheritance; it was a business agreement. If you got lucky, you learned to love each other. People did not marry for love.
I did not realize I was queer until I was almost 40. But I have lived through a lot of trauma and have been in therapy for years. The reason I am bothering with you is that, I know people who knew they were queer all their life. They were abused terribly and have many scars. I don’t have scars about my sexuality. So I feel comfortable expressing things that someone of my queer community might not be able to communicate clearly.
I have read the bible through and through many times. I talk to God everyday. I have walked with Him for 45 years. I have read lots of books and watched documentaries. I don’t believe that loving my wife is a sin. I believe God created her for me. We have found so much healing with each other and so much peace and growth that no one else was ever able to create. God guides us and helps us together. Our marriage is just like any other marriage that relies on God to inspire.
I really don’t care if you don’t believe me, but I do want to impress on you that there are people who have hurts because people judged them merely on who they loved; not on their character or deeds or aspirations and it is not right. Jesus told us to love our neighbor as ourself and He did not differentiate. I hope to inspire you to share the same kind of love the He gave to you. (Mark 12:30-31)
Even with the woman that was caught in adultery, He did not judge her. When all the men were ready to stone her, He advised that the man that was free of sin should cast the first stone. After they all left, He sent her on her way. (John 8:1-11)
We are not here to judge each other. We are here to learn how to love each other and to learn how to be loved.
This person never responded to me. I find this confusing because they cared enough to accuse me but they didn’t care enough to say anything to what I had to say. I don’t believe I was rude or even mean. I was sharing information I have collected over the years while I was learning who I was and meeting great people. But I think I can understand because the conservative right doesn’t teach us to question or study. They want us to stay ignorant so we are easily led. I am afraid this person expected me to either ignore them or respond with verbal violence, but that is not where growth is. That is not who I am.
In the end we can only grow through education. My hope is that this person learned something.
~
Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
In my life I have walked with Jesus for almost 45 years. In the first half of my relationship with Him, I did not have as much control over where I learned about Him or what that meant, however, He saved me so many times. In much more conservative surroundings, my viewpoint on abortion was very set in stone. As I have learned more about humanity and a very compassionate Jesus, my views on laws have changed a lot. But today I woke and thought: Is Abortion Wrong?
I have always thought I knew what the bible said about abortion, however, today it occurred to me that I have not researched what the bible said with an open mind on this topic, or even in this decade, and probably not in the last 20 years. Today I did a search online about what the bible actually says about abortion and found several sites that were interesting and offered many scriptures and a couple viewpoints. I have shared a couple of the sites below if you are interested in reading them. I made sure to find more than one viewpoint.
~
There were plenty of scriptures:
We can know that God planned our lives before He created us and He created us in His image. We know that God always knows us and He is always with us.
~
Moses wrote in Genesis 1:26-27
Then God said,” Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.
For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother’s womb. I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, and that my soul knows very well. My frame was not hidden from You when I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed. And in Your book they all were written, the days fashioned for me, when as yet there were none of them.
~
The prophet Jeremiah wrote in Jeremiah 1:5
“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you; before you were born I sanctified you; I ordained you a prophet to the nations.”
~
Regarding violence Moses writes in Exodus 21:22-25
If men fight, and hurt a woman with child so that she gives birth prematurely, yet no harm follows, he shall surely be punished accordingly as the woman’s husband imposes on him; and he shall pay as the judges determine. But if any harm follows, then you shall give life for life, eye for eye, tooth for tooth, hand for hand, foot for foot, burn for burn, wound for wound, stripe for stripe.
~
But it should be known that the bible isn’t specific about who’s life they are replacing and in one article, it says the bible is not concerned with the life of the baby, but the mother.
~
Moses writes in both Exodus 20:13 and Deuteronomy 5:17 say: You shall not murder.
I have no argument with this scripture. It is pretty cut and dry, however is it murder to have an abortion? There is no clear scripture about this in the bible. We know that there were abortion procedures in the days of the bible times, not anything like what we have now, but it was known how to end a pregnancy. Genesis 9:6 says whoever sheds man’s blood, by man his blood will be shed, however, who’s blood are you shedding by committing an abortion? The mother’s or fetus?
~
It is important to stand up for those that can’t stand up for themselves. This could be unborn children, but there is no reason to believe that the bible is talking about this in the following scripture, but talking about civil rights for the people that are poor and not heard.
King Lemuel writes in Proverbs 31:8-9
Open your mouth for the speechless, in the case of all who are appointed to die. Open your mouth, judge righteously, and plead the cause of the poor and needy.
~
Paul writes in Galatians 6:1-5
Brethren, if a man is ever taken in any trespass, you who are spiritual restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness, considering yourself lest you also be tempted. Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. For if anyone thinks himself to be something when he is nothing, he deceives himself. But let each one examine his own work, then he will have rejoicing in himself alone, and not in another. For each one shall hear his own load.
So we know we are to carry each other. We are to love each other. We are to be mindful of our weaknesses so that we are not tempted to do wrong. But in the end, we are only responsible for our own life choices.
~
Differences Between Christians and Nonbelievers
Nonbelievers are not to be held to the same expectations as Jesus Followers. Why should they be? Why should we have the same laws?
I walked away from the bible and the computer. I needed a break. As I peeled a sweet potato for dinner, I suddenly knew I wasn’t alone. God asked me if my choice regarding my opinion on abortion was based in love or the law. When I am trying to persuade someone to my side, am I considering their circumstances, their health, their ability to live with what happened to cause the pregnancy, the chance of their survival, if they were to give birth or do I just want to be right? When I am interrogating a medical professional, am I being professional, or am I being hateful, or murderous even? Can I only hear myself or am I stuck on being right?
Is my being right more important than Christ’s law of love (see the words in red above), because if that is the case, than that is what Jesus had against the Pharisees. Jesus was not intimidated by sinners. He knew He would forgive them.
In Mark 5:24-34 the bible tells of a woman with a gynecological issue. She had seen many doctors and spent all her money and been suffering for years, only to get worse. The word tells us that by Jewish law, her touching Jesus would make him unclean. But she believed in her heart that if she only touched His garment, that she would be made well. Because Jesus was here to love, He commended her for her faith. She had been healed.
I still believe that abortion is very personal choice. I still think that we have no right to make laws about another person’s body because I should not be able to make decisions about your body. That should be between you and your doctor. Do I think God is for or against abortion? I think God is for people. I think God is for healing people. I think God does things that we don’t always understand, for His good pleasure. I think He cares more about us loving each other, than our laws that we impose on each other. I don’t think God wants us to let women die because they couldn’t choose a life saving medical treatment. I think He doesn’t want us to treat medical professionals and women that need to make a choice about their own life, treated with hate.
Furthermore, I think that when you don’t know what to do with your life, you should ask God. He knows you better than anyone else. When you are concerned about someone else, I also think, instead of judging or criticizing someone else, you should pray for them. Again, God knows you and them, better than you do.
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James, the brother of Jesus, wrote in James 1:5
If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him.
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If you have had an abortion and you feel guilty you can always go to Jesus. He has already died for your sin. He has already forgiven you. He will show you how to forgive yourself. He will heal your wounds. Jesus came to show us the way to live a life free of law and sin. He came to show us how to love each other and ourselves.
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Paul wrote in Romans 8:1-2
There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit. For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has made me free from the law of sin and death.
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Our job on this earth is to learn to love. Not just that but to stop being afraid because perfect love casts out all fear (1 John 4:18). To sum up I will let Paul’s words finish up this article. His words seem to say it all:
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Paul wrote in 1Corinthians 13:1-13
Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing. Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice is iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails. But whether there are prophecies, they will fail; whether there are tongues, they will cease; whether there is knowledge it will vanish away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part. When I was a child, I spoke as a child. I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things. For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I shall know just as I also am known. And now abide faith, hope, love, these three: but the greatest of these is love.
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
He made me afraid and I am sorry. My failure to love scared me. My lack of empathy for the death of Charlie Kirk scared me. Even as I wrote strong words to explain my fears, I didn’t understand what I was doing, and that is the truth.
I took a break from media for a few days so I could let myself rest and control my input better. I was overwhelmed and tired. But as the end drew near, the very mention of his name, made me angry and so I asked God why I was so angry. Why did this one person bother me so much?
So I made myself listen to the news, listen to what was being said and not being said and later to what God had to say. The news called Kirk a Political Activists and Debater. I have seen myself as these things at times. But my need for and my greatest gift, is my empathy; something Kirk did not believe in — I heard him say this with his own mouth. There are many people groups that he did not value as I do and this hurt me too. I felt that because he believed that a few gun deaths each year, justified our 2nd amendment and this flippant comment may have warranted his demise. I was so afraid of his platform, I stopped loving; I lost my empathy.
This is where I failed. I let my fear make me small. No matter how we justify our opinions, if we are functioning out of fear, we are small and we make God small. But God is not small. God is infinite. The words of a person cannot take root in us if we are not open to them. If we are aware of who our Creator is and what our job is, we can walk tall and love big. But when we fail we can always bring our failures to God and He will help us to see what slowed us down or what stopped us from doing what He created us for. I did this. I brought my tears to Him and I confessed that I let my fears stop me from loving and He understood and He forgave me and helped me forgive myself. He is still working with me because this is no small thing and it has several layers.
I decided to find out what I had in common with Kirk, to help me know him better. We both co-founded and held the position of executive directors of our non-profit organizations. He wrote books and I have a blog and write for a number of websites. He was a host for a TV show and radio show and I produced my wife’s TV show and radio show. He and I both had conservativereligious and political influences, growing up. We also have beautiful wives that are talented and capable. From there, we have much that is different about us.
I am old enough to be Charlie Kirk’s aunt, because he is the same age as my oldest nephew. This tells me that although he has an impressive resume, maybe Kirk didn’t have time to grow fully into himself. He was raised with wealth, he had opportunities for education, even if he didn’t take them, that I didn’t have. He was physically healthy. He and his wife are white and straight, he is from Chicago and she is from Arizona. My wife is mulatto and we are queer, she is from North Carolina and I am from Washington. He was raised in a Pentecostal church and chose to change to a Christian Nationalist religion. I was raised in a Southern Baptist Church and then was part of a Non-denominational church and now study and praise the Lord at home and with friends because I haven’t found a church I fit in. I have never said that Kirk was not a Christian, but the fact that there are foundational differences between us, I do think I would have asked different questions of Jesus. My relationship is probably different.
My friend Joshua Simila sent me a message that really made a good point to me. He said:
He held up a mirror for parents. We have an entire generation of kids that are overstimulated, too much technology, having extreme melt downs and can’t debate properly. No matter what side of politics you are on, I hope my kid is prepared to go to college without having a full blown tantrum during a debate. Americans have become extremely spoiled.
I work in the school system. I have nothing against our nation’s kids, many of them are full of kindness and good qualities. I have seen some of the greatest examples of compassion and responsibility from this generation coming up.
However Summer, we are seeing some of the most unregulated emotionally charged destructive behavior I have ever witnessed. I am a parent within the millennial age group. I know this first hand. Charlie is causing division that we unfortunately need. Your generation knows how to debate properly. This one doesn’t. I’m being completely honest in this. They aren’t getting consequences and having to learn. We are failing them (parentally). They deserve so much better.
I saw Mary Steenburgen and her husband, Ted Danson, on TV Sunday night, receive the Bob Hope Humanitarian Award. In her acceptance speech she said there are two main emotions that all others come from: Love and Fear. She said that we are at a time where we are out of balance. This is the reason for the work that her family does to bring more love into balance. I really respect her statement.
Robert Pape from the University of Chicago was on Face the Nation on the same night. He does research and critical surveys. He has found that although politicians want to blame all political hate, that has become so prevalent, on the media and specifically social media, he is emphatic that it is the fact that there is something to hate, that is causing the rise of political violence.
I don’t think that Charlie Kirk and I would have been friends. There were enough differences between us that I am not sure we could have enjoyed our time together. Some of our beliefs may have even made us peaceful enemies. Meaning, we would have:
Chosen to agree to disagree
Pray for each other because the bible says to pray for our enemies
Do what we can to live in peace with everyone
Let God deal with those that hurt us
Conquer evil by doing good
Bless those who hurt us by doing good
It is never okay to use physical violence to make your voice heard, but if you don’t feel that your representatives are not working for you, I can understand your angst. However, that means you must make time to make phone calls, write emails, hold signs and make your voice heard in peaceful ways. All violence does is make it necessary for legal action to be brought against you and people to live with the pain you caused.
We are in a time where it is easy to become tired, angry or just not ourselves. It is good to unplug and regroup. That is what the Sabbath is for. God knew we needed time to have quiet and rest and time with Him to restore us so we can have a fresh face to tackle the next week. So we can love better.
I am sad for the loved ones of Charlie Kirk. I know they are mourning a great loss and I pray they find comfort with God and each other and that they grow in their mourning in a peaceful and loving way. I am sure he is with his Savior.
I am confirming that I do not agree with any political party. I believe our government is corrupt and run, much of the time, by self-serving individuals. But I am praying that God help me to love all of them with His love because He made them too, in His image.
I am sorry where I failed you. Please forgive me. Be blessed.
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
I am neither sad nor mad about the end of Charlie Kirk, other than to question why he was so profoundly important to others and I need help. Some of his words were small, they lacked empathy and were not from the Jesus I know. He called himself a christian, yet he did not love all his neighbors in a way that I can understand, the second most important law, according to Jesus. He would spit out the 10 commandments but he didn’t show that Jesus was the new covenant. That loving God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit and all our neighbors is the entire purpose of being a Jesus Follower. Nothing else matters. Jesus told us to be a humble, peaceful, generous, merciful servants. This was not this man’s message as I heard it.
We should be upset that on the same day Kirk was killed, a woman who came to the United States from Ukraine for protection was murdered by a mentally ill man, with a huge history of violence. Even his mother had asked for him to be committed, and yet, he was still on the streets of North Carolina; a walking time bomb.
Why do we not have better legislation is place for dangerous people?
We should care that also on the same day Kirk was murdered, when someone brought a gun to a school in Colorado, we should be thankful that a student would be willing to throw himself on that gun so that there were only 3 people hurt. We need to be celebrating this 18 year old man!
There were two school shootings on the same day but we are only talking about one, over and over…I can’t see why Kirk is more important than these children.
I do not know that Charlie Kirk would have thrown his body on a gun to protect others because I don’t know him. I don’t know if he was that selfless. If he did know how big God is, I didn’t see a God as big as mine in his messages. But maybe I wasn’t listening well.
Maybe this incident where Kirk was silenced, was just God pruning an unfruitful branch, as it mentions in John 15. Or maybe I am broken somewhere.
I don’t mean to be cruel. I know a wife lost a husband and 2 children lost a father. I don’t know why I can’t feel genuine empathy for them. It is usually abundantly available for me to offer for people in prayer, which I did pray for his family and loved ones, but it was not as natural as it usually is and for that I need to talk with God about. My humanity is getting in the way and I don’t know why.
I am afraid because I am not recognizing myself. Why does the mention of his name or vision of his face make me feel so angry?
His words hurt me. They sliced into me because some of his words were unloving, dis-inclusive, violent at times, and arrogant. Sometimes they were perfectly programmed “christian” words, and I am sure he did believe them, but Jesus came to teach us to love, He said He came to bring division, but that was because He knew humanity so well. Jesus’ words could get into our egos and without the pure soul, where love can grow, it can become foul, and then some of us would care about things that we have no business thinking about. That is evil, and I am afraid that sometimes, that was where Kirk spoke out of, even if it was unintentional. That is very sad.
Am I speaking from there too?
People hide behind the phrase, “We have a right to have our own opinion.” This is true. But words are important. God tells us that we have the power of life or death from our mouth. He told us to be careful. I am not rectifying the murderer’s actions. Murder is not ever acceptable. But what if Kirk’s words hurt someone so badly, they felt like they had no other choice? We may never know.
Or what if this murder is also meant by another evil, to bring even more division in a church that is already divided, on the eve of an event that at one time brought us all together for at least a moment?
Twenty four years ago, I know where I was when I heard about the Twin Towers. I remember that day more clearly than most days in my life. It started with a dream about it, before it happened. It ended with me being at a church worship service dancing and praising Jesus. But soon after some United States citizens began to hate Muslims and do terrible things to them, even though, they too were United States citizens, and they were in pain also by the loss of almost 3,000 people, and they had nothing to do with the plans of evil men from al-Qaeda.
I invite you to take a breath. Bring yourself to your center. Don’t try to blame anyone right now. The facts will come as they are supposed to. Today is a day of remembering. 9-11 brought our country together like no other day in a long time. We were quieter, more appreciative and we had been given a different perspective that helped some of us. Death is not always just an end, but also a door to a newness because as we mourn, we begin to live differently.
God loves you. No matter what name you call Him/Her/They. For a moment let that be enough to empower you to love others. That is the purpose of this life, there is no other reason we are here.
I will get the answers to my questions when I am ready for them. But if you want to pray for me, I appreciate that. Be blessed.
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Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
I have never felt more confident in God or connected to Him in my life than I do now. Being brave is almost like breathing. Being who I am has never been less complicated than now. I don’t know what changed but I don’t feel like competing with anyone anymore, even myself. I do what I can with the effort I have energy for and I am grateful.
I have always known I was put on this earth for something special. I have known that I have been here before and I have a special task which is why I can ask God to teach me how to do something and I will have a dream about it and wake up with new knowledge. It has never occurred to me to not ask Him for the simplest of things, even in picking out a melon at the grocery store.
I will never forget a time I was at the store, right after church. I had just asked God which cantaloupe to buy and one had glowed so I put it in my cart. Someone from church saw me and asked me how to pick a good melon. I told her my method and she gave me the oddest look and walked away. I could not comprehend her response. We had both just left church.
But a few years later, when I was 20 years old, I finally heard God’s voice. He told me it was time to leave. He told me they had taught me all they could teach me. So I left. 10 or so years later, I visited. I had grown far beyond where I had been spiritually, but they were giving the same sermon I had heard back then. This church didn’t really encourage spiritual growth, they encouraged spiritual dependence, but not on God, on human dogma. Just like we see in our society and politics.
Our Creator made us to be curious, powerful and confident in Him. He empowered us to be successful in every situation. Society has put up walls to make us believe we are smaller than we are. If Jesus lives in us, we are priests and royalty, just like Him. We have to live up to that. He will help us if we are willing to live this way.
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
Trump’s followers are so wrong when they say he is bringing people together in faith. In my opinion, Trump is not bringing us together. He is setting us against each other and up for failure. How can a man that has been married 3 times and cheated on all his wives and has abused women and laughed about it in public, lead anyone to faith and family? I certainly don’t respect him. But I do pray for him and I do ask God to help me have love for him.
Wake up!
These same people want to say the democrats are to blame for everything. How can you say ‘the left’ is trying to ‘erase faith from public square, rewrite history, and replace God with government,’ when that is exactly what Trump’s administration is doing? But don’t think I think the democrats are any less guilty than the republicans in the “establishment,” because both parties have made the rich richer and the poor poorer.
I do think it would be glorious if 1 million people prayed for each other every week. Even more if they prayed for wisdom on how to overthrow our current government and build one that invested in education, healthcare, good jobs and infrastructure, plus a fair tax structure that includes taxing the rich so that we would have a strong middle class and less homelessness.
Trump’s kind of change is not something new. It is social blindness. It is either oligarchy or poverty. It is war. Because it is coming. And no one will be protected.
Try praying about that. World War III is coming. But it doesn’t have to start between United States citizens, we can choose to stop fighting each other and remember that at the end of the day we all want the same thing: safety, love and community.
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
Although I can hear the love you are trying to convey in your message, I still feel sadness when I read your words. I have been walking with Jesus since I was 5 years old, and He came to me in my back yard when I was playing alone, under my apple trees. He found me when I was alone and then I was never alone. He came before my family fell apart and He has seen me through many traumas. It has been 44 years since that day.
He is smiling at me now.
I didn’t understand myself growing up. I was different. I didn’t have many crushes growing up and I didn’t get googly eyed like my friends did. I thought I was broken. I also thought both men and women were beautiful. But I was raised by my nana, who told me never to waste my affections on someone I wouldn’t marry, while teaching me to be a lady, so I just focused on what was in front of me. I met my wife at work. We were friends for 10 years. She actually helped me through a terrible break up with someone I had also been friends with for 10 years. When I got sick, really sick, she was the one that helped me get well. Although I was aware of feelings, I thought they were just coming from her, until they were not only coming from her. We got married 11 days later.
It took me a year of therapy (I have been in therapy most of my life) to be able to say I was bisexual and later to learn the word demisexual. The first year of our marriage was beautiful and God was with me. I just told people I had married my best friend. That was true. But it was also true that I had not chosen to be bisexual and demisexual. I was created that way. I was also created to be more than that and I was confused, but God wasn’t. When I asked Him if I should divorce my wife, He said, “No.” He also told gave me the following scripture:
There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus. Galatians 3:28
I believe that sex and gender are human issues. They are something we only deal with on earth, because in the new world we will have heavenly bodies and will not be given away in marriage. I believe that God knows our hearts and He is bigger than a book with words in it that has been edited by humans. Did you know that the word homosexual was not added to the bible until 1947? It was added by humans that wanted to control other humans. The term they were trying to describe was abusers. Consenting people that are committed to each other and love each other are not abusing each other.
My wife and I have been married 11 years. That is longer than both our parents were.
What makes me the most sad about churches that are not affirming, is that they claim to be the body of Christ, yet they create these areas that are ok to judge people and set them aside. I know that I can come to your church, and I will probably be treated kindly by most, feared by some, ignored by the ones that don’t know what to do with people like me and wife. But some day you are going to preach something from your pulpit about how my marriage is an abomination to God and if I brought one of my Queer Family members to visit that day, they might not have made the same peace with the incorrect doctrine, as I have, because Jesus is the Living Word of the bible. The one we read has been translated badly. What can I do to change their broken heart?
I appreciate your kind words but I can’t affirm your church.
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
I am a Jesus Follower. I do see value in ALL people because I believe God made them. God told us to love our neighbor and He did not differentiate between anyone.
I have read the bible many times and it says to take care of the fatherless, widows, the sick, to be kind to emigrants and everyone because we have all been made in the image of God; we are all connected.
There is a different standard for christians than those who have other beliefs. This makes sense because if you have never read the bible and accepted the word for truth, how can you be held accountable to it?
I don’t have a lot of grace for people that call themselves christian yet don’t love all of God’s creation, who don’t have empathy and compassion and care as we were told to. Who don’t do as we were taught to. This is the apocalypse we were warned about. The undressing of the church.
There are people that call themselves christians that have protected rapists. They are cheering on others who terrorize the innocent. They have made money and power their god instead of the Creator while justifying murder of women and sick people who can’t get proper medical care, while they shout about their religious beliefs and our christian nation. They have continued to pay for wars while innocent lives are annihilated, even as children starve.
No. Not all Christians are the same. Some know a God that is gentle and lowly in spirit and wants to bear your burdens. Some Christians know that our God laughs at the enemy now because in the end, they have nothing. Some Christians really do love their neighbors, all of them, but we do not have much use for the ones that are hurting themselves or the ones they are hurting because they have decided they are not worthy. But I pray for them too.
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Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
I just added appointments to the calendar for imaging to see if the cancer is gone. I’m fighting an anxiety attack. I am supposed to do 3 more radiation treatments and I am terrified. I should be safe. I am taking 10 mg of Eliquis, twice a day. I should not be worried about blood clots. We have a plan for injectable blood thinners while we commence with radiation but I am just working through what I wrote during this time. I am just getting to a place where I can begin to push myself to build muscle. I don’t want to be broken down again. I’m just feeling sure for now. I don’t know if I am ready to be brave enough for another battle. Even if Karen G Clemenson is with me most of the time, I am still the one who has to fight. I am the one that has to bleed. I am the one that will wake up to a body that isn’t mine but is. I know I am lucky; my cancer is curable. It is slow growing. But it still hurts. I’m still gun-shy. I don’t want to trust people that are helping me but are going to cause me a ton of pain. I want to be done now.
This message is a very vulnerable one. I try hard to not live in this state because I know that I am here to live the life that God has created for me to live and I am not afraid to die. In fact there are very few things that I am actually afraid of for myself.
Angry Men Yelling
Earthquakes
Snakes
Personal Suffering
Other People Suffering
But through this time where I have had to undergo things that have shown me I am stronger than I realized, I know that the prayers of others have helped me so much. Although I try not to complain too often, when I have posted that I was suffering, those posts have been overwhelmed by the caring of others and I have felt the prayers and love from people I have both met and not met.
In a world where I have chosen to not join a church per se, I have found a church family, right here on Facebook, where there are people that regularly check in with each other and support each other, even if we have never met. We pray for each other and lift each other up and I find that to be refreshing because we don’t have to, but we do.
So when the moments come when I want to be done happen, I am always encouraged by you to keep going because there is always someone who cares and gives me encouragement. Thank you.
~
Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
I recently have begun looking for old songs that have called to me throughout my life. I hummed a tune to Karen and she immediately began singing “Wade in the Water,” which, with a very small amount of research, I learned is an Underground Railroad Hymn. It was used to communicate how to travel from slavery to freedom.
“Wade in the water
Wade in the water, children
Wade in the water
God’s gonna trouble the water.”
These words tell people to make sure to stay off the path and get into the water because the slave hunter’s dogs couldn’t smell their scent when they went into the water and the rivers led to salvation. Wading also implies defiance. Unlike swimming or floating, you must push against the water and current to wade in the water; it is work to stay steady in the mud and rock and grasses.
Although my ancestors came from Europe and Canada, I have always seen a beauty and connection to Native American and Black culture. I feel connection with trees and tall grasses in the wind. I love to feel leaves, as though we are talking. Worshiping with Jerry Chapman, a local Native Pastor, showed me the beauty of drums and how we are all connected. In my 20’s I learned so many lessons about how I was made to understand more than one realm. Through nature God shows us that we are all one. Because He made the first man and breathed His breath into him and humanity was created.
I don’t need to read or listen to the news to know a catastrophe has happened. I can feel it. When I was a child, I would see things and have dreams that scared me. But as an adult, with the bible and more experienced teachers, I learned how to pray about these things, limit spiritual attack, and now I am learning to rest.
Recently someone sent me a short video of a white woman. Her message was that people make groups to divide us: Queer/Straight, Black/White, Disabled/Able-Bodied…and we just need to love everyone. Tee Hee (I am sorry that is what I heard in my head…and I know it is judgmental and not fair)
My problem with straight, white, healthy women telling me to just love everyone, is not that I don’t agree, or that I don’t think she might not be sincere, but she, or someone like her, has been saying something like that for a long time, while straight, white, healthy men keep making laws that make it harder for queer, or disabled, or people of color, or women to live their lives the way they want. God made free will for everyone, not just white men. I know not all white women support some of the terror in the world, not all white men are terrorist, and what I am saying might sound unfair. It is.
My black, queer, disabled family would like to invite you to research what other black families still are living with. Maybe read about what queer communities have to deal with. Have you read about some of the issues disabled people face? Yes we do need to love each other but we also need to know each other.
I think “Wade in the Water” is a universal song. We are still struggling and everyone struggles. We are all needing salvation.
“See those people dressed in red
Must be the children that Moses led.
Wade in the water
Wade in the water, children
Wade in the water
God’s gonna trouble the water.”
~
Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
Jesus told us that we could tell when others were true believers of God by the presence of the Fruits of the Spirit in their life. I don’t care what someone tells me about themselves. If I don’t see these attributes in their life, I know they are not a true Jesus Follower and I don’t expect good things from them. It helps me not judge them or be angry with them because they don’t know the love that I do. It helps me be at peace and feel more love, joy, patience, goodness, generosity, etc…
I want to clarify that I don’t think that only christians can have the Fruits of the Spirit: Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self-Control. I know that many religions teach these attributes and some people naturally have these characteristics. I know that Jesus spoke to people of other faiths and He had many friends while He was here on earth. There is one rule to being a christian, but there are many ways to be a good and loving human.
I think I am starting to understand maybe some of what God wants me to learn by His choice of our president. We want to believe that The United States of America is a christian nation but we are not truly united and we are definitely not only christian. Groups of people mess these ideas up because “group think,” while it can be powerful, is not how we do our best. We were all created to be in a personal relationship with a higher power, in my life it is the Trinity of God, Jesus and Holy Spirit; He is supposed to be the main relationship in our lives, yet we easily give this spot away to politics, religion (which is very different than relationship), addiction and idolatry, and the human condition: lust, pride and greed. We let our emotions drive us away from God, rather than towards Him so He can help us sort them out (I am so guilty of this too). We judge others before we realize that we now have made ourselves guilty, when we should be praying for each other.
I understand the frustration and anger, the pain and fear because as a human being, I am compelled by the same fragility that all humans experience. But we can also choose to love. We can choose to look around and ask ourselves, “How can my anger benefit someone and when is it causing a problem?” MOST of the time, our anger must be let go. Sometimes anger compels us to do important things. But most of the time, it is only to show us where we need to cry out to Jesus.
I am trying to remember this. I am trying to let go of the austerity I once thought was important. I am trying to just tell my Savior, sometimes only in groans and tears that I am sad, overwhelmed and I need help. When I hear of people being murdered or taken advantage of on the news, I pray for the hurt person and their loved ones. When I read about war, I pray for help and wisdom, because only God really knows all the details. When I hear about tornadoes and other scary weather and I can hardly breathe, for the pain I feel for those that are in that turmoil, God knows what I can’t say. When my friends are hurting sometimes I just sit with God because my pain is too big and I don’t have to say anything because God loves them more than I do.
No politician can give me this. There is no amount of money that can buy me this type of safety. Even my friends and loved ones are going to fail me, but Jesus never has. He deserves my attention. God’s Spirit is love, which is where all the Fruits of the Spirit come from. We learn these for ourselves by spending time with Him. That is why we need Him.
~
Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
I don’t think I could put in words how much I love, need and want Karen G Clemenson. She is it. As I grew up I had made lists of what I wanted in a partner. I have never taken choosing a partner lightly and I am not casual about sex at all. Karen is one of two people I have ever been with. She even helped me get over the first guy, promising he would come back, until I finally told her, I didn’t want him to come back.
I have loved 3 people in my life and there were about 10 years between each person. I was friends with each person first. My lists always changed as I had my heart was shattered. Because I love completely. I am so grateful that I am demisexual because I don’t have overwhelming sexual feelings that get in my way until I have bonded with someone emotionally, intellectually and have learned if they are worthy of my trust.
When I prayed to God and asked for a partner I was shocked that Karen was the one. I had been fighting my feelings for some time, to be honest. I was raised in a conservative family and conservative religion and being gay was wrong. However, I had also walked with God since I was 5 and I had an authentic relationship with God and there had been many things God had shown me, that I had been taught, that were wrong.
It was still 1 year after we were married, before I could verbalize that I was bisexual and demisexual. But I also knew that God knew that I was queer. He made me this way and He loved me and this very small part of who I am, is part of the calling He has for me. Nothing I have ever done or ever will do, will ever change how much He loves me or that the salvation He created for me is mine. He promised me that. I am supposed to love Him, let Him love me, and love my neighbor. He will fill in all the blanks.
Karen and I have this little joke. She asks me — Who loves you? — I always answer, with a smile on my face: Jesus.
The only competition Karen has is The Father, The Son and The Holy Spirit. I do find other people attractive but I don’t want them. We talk about that. Neither of us wants anyone else. And even the most exquisite looking person can open their mouth and say a selfish, judgmental, or hateful thing and suddenly they are no longer interesting to me in any way.
I have had people try to use their religious beliefs to justify their fear that I am going to hell. I am sick of this. It just isn’t true. God created inclusion. The word “homosexuality” wasn’t even added to the bible until 1947 by white people that wanted to control the narrative. I do realize the bible I read, in its imperfection, was inspired by God, but edited by man. This doesn’t stop me from reading it, but I read it with Jesus and I ask questions and wait for answers.
Karen was the best gift God ever gave me. When I could not hide that I was sick anymore, she was there. I had never been taken care of before. I had been the one to serve. I am an artist and chronically ill. I don’t know what my body and mind will be like from day to day; I don’t often know what I will say until I say it. She is never intimidated by me, my body, my mind or my ideas. She loves the challenge and surprises. On earth, she is my rock and I am her’s. I don’t take this for granted.
On the flip side, she eats healthier, dresses better and has more organization in her life than she ever had on her own because once we were married, we both learned, we needed someone to take care of. Her blood pressure is normal, her weight is exactly what her doctor wants it to be and her muscle tone is impressive. Plus she has some pretty great aspirations that she would never have attempted if she didn’t have someone cheering her on. Who else is going to correct her when she says she is crazy and tell her she is just juggling a lot?
We make an amazing team. I thank God for her all the time. I can’t and don’t even want to imagine life without her. We have healed and grown so much in this relationship and I wish that the kind of love, trust, honesty and kindness we share was in all partnerships. If there was, there would probably be little to no divorce and less STIs and unwanted pregnancies too. Because when you have all you want in your relationship, you don’t have to look anywhere else and you make decisions together and you don’t do things to tear down the team.
I am a blessed woman.
~
Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
I have read the bible by myself for the joy of it all my life. But when I was younger it was also taught to me to prove myself and others wrong, to find sin, to weaponize Jesus and His word. I don’t know if the people that taught me to do this, did it with intention to weaponize it, or if the people that taught them to do it had that reason, but somewhere along the chain, there was some intent to manipulate and control others. When I learned what I was doing, I began to ask God to help me unlearn this behavior. I did this because I could see that it wasn’t helping anyone get closer to God but just the opposite.
This behavior has been used to morph into political gain as well. It makes me angry and sad, depending on where I am and who I am with.
I have been really hurt by well-intentioned people at church. I sometimes, but rarely, visit churches now. My experience at church is nothing like the relationship I have with God when I can just be myself. God has told me I have specific callings on my life. He did not make me to fit in a church. But I did get one method of reading the bible every year from one church that I enjoy. When I finish, I start again and because I have grown and changed each year, the scriptures are different for me. It makes each time I read a scripture like it is new and I learn something special or deeper.
The Bible Was Created to:
Aid in building relationship with God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit
Teach history and culture
Bring the reader to their own repentence
Edify and encourage the reader and others
People get confused. They think because Paul, a fallible man, talks about how to run a church that we are supposed to tell each other how to live, but Paul often gets full of himself, and being a Jew, he still liked laws a lot.
Jesus said to love the Lord our God with all our heart and soul and mind and love our neighbor as ourselves. If we could do that we were good. He also said all judgement was given to Him, the Son of God, on Judgment Day and He wasn’t judging yet.
Being a Jesus follower is actually pretty simple.
The hard part is letting go of all the lies humans, well-meaning or not, tell us, dropping the bad habits that don’t serve us as well as we once thought they did, and learning to set boundaries that are healthy because our bodies have limits and how can we give freely, and out of love, if we are exhausted and feel taken advantage of?
As we learn the heart of Jesus, we get used to hearing from the Holy Spirit. We learn what our calling is. For some people it is to be parents. For some it is to be a teacher. For some it is to be an encourager. Everyone has an a calling. You wont know if you don’t spend time with God and the best way to learn His voice is to be in the word.
I ran into another Jesus follower the other day. She has been through a TREMENDOUS time in the last few years and she has a HUGE calling on her life. Not unlike myself. I didn’t even know what to say to her. I was astounded by the power that resonated off of both of us. We don’t even cross paths very often. I have been watching her on Facebook. All I could say was: Be blessed. She said the same and we kept going on our own paths.
Sometimes that is all we can say; or all we should say. If I had said more to this amazing person, my human insecurities might have come up and she has come through too much to deserve that. God is dealing with us in different ways. I am so happy for her. I want her to stay exuberant.
This is another reason why it is so important to read the bible. How else can you recharge and reset when we live in a world that is so anti-whatever we are called to do, if we aren’t plugging into God? I know the bible is not perfect. It has been inspired by God, but written and manipulated by men. But it is also beautiful and inspiring, if you really push in and ask the right questions. I don’t remember when I learned this but somewhere, I learned that it was acceptable to ask God questions and wait for the answers. It might take a long time or just a few seconds, but He always answers. You might also have to be open to hearing Him too. Some people are scared of hearing Him but the Jews missed out on a lot of blessings because they were afraid to see His face. They believed they would die if they saw Him and so it was true.
In actuality, He created us for His good pleasure and He delights in us. Just the fact that you think of Him makes Him happy. Imagine what you taking the time to ask Him a question and waiting for the answer, must do for Him. God is a lot more open and loving than I ever imagined or was taught as a child. He wants us to love each other and make space for each other. There is no one that God doesn’t love. That might be hard to imagine, but it is true. It is also hard to reciprocate but God and I are working on that in me. Anyone that wants to honor that in themselves can ask for that. God in all His love and mercy is glad to give good things to His children.
God doesn’t care if we are republicans or democrats, straight or gay, able bodied or disabled. He does not care where our ancestors were born or what color our skin is. He finds all of us fascinating because He created all of us. In heaven, we will be like angels and wont have bodies like we do now, so sex and gender wont matter anymore. In heaven, I imagine there is a great big dining room table for us to fellowship at. Will you be comfortable there if you didn’t learn to live with different types of people on earth?
~
Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
Nana never spoke about her cancer and I never asked her to. I wish I had. Maybe she would tell me what I am feeling is normal. I have done everything the doctors have told me to do, no matter how painful or humiliating and still the cancer lives inside me. I am a very modest person and I have had more strangers look at me naked in the last 3 years than I have in my entire life and I don’t even get the joy of being a mother. I knew I never would, even when I was young, but sometimes that pain feels new again. I know I am tired of the fight inside me.
Nana was a lady; very graceful and well-spoken. She taught me to be a lady, as well. I was often teased by my friends for some of my lady-like habits and called a snob for my vocabulary. Nana hated swearing. She said there were so many wonderful adverbs to choose from, why did people have to resort to such low speech? I remember, even my father’s second wife would tell me that she hated the look I got on my face when she swore, she felt judged. I don’t know what look she was talking about, but other people said the same thing. All I can say about my father’s second wife, is she is not a lady. In fact, after years in therapy and trying to make peace with not fitting in, I saw her flip off one of my relatives at a Christmas party and my thought came loud and clear: Why am I trying so hard? I don’t like these people and they don’t like me. I wouldn’t put this effort into strangers.
I can’t say I never swear, the fact still remains, I am the biological daughter of a sailor (Coast Guard) and my father was my preferred parent until he left us and between him and the kids at school, I learned a lot of ways to use words that Nana was not going to teach me, but I have to get pretty angry to use those words. But I am beyond even these words right now.
I am exhausted. The kind of tired that sleep can’t fix because when I do sleep, I have nightmares. I know it is stress. Considering radiation for my next cancer step has been difficult. It has been me, accepting that my body has failed the medication route. It is me accepting another, probably, painful treatment and more people looking at my naked body. It is me wondering if this will actually work and worrying about the side effects that the doctors can’t know about because I have fibromyalgia and she is a vindictive bear and she doesn’t like to be poked. It is me having sharp shooting pain in my face as my trigeminal neuralgia is triggered and stiff jaw joints as my TMJ joins in the party.
But is also the memories that are being unpacked that I don’t want to remember. My youngest sibling and my nephew are in town. They are helping my mother clean out her house. She is getting ready to sell her house and move out of state. My mother and I have made as much peace as we can. We know we love each other but we can’t have a relationship. We pray for each other. She emailed me and told me she would put my things in a storage unit and send the key to the gym so we could come get it. I thanked her. But my sibling started emailing me. I have had no contact with this sibling for years. The last time we communicated they told me to stop contacting their children.
All my siblings have said this to me.
Being an auntie was the most wonderful thing that had ever happened to me and those relationships were my most dear until I married Karen. I loved listening to the kids. I loved playing with them. I did not want to be their parent. I wanted to be their auntie. But my siblings felt like I wanted too much.
When my sibling wanted me to come to my mother’s house to unpack the garage that I had cleaned so many times over the years, where half of my things went into when we moved there because my new room was half the size of my old room, where I collected things to finally move out one day, even if I could have done it, I could not have done it with them there. I had always done everything alone. This sibling offered up my ability to see my nephew as a prize and it felt a punch in the stomach.
My nephew is a man now. He could choose to have a relationship with me if he wants to. I won’t have his parent be a go-between. I already gave all I could give to them when I helped to raise my siblings, and ALL that entails, and when I helped to take care of their babies, until they didn’t need me anymore and they told me to stay away from their children. As much as I love my nephew and cherish every moment I spent with him, I want a real relationship, not one build on manipulation. Even if that wasn’t the intent, that is what it felt like.
Manipulation is what I remember growing up. If I put up with a certain amount of abuse, I got a few new books. If I got my hair done, I owed a certain amount of chores, more than usual, even though I was on call 24/7 always. On the day my father and his second wife told us they got married (yes they didn’t even tell us they were getting married or invite us, even though they had lived together for a few years) his wife told us that their marriage would be more important than any of us kids. At least that statement was true. I always felt like I was being crushed. If I ever felt happy, there was always someone that knew how to take it away from me, so I learned to swallow myself.
My nieces and nephews were the only people in my family that I let see the real me. I let them see my joy, curiosity, love, mercy, compassion…anything good that was in me. I know that maybe that was hard for my siblings to see because that was not the Summer they ever got. They were raised by an angry, abused, absent Summer. They got the worst of me most of the time. I think my youngest sibling may have seen some of my goodness, but when they told me to stay away from their children, it had been probably years since they had seen anything good from me unless it was directed at their children.
Years later, I had always thought I had taken all the abuse, which is what I wanted, but after so much therapy, it became truth to me that that was probably not true, even though it looked like they had it easier, that doesn’t mean they were in a healthy environment. My siblings have their own traumas, even if they don’t remember them or have PTSD like I do. They might not mean to hurt me but they do. I had to choose myself at some point. And that point came when I was diagnosed with cancer.
I wish Nana and Grandpa were here. They always knew what to say. I was watching an interview of Pete Buttigieg on the Late Show with Stephen Colbert and it was so refreshing. Although Grandpa was a republican, Buttigieg being a democrat, doesn’t change the way he speaks from reminding me of Grandpa. He always pauses after a question to consider his words carefully and he uses beautiful words that mean tremendous things and when he has the opportunity to say something negative, he always takes the high road, while having a dry sense of humor. I know that many people, that are no longer in my life, might not agree with me, but I try to live my life in a way that emulates my favorite parts of Nana and Grandpa. People that do not bring out the best in me, or I don’t bring out the best in them, can’t be given much of my time because it is not healthy for either of us. This doesn’t mean I don’t have love for them, it actually means I am giving them the most love I have for them, by not abusing them or myself.
I know I can’t have a relationship with my parents. My father chose his second wife and I won’t have her in my life. I don’t think I can have my siblings in my life because I don’t think I can forgive them for removing their children from my life. I know they didn’t understand my relationship with their kids; they probably thought I wanted more than I actually did but I just wanted to love them and to be part of their life, to watch them grow and listen to what the kids had to say. I know my siblings didn’t like it when I told them what their kids actually wanted, but we come from a family where kids tend to be seen as extensions of the parents and not actually individuals and I didn’t want my siblings to make the same mistakes our parents made. My parents didn’t know me at all, if they did, they sure didn’t communicate it well to me, or they didn’t care. Neither did my siblings. In fact, I don’t know my siblings either.
I am curious about my nieces and nephews. They are all adults now. I assume they are busy with their own lives. Maybe some day they will Google me and reach out. I would love that.
Today, while I wrote this, I defrosted the freezer and cleaned out the microwave. As I washed the plate for the microwave, I thought of Nana because I wash dishes like she does. She often didn’t use a brush or wash cloth to wash just one dish, she just used her hands, scraping at hard spots with her finger nail. The other night I had a dream that Grandpa had set up a new game for one of my siblings and I to play. This particular sibling and I have no relationship. But while we played we were having a great time.I wondered why I would have a dream like that. After praying about it, I know that part of the reason we don’t get a long is that we are too alike, but also we didn’t get an opportunity to be playmates. Dad left too early and I had to become a grown up. Grandpa was letting us play in my dream and we were having fun. I am glad that Nana and Grandpa are still coaching.
If you want to watch that interview with Pete Buttigieg on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert:
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Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
Someone asked me, today, if I thought all people that supported 47 were a certain kind of people. They used an acronym that I don’t know and that Google doesn’t know so I couldn’t answer their question. They were responding to a post that was actually a rough draft for my post: Why Aren’t People Angry Like Me? that ended up on my blog, so if they didn’t read my blog they didn’t get to read where I went with it. But regardless, I was very angry when I wrote both posts. But I have been thinking about who supports 47.
I still agree with what I wrote, but the level of feeling has died down and I haven’t read any news or watched any news for 5 days. I have been focusing on me. Reading my bible. Reading books that I want to read, which are not light reads, but are not directly related to 47, which tends to be a topic that gets me going pretty fast.
Left to my own peace-loving self, I believe that most people, regardless of where their politics lie, are good people; helpful people. If I had a house and it was on fire, I would not ask that only firefighters of one party show up at my house because the other party would not do a good job. If you were walking down the street and you saw me trying to save my family, you would probably help me pull my family from my burning house, or at least make sure 911 had been called, and maybe even hold a hose towards my house for me, while I helped my loved ones. You might even pray with me while my house burnt down. We would never ask who we voted for. We would just be happy that my wife and I were safe and my cat was counted for and I was even able to grab the safe with our documents in it. We might hug each other and you would be glad that The Red Cross came and we had a safe place to go to that night until our insurance took care of this mess. We would never talk about politics. Even if one of were wearing a MAGA hat. Even if one of wasn’t a Jesus Follower, we still might hold a moment of silence and lift up positive thoughts to the universe for our new friendship. Because I believe that when we don’t let stuff get in the way of the good parts of humanity, we are all connected.
I have never been rich. But I have been related to people with money. I know how to act around people with money. I know what to do with money. I know how to make good decisions with money when I have it. But I love love more than money. I love people more than money. I am a chronically ill person with a body that doesn’t do what I want it to do most of the time and I can’t be a reliable employee so I rely on my disability checks. My wife is a genius but was never encouraged to go to college. When she finally tried, she had a brain aneurism and it has taken her a long time to overcome the financial problems that caused. But she is a hard worker and an asset at every job she has ever had, although, she is rarely paid much over minimum wage and hasn’t had full-time hours in almost a year. But we have love and we really like each other. We have always enjoyed being with each other, even when we were just friends. So I consider us very wealthy.
We will probably never see a year where we make over $60,000, let alone $400,000. I am ok with that. It seems like a lot of responsibility. But you better believe, we are generous with the small amount we now have, so I know it would be just that much more fun to give if we had more! That is the way we live.
I am neither a republican or a democrat. I believe if both parties are truthful to their platforms, they balance each other out and I like that. But I don’t even think either party has been totally truthful to their own platforms for a long time. I miss when republicans wanted a balanced budget. They would have never voted to raise the debt ceiling before now, and especially not at the hundreds of trillions of dollars that 47 has proposed. Republicans like low taxes but in their hay day they would have seen that we can’t afford to cut taxes with our national debt this high. I don’t mind that democrats are often called socialists, a little socialistic behavior is good for the economy when you have children in homes that can’t feed them; how will they ever rise above their situation if they don’t get a good education and healthy food? So schools should be fully funded and children should be fed and have health insurance; they are our future. Anything we can do to help families, we should do because it helps children grow up and, “be best,” to borrow a phrase from our First Lady.
I am saddened that 47 is so set against the growth in civil rights we have made. We live in a world, where it is still not fair to be a person of color, a woman, a queer person, disabled, a senior citizen or a naturalized United States citizen and these groups of people still need help. They don’t need to be stomped on, erased or forgotten. This program to erase Diversity, Equity and Inclusion is downright mean. I don’t know why some white men need to be coddled so much. As a fellow white person, even though my family is only 3 and 4 generations in the United States, so yes, I think immigration is wonderful, I would like to remind you that white people stole this land from Natives. White people should not be the dominate race here.
I am avoiding the news this week. I am doing it on purpose. My anger got too big for me to handle last week. I have cancer. I often forget about that. With my 14 diagnosis, only one of them can be cured and it is the cancer. 4 of them are mental and the rest or physical and I never feel great. So the cramping and the exhaustion, they could also be something else. But I need to not be so stressed out that I am screaming at my wife when she comes home or I can’t answer a question without crying or shaking or having nightmares. My therapist is right. There is nothing I can do to change the trajectory of where things are going in our government. I don’t have time to fact check every post people put out there to make sure it is true, but many of them are complete lies. There are only so many emails I can send to my representatives.
What kind of people do I think support 47?
If I had to guess, people that like money, people that want more money and think he can deliver.
I think people that think it is ok to define other people and people groups, even if they have no idea what it is like to be those kinds of people, and tell them how to live their life, support him because he seems to be doing their beck and call, pretty well.
I think people that don’t have faith in science or believe that we need to change how we use our natural resources before we drown ourselves and scorch the sky, probably support 47.
I think people that believe that vaccines are dangerous for everyone to use and think they don’t need to care about themselves or their loved ones enough to find out if there is a medical reason why they should avoid them, or just a stubborn streak that is stopping them from protecting themselves and their neighbor, probably like the cabinet that 47 has chosen; regardless of the years of science that proves that vaccines cause disease to be eradicated.
I think that many people have thought that government has been too big for a long time, but I am not sure many of them had what is happening in mind when they said to drain the swamp. Or maybe they did, maybe people that support 47 like that hundreds of thousands of people are out of living wage jobs and have no health insurance and many programs that we have grown accustomed to accessing, are working worse that ever now that we don’t have people to man them. Maybe those people are very happy about this. I don’t know. I haven’t done a poll to see what kind of people still support 47. But I know that in April we have been waiting for a year for my wife’s FMLA benefits from when she had her hysterectomy. She has applied for help with the VA several times and she tends to get lost in the shuffle. I have sent in paperwork over a year ago for a disabled plaque so I can park closer to buildings, over a year ago and it has never come. I also ordered a copy of my birth certificate about 2 months ago; I was born in Washington State…it hasn’t come yet. All these federal programs could work better and I don’t think firing people is going to make them more efficient.
I also think that white supremacists and christian nationalist like 47 a lot. I think he likes them too. He gives the racists a freedom they haven’t had a in long time. A place to put their hatred. Even though I have heard him say he is not a christian, I have also heard him say he likes how loyal christians are. They definitely can be that.
I do know that a lot of people that support 47, seem to love the massive amounts of deportations of illegal immigrants, even if they are not criminals and need asylum, even though one of our greatest United States symbols is The Statue if Liberty and at her feet is a plaque that says: Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me, I lift my lamp beside the golden door! The Statue of Liberty – Ellis Island Foundation, Inc. This is what the Clemensons would have seen when they came over from Norway to Ellis Island and created their new name for a new life.
There might be more kinds of people that support 47. I don’t want to take my imagination any further.
One of the books I am reading is the founding documents of the United States. I bought it because I wanted a copy of The Constitution but I am also finding a lot in the other documents that are available in the foundation of the United States of America. Our colonists were really abused by England’s king. Many times, in more than one document it is stated that we will not have a king. The reasons are made very clear in more than one document. A king is not all powerful. He must still answer to his Parliament, however he still has power and he did some horrible things to us in his anger and attempt to own us. We have forgotten this. 47’s comments about being king, whether they are a joke or not, are not only unconstitutional, but need to stop. There is a reason we chose our type of government. We chose a president that answered and was held accountable and had less power than our congress on purpose. Our congress is made up of elected officials that can be voted out so that we the people hold the power. This is important to remember. This our country. The United States of America is 47’s too, but he is just one man and he works for us.
Another book I am reading is called Frauen. Each chapter is an interview of a married woman during the Third Reich. Depending on the social class or education level of each woman, the interview is vastly different. The experiences of these women are sometimes similar and sometimes extremely different. Some of the women knew Jewish people and were empathetic to the situation for them. Some women knew that not only Jews, but anyone that wasn’t what was what was considered perfect (disabled people, elderly, queer, gypsies, spies, criminals, black people, etc) were in the work camps and some camps were specifically death camps. Some women had an idea of what happened in the camps, but they were terrified and didn’t talk about it because they might end up there too. Some women didn’t know any Jews and only knew the propaganda they had been taught about the “dirty Jews.” Each story is hard to read. I spent most of my high school experience studying the holocaust, but it was always from the viewpoint of the survivors of the camps. I have never read anything from the people on the outside. Some of these people lived right next to the camps and they had to “not know.” Ignorant, uneducated people that were very religious, although Hitler did not believe in religion and religion was not part of Nazism, were what he wanted. These people were the easiest to manipulate.
I can see why people keep saying they see similarities to now and the Third Reich. But this is not 1933 and we are not in Germany, where we have just lost World War I and we have not recovered yet.
We are The United States of America. We do things our own way. We need to remember this. 47 is president, but this is our country.
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Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
I want to confess to you that I am very human. That even though I am a Jesus Follower and I have been all of my life and I have seen Him do amazing things that I am still afraid. I wake up every day and thank Him for my blessings, because I am a blessed woman, and I pour my heart out because I am afraid, not just for myself but for people that don’t know the faith I do. I am also angry. So angry. More angry than I have been in many years because people that claim to be christians are so selfish and have voted in an antichrist as our president and prepared his way with bills in Congress so he can’t be impeached, and voted in his budget that will not pay down any of our debt but will increase it by hundreds of trillions every year, take money away from children, elderly, veterans and the sick, while giving more money to people that already have more than enough. Where is the mercy and grace in this? I ask God every day to help me not sin in my anger, but I know the thoughts I think, and they are not pure. I am sorry.
To feel so unimportant, to feel so erased, and to know so many feel this way, doesn’t make me want to pray for our president or our Congress, although, out of obedience, sometimes I do and sometimes it is even the kind of prayers God can honor, because I am always honest with God and He knows I am human and He knows where I fall short and where I let myself imagine letting all the people that are hurting others go in my mind, because I feel powerless, not because I condone violence or murder, but because I feel my pain and the pain of others and in moments of exhaustion, it seems the only way to make it stop. But I know I am wrong. I know violence only begets more violence and peace is what I really want. Yet this president doesn’t like peace, he thrives in chaos and in making people uncomfortable, so while he is in office, this is what we have.
I have accepted that all blame doesn’t belong on 47 or Musk. They have been empowered by Congress. And Congress has been empowered by republicans, regular people that do not want the same things I want. But I am still very angry. Hopefully God will be able to show me what to do with my anger because I don’t believe anger has to be bad. Jesus got angry. For many of the same reasons I am angry now.
I have a friend that tells me government is too big. It shouldn’t be in our religion, schools and such. I agree, government should stay out of religion, although I don’t mind if churches pay taxes. I also think schools need to be fully funded and offer meals to children and if that means that we need federal funding to do it, than so be it. Some families need more help than others and children should not suffer because their parents or their states can’t or won’t excel. I also think, as the bible says, we should mind our own business and get the hell out of each other’s doctor appointments and procedures. Adults should be able to have any medical procedure necessary for their medical and mental wellness and it should not be a political issue but a decision made between individuals and their medical team alone. What a waste of time and resources we have created by politicizingabortion or gender affirming care! But there are other government services that are being cut right now that are important: transportation, food inspection, national parks are just a few. Some government jobs make it easier to work with other countries, get to work, have safe food to eat, prevent disease through vaccinations and new treatments, go to parks to relieve stress and have fun, help people pay their bills because they are too sick or old to work, just for example.
Jesus said it would be hard for the rich to get the heaven. He said this because He expected us to share. He told us to share freely. He said to not store up things on earth, but in heaven. Many of these people that agree with what is happening want to say they are christians but they don’t want to share, even when what they have more than enough.
I read that even though the goal of DOGE is to find waste, that 47 and Musk were talking about giving the money they found to the people, but not to the people that need it, the people that make over $400,000 per year. This statement makes me angry, not because I won’t get any of that money, but because any money they find should go directly to pay down our national debt. This is also why I am angry about tax cuts for the wealthy. Fiscally we have no business cutting taxes when our national debt is the highest it has ever been. I would even not be so angry about the rape of Medicaid and SNAP programs if it was going to pay down our national debt, but it isn’t, it going to make up for the tax cuts for people that don’t need it.
Why aren’t people storming the White House? I don’t understand why everyone doesn’t understand why these decisions are terrible, not just nationally but globally? The decisions that are being made are going to make The United States of America weak in every aspect. Why aren’t people angry like me?
On top of all of my feelings, to be truthful, my fears and anger are not just about other people. My feelings and fears are about me. I feel like I did as a child. Always knowing that I would have a terrible thing to deal with every day, but not knowing what it would be, who it would be about and how much it would hurt. Never knowing which version of my parent would show up. Never having the tools I needed to handle the stress and emotional neglect and violence I had to shoulder in my abusive, while well-meaning family. I hate feeling like I can’t protect myself or my neighbor. I don’t like feeling like a child. I find myself always looking over my shoulder, checking my email for a news article and trying to deal with that constant pain in my stomach and heart because I know people are hurting because of the choices of politicians and people that I can do nothing about, except pray. And even though I know this is enough, it doesn’t feel like it, because you can pray for someone for your whole life and then realize that they get to choose to be who they are and they might never align with your prayers because they have the right to be who they want to be, no matter what you ask God for. I know this because I prayed for my family to love me all my life, to know the God I knew, for them to hear me and they can’t do it or wont do it.
Because we all get to choose who we are, even if they make laws that say otherwise. 47 can make all the executive orders he wants about gender but Queer and Trans people have always existed and they always will. You can’t erase us. You can make abortion illegal, but they will always happen, whether you like them or not. The more pressure you put on humanity, the more we fight back. You can accuse President Zelenskyy of not being grateful or not wearing the appropriate suit when he visits but he still didn’t start the war in his country, and we know that Russia did and if World War III begins, it might just be because 47 has raised tariffs to a ridiculous level against our biggest trading partners, while teasing them with adding them to the United States, antagonizing the world with buying them out and not supporting organizations that we have always supported, to keep the world in balance, until every country gets sick of 47 shooting off his mouth and they decide to shoot at us and then what will we do.
Yes I am very angry.
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Feel free to leave your comments below!
My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
I was on Facebook, the other day, and I found myself on a feed of a more conservative perspective, where people were enjoying their right to free speech, and I came to realize that these people were the people that voted in the politicians that are responsible for the chaos we are in right now. I always hate it when people just blame the president for every issue we have because the president only has the power Congress allows them. Congress is more powerful than the president. And it is Congress that has empowered 47 and Musk. But it is voters that empowered Congress and 47 and Musk.
The lack of care for individuals, these people showed, should not surprise me. They were ok with thousands of people losing their jobs and health insurance. They were ok with the impersonal way these people are being let go. They were happy with the fear that some of us feel. They considered anyone that disagreed with them garbage and felt free to say it in all sorts of nasty ways. I didn’t comment because I knew they couldn’t hear me. The inalienable right of every man to pursue their happiness was irrelevant to anyone but themselves.
As we watch our scientists lose their jobs and funding, I wonder if anyone with the power has considered that this investment in future knowledge is part of our culture and power. That our reach for science compels us to find answers for illness and technology that also creates relationships even with our enemies. As we isolate ourselves from a world that we helped create on a global scale, this sudden rejection is not going to make us better or great. As our Congress allows our president to run his mouth, unchecked, one day the other countries will get sick of the stress he brings and we can only wonder when war, which our country had been able to keep off our shores for a very long time, might just come to meet us and there will be no one to help us.
I know that all presidents reject executive orders and projects of previous presidents, but the extent that 47 has done this is extreme. Someone asked me about what I thought about the pipeline project that Biden stopped and laid off workers, that Trump had begun when he was 45. But in actuality, that project was begun when Obama was president and before they could get too far, testing showed that the pipeline would poison the waters that the pipeline would be under. It would affect the fish, animals and people that were around that water, so it was stopped by Obama. 45 started it again because he doesn’t care about our environment or our health. When Biden got into office, the same testing happened with the same results that were found when Obama was in office were estimated and Biden put a stop to the project. At the time, there were no definite numbers as to how many jobs the pipeline would create during the build, but they were only temporary jobs. In the end there would only be 50 jobs created to maintain the pipeline, once the project was completed. This, by far, is a much smaller number that the hundreds of thousands of jobs that have been lost and will continue to be cut because of 47’s crusade to make government smaller, even if we need those government workers.
This same person asked me about nurses, doctors and state, local and federal workers that lost their jobs because they refused to be vaccinated for COVID-19. This was an easy response because I have voiced my opinion many times that my rights are superseded by my responsibility to my neighbors to be vaccinated, because the bible says I must love my neighbor as myself, without prejudice. Since I am not allergic and have no medical reason that stops me from being vaccinated, I am up to date on all my vaccines. As a medical professional, I would expect all my medical team to follow the same standard I do. People that work in the medical field or want to work for the government, unless they have a medical reason for not getting vaccinated must live to a different standard as the general public. If they don’t like it, they should have picked a different job.
One of my friends said this: I think we are in the situation we are in because “we the people” have allowed our government to dictate our lives. We are allowing “agencies” to spend without accountability. The people who were supposed to be accountable were not doing their jobs. The fraud and/or theft that has been discovered is insane. The Fed’s shouldn’t be involved in education or religion or anything not constitutionally put in their power. Including health care and providing for the poor. When you ask a person to work and take part of their labor pay to support the well-being of another, you have made the working class a slave. Our country has been a complete mess for quite some time. You can’t blame this on a month.
I don’t really have an answer for all of this. When she shares her information with me, we often disagree, so we are good at agreeing to disagree, because we love each other.
Except for religion, which I believe should never touch politics, government was needed to create balance in schools where states would not or could not. Without government help, some children have no chance of rising above their situation. As far as helping the poor, a healthy working class creates a healthy tax payer, better parents and more stability in society; it adds to the economy when people spend that money on bills, groceries and goods.
The defunding of research not only holds us back from reaching for the answers we need for the future but the relationships we had with other scientists in other countries. The fact that 47 has referred to himself as the king is unconstitutional and confusing to other countries. The fact that he will raise tariffs on Canada and Mexico in a few days, our biggest trading partners, will either be the biggest mistake 47 has ever made or maybe just another error, we will see. 47 has blatantly lied and said that Ukraine started the war with Russia when we all know it was Putin, all along. 47 has tried to erase all transgender people from existence, that is at least 1.4 million people. He is also making it so that businesses can’t choose to use diversity, equality and inclusion practices without fear of the government coming down on them. He has cut off communication between the CDC and the United States people during a break out of the bird flu, measles and flu so we have to rely on the media. He has also provided a long list of words that you can’t use when applying for grants or you will automatically be denied. Some of these words are: woman, black, trauma, victim…just to name a few. This is just a short list of what 47 has done; there is actually a lot more he has done. It has been a very fruitful month for 47.
Someone did question my christianity. I do not call myself a christian. That word has been ruined by people that have not spent enough time reading the Word or have warped it to suit their own purposes. I am a Jesus follower. I am not perfect, but I try to follow Jesus with all my heart and sometimes that causes me to say things people don’t want to hear. Which is probably just one of many reason that I don’t think that politics and religion should mix. I don’t believe I have the right to tell someone how to live their life and I certainly don’t want you to tell me how to live mine.
I am trying to be fair and relate to others. But to be honest it is hard not to be scared.
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My name is Summer. That is how you can call me. I hope that I am a blessing to you. I am not perfect. I will fall again. But I am forgiven. For anyone reading this that isn’t a Christian, unapologetically, I am a Jesus Follower, but I believe there is room for lots of beliefs and religions in the world. It is not my intent to offend people with different beliefs than I have and I would be open to open-minded conversations with no goals of changing anyone’s mind, but sharing information. If you are interested in becoming a Jesus Follower…Do you know Jesus? Do want the Holy Spirit to fill you and give you understanding and salvation? Ask Him. Want someone to pray with you? Contact me.
If you would like to know Jesus as your friend, but want to make this amazing commitment by yourself please pray something like this: Thank you Jesus that You are the Son of God, the God that created heaven and earth. Thank you Jesus that You came to earth in the form of a man so that You would be able to empathize with my humanity. Thank You that You did this in order to fulfill the promises You made at the foundation of the world. I realize that I am a sinner and do things that hurt myself and keep myself away from you. Thank You that You died for my sins so that You could defeat death and bring me into Your life. Please forgive me. I ask You to be Lord of my life. I ask you to heal my hurts and show me what my new life, empowered by You looks like. Thank You for Your mercy.
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